12-22-2014, 09:52 AM
Firstly, the negative path is a remarkably difficult path to walk, even for those who actively pursue it. You can't negatively polarize (at least not by much) just by having selfish thoughts and personal ambitions. I know people genuinely attempting to walk this path and it is a lifetime endeavor for them. It consumes the entirety of their focus and most of them I still wouldn't consider even halfway there. Some of them have already gone quite mad because they can't manage the discipline required. What you are describing is simply the nature of human experience.
Secondly, I find it far more beneficial to simply be honest with oneself, as self-aware as possible, instead of worrying about trying to categorize one's thoughts into polarities. Search yourself for that which feels natural and right, regardless of which box you think it fits in. Live according to your own highest and best understanding, while realizing that understanding may change with experience. This is the only way to truly discover who you genuinely are inside, and I believe that it is impossible to significantly polarize without that knowledge.
The issue isn't whether you are having "STS thoughts", but how those thoughts make you feel, and where they fit into your overall experience. Everyone will experience both extremes at some point in their lives, as well as a lot of stuff that just falls in the middle. It is a process of trial and error that will persist at some level throughout your life without necessarily defining who you are. Learning to observe yourself objectively takes a lot of anxiety out of the process.
There comes a point in self-awareness where your own nature will become obvious. You gain a spiritual momentum that carries you forward without much effort at all. At that point you will likely find yourself already quite polarized without even having realized it. Just relax and be the best you that you can be, and you're offering a huge service to everyone regardless of your motivations.
Secondly, I find it far more beneficial to simply be honest with oneself, as self-aware as possible, instead of worrying about trying to categorize one's thoughts into polarities. Search yourself for that which feels natural and right, regardless of which box you think it fits in. Live according to your own highest and best understanding, while realizing that understanding may change with experience. This is the only way to truly discover who you genuinely are inside, and I believe that it is impossible to significantly polarize without that knowledge.
The issue isn't whether you are having "STS thoughts", but how those thoughts make you feel, and where they fit into your overall experience. Everyone will experience both extremes at some point in their lives, as well as a lot of stuff that just falls in the middle. It is a process of trial and error that will persist at some level throughout your life without necessarily defining who you are. Learning to observe yourself objectively takes a lot of anxiety out of the process.
There comes a point in self-awareness where your own nature will become obvious. You gain a spiritual momentum that carries you forward without much effort at all. At that point you will likely find yourself already quite polarized without even having realized it. Just relax and be the best you that you can be, and you're offering a huge service to everyone regardless of your motivations.
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