IndigoGeminiWolf is back

[AnthroHeart]

Hi everyone,

It’s great to be back. I had some internal clearing to do. I’ve meditated to Holosync each day, and I am noticing differences in what gets me upset. I noticed it didn’t bother me when I made two wrong turns the other day while driving my mom to an appointment. Other than that, not much else has changed with me. I am still trying for disability due to my schizophrenia as I was denied the first time. So I am working with a company to do an appeal, but won’t know the outcome for 18 months.

Yes, I still love anthros. They are one of my favorite things. I have interest in them and in the afterlife still. For instance, it is very easy for me to feel love for the character on the left, named Saunders and drawn by Oomizuao. I fall in love with fictional characters for brief moments. Just imagining touching their ear can make me mushy.



I have learned that I need to find my own happiness. That other people aren’t really even thinking about me, and therefore I must not base my feelings on the external world. I get confused sometimes about what I should be doing in order to be of service to others.
This video here brought me back to this forum. It answers why we should even care about raising our spiritual vibration. Though I think the answer is more than just so we don’t feel bad.



I can still feel energy. I can still tune into these “fictional” beings from whatever dimension/reality they exist in. I have not yet felt oneness, but I have felt love so strong that it made me break down weeping. And that was when I was alone.
Somoene once commented that I will shine like a billion suns in the afterlife. While I want my afterlife to be amazing and with few regrets, I don’t want to live my whole life for the afterlife.
I may be fat, but I’m not bitter. I create my own happiness. I don’t open myself to the whole Universe because of experiences of the past. I cannot allow myself to accept all things, because it becomes dangerous for a third density being to do so.

TONS of synchronicities while I was gone.

I decided that I should stop trying to go it alone, and so I am back.

[anagogy]

Sup. Nice to see you back old friend.

[AnthroHeart]

[Jim Kent +]

Welcome back gem! Good to have you back! 

[AnthroHeart]

Energy drifts. When I think about something, energy begins to snowball.

When I focus on that yellow anthro above on the left (Saunders), I feel energy being pushed to me. I can't send it, but I can absorb it.

I get the impression he is a fifth-density being. Such a being would only exist in 3rd density in the astral planes or higher.

I sense fifth because his energy is dense to where I cannot push any to him. He just radiates it outward and it helps to clear my chakras.
And it feels rather neutral. Not overly positive like fourth density. And not so much trying to polarize like 3rd density. It is just like a constant flow.

He makes me feel like I'm walking the steps of light, the love and light he radiates. My system has just got to get used to it.

[AnthroHeart]

Welcome back gem! Good to have you back! 

Thanks Jim.

[Minyatur]

Glad to have you back brother.

I think I haven't been alone to feel like the forum lost part of its spirit and heart without you.

[xise]

Welcome back, friend

[AnthroHeart]

[AnthroHeart]

During my time away, I hired some freelancers to help edit and promote my book. I stopped drawing and just found out my tablet isn’t working. I learned they denied my disability and I have a company that’s going to appeal that for me. But it will take up to 18 months for a decision. Let’s hope my temporary disability will last that long.

Let’s hope more that my book takes off and that it can support me. I’ve already typed up about 120 pages for my 2[sup]nd[/sup] book. And also have about a paragraph for my 3[sup]rd[/sup] book. I stopped writing though because I don’t want my 2[sup]nd[/sup] book to come out too quickly after the 1[sup]st[/sup]. Also because I’ve gotten lazy.
I’ve had a few disagreements with my mom that I don’t want to go into because I don’t want to portray a negative tone. I’ve been focused on my book being successful, and imagined how my life would be if it was. I keep thinking that I want to move somewhere they have Gigabit internet, with fast uploads too and a large data cap.
I want to get a Nintendo Switch, but I’m waiting to get that with my first book check.
I paid out about $14,000 in taxes because of withdrawing from a 401k from a company I don’t work for anymore. I should get a good amount back in my taxes. I keep thinking how I can help others if I do get some substantial income. But I need to learn to invest and save. I am right now investing in my book. But if that doesn’t do well, it’s just a risk I have to take because I have no other chance to support myself long-term.
I only have about 1/3 of the money I had just several months ago. It’s gone out fast because I kept spending. So I’ve slowed down. I’m trying to spend less than $300/month in food.
I’ve had trouble falling asleep at night. Last night I meditated in between trying to sleep and it seemed that short amounts of meditation counted for longer times had I been asleep. Meditation seems more efficient for getting rested.
Today I’ve been focused on allowing the Universe/kundalini to flow through me, so that I can have a better chance of graduating when walking the steps of light. But I need to also get out and meet people. I will get out more when my book comes out. Perhaps lots of book signings. Might need a manager and a lawyer.
I’m somewhat astranged from everyone I know in person except for 2 people. And with them communication isn’t always up to par. I have a fursuit now, so I want to come up with reasons to wear him. I bought an Amazon Echo which I use to play a couple of playlists when falling asleep. Also to change the color of my bedroom light and turn it on and off with my voice. Also to turn on and off my backup 8TB drive with my voice.
I have a Google Home as well which is in our living room. Sometimes I stream that to the TV when playing videos off YouTube.
Well, that’s about it for me. Hope I answered your questions.