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[Aion]

I would say that I have not had any distinct transformation of my impression of the material from first interacting with it. My first impressions were still in the vein of my current impressions. However I have substantially 'unpacked' or learned of many of the intricacies in that initial impression.

I do agree that it causes a energization of all of one's distortions. However, the question for me has never been 'good or bad' but rather, what is the dynamic that is taking place? Rather than viewing the material as a 'thing in itself', I view it as a collage of relationships and interactions, each which serves to potentially illustrate or illuminate some part of the Creation in that you SHOULD be able to find both positive and negative philosophy in it if it is truly relating to Unity. That might strike some people as strange, but I think that's actually fundamental to the whole concept of Free Will as espoused by the Law of Confusion. They need to make both philosophies available.

So when I am talking about these entity interactions, I believe that Ra can totally see what is going on, yet is willing to allow things to take place for the sake of demonstration. The whole material is just a demonstration of, in their words, "the near-hopelessness of attempting to teach". I think it's important to look at the interactions of both sides of polarity within the material to actual come to an understanding of the underlying message of unity. That is why I conjecture of it both ways.

Truth be told, I think it's 'unpolarized' and that is why it causes such an uproar. The reason I think you have to look at the concepts of polarity is actually to do the work of the mental exercises of the disciplines of the personality. To work towards unified thought you harmonize opposites and these must be realized in the self. A mirror can also aid in this task, such as the Ra Material.

So am I projecting my distortions on to the material? Of course, but I can do that because they already exist in the material. Am I not all things? The material is just a tool for looking at myself, but the self that I am is the same as all others, so it is important to me how EVERYONE interacts, not just what's happening for me. I am maybe a bit selfish in that I do focus quite a lot on others but this is only because at one point I had a deep realization that the swiftest way to face my own distortions is by seeing others with the same distortions and thereby gain an observational awareness of my own behaviours reflected back to me. I think we all actually have ALL distortions, it's just a matter of which ones are energized. So by exploring all sorts of concepts and 'releasing the energy' you can de-energize your distortions in order to balance out the system. It's like EQ'ing music. Sometimes you need some dissonance to get the right tone for the song. Other times you need to maintain harmony.

People tell me to look at myself, and I say, I am. Everything outside of me reflects myself, right? It's all a process and the problem with these kinds of forums and communications is that you get a snapshot of someone's mind in mid consideration but then if it changes you have no way of knowing unless that person makes another post. So the whole sense of 'process' is very much lost over this medium. No one can see what is going on inside of me through my words and words are not adequate to explain to, so I can only offer confusion.

In the end, I am simply empty Infinity. Here and now, I'm just a guy trying to make sense of his impressions of the world along with the rest of the humans.

I'll also admit that sometimes I reflect certain distortions which are not my actual beliefs for the sake of bringing those distortions to light. This, again, can come across in communication as though that is my belief system, but in truth the contents of my beliefs is rather small, but the contents of my questioning is massive.