08-18-2010, 05:27 AM
Confidence is something you will have to find in doing. Thinking about it in my humble opinion isn't going to make too much of a difference. The problem with confidence as it stands is that like cycling if you start to think about it or judge what you're doing while doing it you're going down.
It's a bio chemical balance. Like training your muscles visualizing doing it helps but in the end you're going to have to "just do it".
Changing it takes effort but can be done. I don't think it's done with charts or meditation. I think this one is done by learning about the nlp concept of state, learning about bio-social status, keep on pushing yourself outside your comfort zone going after goals based on the above concepts.
First things first, stand up straight, lean on your stomach muscles and the muscles in your ass in a proper pose not like a coat hanging around your curved spine.. This will strengthen the flow of energy upward and is a posture your subconscious and surroundings associate with confidence. If you're standing confident you must feel confident and the subconscious will supply those feelings within 20 minutes. Your environment will supply you with confidence stimulating acknowledgements. If you haven't done this often enough to at least note that your posture keeps reverting to it's base state you haven't been doing it long enough.
Find an example who has confidence. It doesn't have to be someone you like or look up too. It just has to be someone who is confident. A famous rapper, Robbie Williams. Whomever. Observe them, try to pick up their vibe. Project it as if it's your own. Then adjust it to to match your circumstances and desires. (If you picked a selfish guy, make yourself not selfish but equally confident)
You have to learn to see yourself as confident to become something that defaults to confidence, and the only way to do that is to experience that. So steal other peoples vibe, trick yourself into feeling confidence by posture and by going back into times where you were very confident. Anchor those into your daily experience. The more you feel it, the more natural it will be for you. Combine this by seeking out experiences that require that confidence. And after a while you will be genuinely confident it will have become your base vibe.
Here's another base exercise, never break eye contact first. Smile, communicate a friendly nature, you don't want to seem threatening, but don't break eye contact first. It's harder than it seems. And changing your current behavior will make an enormous difference.
It's a bio chemical balance. Like training your muscles visualizing doing it helps but in the end you're going to have to "just do it".
Changing it takes effort but can be done. I don't think it's done with charts or meditation. I think this one is done by learning about the nlp concept of state, learning about bio-social status, keep on pushing yourself outside your comfort zone going after goals based on the above concepts.
First things first, stand up straight, lean on your stomach muscles and the muscles in your ass in a proper pose not like a coat hanging around your curved spine.. This will strengthen the flow of energy upward and is a posture your subconscious and surroundings associate with confidence. If you're standing confident you must feel confident and the subconscious will supply those feelings within 20 minutes. Your environment will supply you with confidence stimulating acknowledgements. If you haven't done this often enough to at least note that your posture keeps reverting to it's base state you haven't been doing it long enough.
Find an example who has confidence. It doesn't have to be someone you like or look up too. It just has to be someone who is confident. A famous rapper, Robbie Williams. Whomever. Observe them, try to pick up their vibe. Project it as if it's your own. Then adjust it to to match your circumstances and desires. (If you picked a selfish guy, make yourself not selfish but equally confident)
You have to learn to see yourself as confident to become something that defaults to confidence, and the only way to do that is to experience that. So steal other peoples vibe, trick yourself into feeling confidence by posture and by going back into times where you were very confident. Anchor those into your daily experience. The more you feel it, the more natural it will be for you. Combine this by seeking out experiences that require that confidence. And after a while you will be genuinely confident it will have become your base vibe.
Here's another base exercise, never break eye contact first. Smile, communicate a friendly nature, you don't want to seem threatening, but don't break eye contact first. It's harder than it seems. And changing your current behavior will make an enormous difference.