02-25-2010, 04:33 AM
Hello everybody,
I would like to share my story, or better put main part of the story.
At first I would like to express my gratitude to all of you for being around, helping and sharing.
I am 43, have a wonderful family, my wife is really a caring friend and my two sons 10 and 5 years are wonderful beings.
I was always interested in the big picture of how the things are, why are the way they are and what is my purpose within it. At my early ears I was a kind of doing opposite of what most of the people wa telling me, just for the fun of it to experience that I can do it differently. I was reading a lot of science fiction, paranormal etc.
In my 20-s and early 30-s I was interested in rock climbing and high mountains and climbed peaks in the Alps, Caucasus and Himalayas. Then came paragliding. I feel strong attraction to pure natural environment and I feel well and energised when I am in such environment.
At age of 30 I joined a local machinery engineering company which was set to go international. I started there pushing hard in the business development and sales, giving all my energy and attention to this endeavour. This was my top priority for about ten years, I was successful and company grew and became a leader in it's filed in the world. I travelled to more 35 counties on all continents, met different people and have done business. It was easy for me to meet new people, to understand what there problems are, to see the similarities and to focus on cooperation rather than of differences. However as the company expanded we installed a new organisation and business model. Our personal relations inside the company seems to fade away in aim to reach 'highest professional standards'. I was at managerial position and had hard time to manage people and processes the right was as it was different than the way my innermost being wanted the things to be. I was kind of obsessed with the work with questions like am I performing right, could I do better which led to I am not good enough etc. Gradually I felt worse and worse and resigned from the management still working well with major accounts of the company. The situation around me was getting more and more formal and the human relationships were not a priority. I blamed strongly myself for not being able to cope with the reality around me. I visited shrinks few times but quickly realised that they can not help me because they themselves do not know how to. So after many inner struggles I quit after almost 12 years without having an idea what will do and how will support my family.
I had a lots of free time to focus on thinks I was attracted to like researching spiritual, esoteric, psychology, new technology areas. Several months after I quit the company I was diagnosed a scary disease confirmed by three specialists. The traditional approach would not give guarantees that can handle this however the therapy suggested was harsh and not holistic in any way. I decided that will not go this way although this is the traditional way. I realised with the help of many books, movies and interviews that I am responsible for my condition, and actually for all the circumstances in my life. I took the alternative way with the support of my wife, changed my diet and way of life dramatically, used reflexotherapy, acupuncture, supplements etc. A year later I feel well and healthy, no expansion of the symptoms.
Thinking about all this today I am thankful to the people and circumstances that gave me so much hard time. I am even thankful to the 'disease that happen to me' as I believe it came as catalyst to foster my personal growth and evolution.
I still have hard time to support my family but have found a huge inner expansion of my being. I have faith that whatever happens is good for my evolution, which is the purpose of the whole exercise/ game. I came across Ra materials just few months ago but I was completely ready for it and it resonated with me so deep.
The whol story is know to my wife only, I did not share the details even with friends because I thought they will not benefit anything from it.
I sensed an urge to share it with you and just did it.
Thank you once again and hope to be around with you in this most interesting and challenging times we live in.
Namaste.
I would like to share my story, or better put main part of the story.
At first I would like to express my gratitude to all of you for being around, helping and sharing.
I am 43, have a wonderful family, my wife is really a caring friend and my two sons 10 and 5 years are wonderful beings.
I was always interested in the big picture of how the things are, why are the way they are and what is my purpose within it. At my early ears I was a kind of doing opposite of what most of the people wa telling me, just for the fun of it to experience that I can do it differently. I was reading a lot of science fiction, paranormal etc.
In my 20-s and early 30-s I was interested in rock climbing and high mountains and climbed peaks in the Alps, Caucasus and Himalayas. Then came paragliding. I feel strong attraction to pure natural environment and I feel well and energised when I am in such environment.
At age of 30 I joined a local machinery engineering company which was set to go international. I started there pushing hard in the business development and sales, giving all my energy and attention to this endeavour. This was my top priority for about ten years, I was successful and company grew and became a leader in it's filed in the world. I travelled to more 35 counties on all continents, met different people and have done business. It was easy for me to meet new people, to understand what there problems are, to see the similarities and to focus on cooperation rather than of differences. However as the company expanded we installed a new organisation and business model. Our personal relations inside the company seems to fade away in aim to reach 'highest professional standards'. I was at managerial position and had hard time to manage people and processes the right was as it was different than the way my innermost being wanted the things to be. I was kind of obsessed with the work with questions like am I performing right, could I do better which led to I am not good enough etc. Gradually I felt worse and worse and resigned from the management still working well with major accounts of the company. The situation around me was getting more and more formal and the human relationships were not a priority. I blamed strongly myself for not being able to cope with the reality around me. I visited shrinks few times but quickly realised that they can not help me because they themselves do not know how to. So after many inner struggles I quit after almost 12 years without having an idea what will do and how will support my family.
I had a lots of free time to focus on thinks I was attracted to like researching spiritual, esoteric, psychology, new technology areas. Several months after I quit the company I was diagnosed a scary disease confirmed by three specialists. The traditional approach would not give guarantees that can handle this however the therapy suggested was harsh and not holistic in any way. I decided that will not go this way although this is the traditional way. I realised with the help of many books, movies and interviews that I am responsible for my condition, and actually for all the circumstances in my life. I took the alternative way with the support of my wife, changed my diet and way of life dramatically, used reflexotherapy, acupuncture, supplements etc. A year later I feel well and healthy, no expansion of the symptoms.
Thinking about all this today I am thankful to the people and circumstances that gave me so much hard time. I am even thankful to the 'disease that happen to me' as I believe it came as catalyst to foster my personal growth and evolution.
I still have hard time to support my family but have found a huge inner expansion of my being. I have faith that whatever happens is good for my evolution, which is the purpose of the whole exercise/ game. I came across Ra materials just few months ago but I was completely ready for it and it resonated with me so deep.
The whol story is know to my wife only, I did not share the details even with friends because I thought they will not benefit anything from it.
I sensed an urge to share it with you and just did it.
Thank you once again and hope to be around with you in this most interesting and challenging times we live in.
Namaste.