Current dilemma

[Melissa]

Thanks for your input Phoenix. I don't feel screwed over and I'm not a fan of punishment either. I did what I thought was necessary at the time without thinking too much/or informing myself about the consequences. Which is why I'm reluctant to decide what to do next, all this crap is just tiring and saddening which I think is an indicator that I'm trying to paddle upstream, so to speak. On the other hand there's this tendency of avoiding stuff which makes me feel uncomfortable (like seeking legal advice). I can relate to your points A, B & C, though I have no idea what it is I should do, but there's always this nagging feeling that I'm not doing what I'm supposed to do.

I'm actually quite scared that I'll spend the rest of my life waiting for some grand insight, or a simple moment of perfect clarity, as to what to do with my life.