how do you deal with paranoia?

[OpalE]

the type that defies logic. When you think people are talking about you, when obviously, logically, they are not. When there's a sort of pervading sense of unease/fear.

Sometimes they are. I've experienced this and have witnessed third parties being targeted in this manner. I'm pretty sure i've participated. People seemingly having their own unrelated conversations, but the words seem to relate way too closely recent experiences / current dilemmas and sometimes even speaking exactly what you're thinking or phrases recently said in private. Sometimes it just sounds like random insults and criticisms. Once you notice it, every laugh and snicker seems pointed at you. The experience intensifies and more people seem to "be in on it."

Many seem to have no clue they're participating in this, but sometimes the people doing it are fully aware of your discomfort. They know that they are the cause, enjoy this, and "tap into it harder" to intensify it. The few people i've confronted eventually acknowledge it (with a couple of exceptions). Explanations vary (some more in depth than others), but usually contain something along these lines:

"I know i'm doing it, but it doesn't work if i think about it." "I don't know why, the words just come to me."

One person said: "It's just a way to feed, and what is taken is used to further feed."

If this is happening to you, it's like a mark you wear that says you're vulnerable, or a mind-state you fall into that attracts more of the same the deeper you go. People who recognize this mark and strike are not always aware of what they are doing ... it can work through people emotionally close to you without them even knowing it (so try not to always take it too personally).

The more it accomplishes what it's supposed to, the more it will happen. The more you focus on it / expect it, the more it will happen. Don't get scared. Don't let your breath go rapid and shallow. Don't let your attention fixate on "the people doing this." Couple things that worked for me:

Deeeep, looong breaths (that reach as far down towards your taint as possible) & "exhaling" or "melting" the tension in the body. The lower abdomen will want to tighten automatically while it's happening, forcing quick and shallow breathing.

Blank the mind, don't let your attention fixate on what is being said/done or how you fear it may relate to you. Hear it, but try not to think about it. Watch, but don't try to define. Just observe and relax. Acknowledge that you don't understand what is happening, then just observe what is. Take in your entire surroundings, not just the "object(s) of your paranoia."

If you're having trouble not fixating, a mantra or prayer repeated with the breath usually does wonders (silent usually works fine, but at very intense times i would mutter or whisper them). Choose (or write) the mantras/prayers intentionally (beforehand if possible). Make them meaningful and relevant in a way you understand.

"Soft gazing" at things helped ... looking at things while relaxing your eyes, taking them in aesthetically but not thinking about them (still focusing on the breath). Just look. Letting the eyes trace the edges of things slowly while relaxing them as much as possible worked very well for me. So did studying minute visual details and patterns in a calm and detached manner. (The breathing, however, is paramount in times of fear and paranoia. First and foremost, deepen and lower the breath and use it to relax the body.)