09-07-2010, 08:07 PM
Questioner, I see we have similar upbringing. Intelligence was a theme of my life. Watching from small eyes and with innocent respect for my parents knowledge, I had to learn the hard way what wisdom is, and that it was within me all along.
I found that there are many kinds of intelligence, like there are many ingredients to a recipe. Each of us are somewhat unique in what we can make with it...and that in that diversity we can create quite the buffet. How well we choose to use the ingredients of intelligence can show our wisdom. Whether it is with words, musical notes, paint, emotions or what have you.
I have also wasted 4 decades searching in empty wells...for how can anyone know you, cook for you and nourish you? Only we know what we know, what we need, and how to create it. Finally I see the empty wells have filled to become mirrors.. and now I look in them with an objective perspective when I can.
In my traditional soul, I believed a family was a foundation from which you always stood..rooted like a tree. It never really occurred to me that I could step off at any time and that it would be safe to do so. My father was the first to go...I never suspected my mom would. After all, we had defined the relationship in some sort of loyalty cement and it was something I had learned to count on. When the cement crumbled and I realized the foundation was an illusion I was destroyed myself for a time. Until I could see that yes.. the parental role is not forever and should never be seen as such. There is a point when you sail your own ship and untie your boats, and that this step should remain permanent. Our society doesn't approve, but sometimes our souls rebel. Parental possession is unhealthy...we are not their product to be used to gauge their success or their righteousness. Unconditional love is what they represent. In that, they let us sail our boat alone whether we are ready for it or not. It should be celebrated, the untying, not wrenched from the heart in fear.
I found that there are many kinds of intelligence, like there are many ingredients to a recipe. Each of us are somewhat unique in what we can make with it...and that in that diversity we can create quite the buffet. How well we choose to use the ingredients of intelligence can show our wisdom. Whether it is with words, musical notes, paint, emotions or what have you.
I have also wasted 4 decades searching in empty wells...for how can anyone know you, cook for you and nourish you? Only we know what we know, what we need, and how to create it. Finally I see the empty wells have filled to become mirrors.. and now I look in them with an objective perspective when I can.
In my traditional soul, I believed a family was a foundation from which you always stood..rooted like a tree. It never really occurred to me that I could step off at any time and that it would be safe to do so. My father was the first to go...I never suspected my mom would. After all, we had defined the relationship in some sort of loyalty cement and it was something I had learned to count on. When the cement crumbled and I realized the foundation was an illusion I was destroyed myself for a time. Until I could see that yes.. the parental role is not forever and should never be seen as such. There is a point when you sail your own ship and untie your boats, and that this step should remain permanent. Our society doesn't approve, but sometimes our souls rebel. Parental possession is unhealthy...we are not their product to be used to gauge their success or their righteousness. Unconditional love is what they represent. In that, they let us sail our boat alone whether we are ready for it or not. It should be celebrated, the untying, not wrenched from the heart in fear.