05-22-2009, 09:42 PM
Dear Tim, you live in interesting circumstances. Hang in there.
I'm also an all black kinda guy, at least I used to be, I pick greens and browns now. It helps people relate to me easier without considering me "A black hole" I've actually been called that..
Don't take the next bits the wrong way. (Some do) It is my understanding that we are what we send out. And at the same time, we become what we receive. This type of loop easily creates an upward or downward spiral. I assume you're in a self enforced negative feedback loop. It's not easy breaking out of those. Certainly not by doing more of the same.
Perhaps you should do something radical. All the meditating clearly didn't help you.And in my opinion living with the negativity of the new world order hurt you profoundly. It's not that you're doing it wrong or that you're not worthy or able. That's nonsense. Maybe you should try all other suggestions first if you must. If they succeed you're all done! If those do not succeed. Stop meditating and energy work and stop keeping an eye on the new world order for at least a month. The world isn't going to hell this month. And putting that weight on your shoulders is not a recipe for ascending. So screw the NWO. Let them worry about themselves for a change. I can guarantee they're already terrified for their own continued existence.
In that time continue with what you need to survive, make the efforts, do the job. But take a vacation from "Raising your energy". It hasn't helped you one bit so far clearly. I'm thinking you might be emitting the "Spiritual guy in survival mode desperately trying to improve his setting but not succeeding" vibe. The universe is giving you this.
So to answer your question "WHY?" : If it's not what you want. Why do you ask for it?
I asked the same question once. WHY? I was depressed in a romance that wasn't working. And failing in my then academic setting. I got an answer, crystal clear. Why? Because you love it! That's why! We don't really love our misery but it can be so addictive we keep asking for more. I managed to rectify my situation by stating clearly that I did NOT enjoy this. And I decided to do things I did enjoy.
By the way I don't know if this is any good to you but: Amazon is working on a record publishing solution. If you want to release your music you pay amazon a number of dollars and send them the music. Amazon then sells your music as a CD from their store. You keep 40% of the profits.. And no more action is required from you. No accounting no taxes no record deal negotiations. (Though I would recommend scheming your way into getting more people to know about it) It apparently takes only 9 sells to break even. I don't know the details or if it's a good idea or whatever you'll have to figure that out yourself. It might be an alternative if the indy label doesn't work out.
I've heard the music you've so kindly shared. That's definitely good enough, I got really trippy on it. I never did hear the end of it (due to all the snoring). Only you should not call it "Deep relaxation session" call it: "Tokyo autumn rain". Write a little hype filled blurb about what binaural beats can do for a person. Add the glamor of spirituality to your album. People buy more than just bits of music, they buy a fantasy, they want that, and if you give it, then they will be satisfied. (As we say here, lick it till it shines) I'm a bit of a word smith. I'll gladly help if you want me to...
But take a break from improving your life. And use the time to do something you enjoy! I don't know you well but music might very well do. Also make sure to enjoy the suns warm rays with a beer in your hand at least once. (She IS a power source and we often underestimate her effects)
IF you manage to do what you enjoy and make enough to survive. THEN do more of the same...
Namaste
I'm also an all black kinda guy, at least I used to be, I pick greens and browns now. It helps people relate to me easier without considering me "A black hole" I've actually been called that..
Don't take the next bits the wrong way. (Some do) It is my understanding that we are what we send out. And at the same time, we become what we receive. This type of loop easily creates an upward or downward spiral. I assume you're in a self enforced negative feedback loop. It's not easy breaking out of those. Certainly not by doing more of the same.
Perhaps you should do something radical. All the meditating clearly didn't help you.And in my opinion living with the negativity of the new world order hurt you profoundly. It's not that you're doing it wrong or that you're not worthy or able. That's nonsense. Maybe you should try all other suggestions first if you must. If they succeed you're all done! If those do not succeed. Stop meditating and energy work and stop keeping an eye on the new world order for at least a month. The world isn't going to hell this month. And putting that weight on your shoulders is not a recipe for ascending. So screw the NWO. Let them worry about themselves for a change. I can guarantee they're already terrified for their own continued existence.
In that time continue with what you need to survive, make the efforts, do the job. But take a vacation from "Raising your energy". It hasn't helped you one bit so far clearly. I'm thinking you might be emitting the "Spiritual guy in survival mode desperately trying to improve his setting but not succeeding" vibe. The universe is giving you this.
So to answer your question "WHY?" : If it's not what you want. Why do you ask for it?
I asked the same question once. WHY? I was depressed in a romance that wasn't working. And failing in my then academic setting. I got an answer, crystal clear. Why? Because you love it! That's why! We don't really love our misery but it can be so addictive we keep asking for more. I managed to rectify my situation by stating clearly that I did NOT enjoy this. And I decided to do things I did enjoy.
By the way I don't know if this is any good to you but: Amazon is working on a record publishing solution. If you want to release your music you pay amazon a number of dollars and send them the music. Amazon then sells your music as a CD from their store. You keep 40% of the profits.. And no more action is required from you. No accounting no taxes no record deal negotiations. (Though I would recommend scheming your way into getting more people to know about it) It apparently takes only 9 sells to break even. I don't know the details or if it's a good idea or whatever you'll have to figure that out yourself. It might be an alternative if the indy label doesn't work out.
I've heard the music you've so kindly shared. That's definitely good enough, I got really trippy on it. I never did hear the end of it (due to all the snoring). Only you should not call it "Deep relaxation session" call it: "Tokyo autumn rain". Write a little hype filled blurb about what binaural beats can do for a person. Add the glamor of spirituality to your album. People buy more than just bits of music, they buy a fantasy, they want that, and if you give it, then they will be satisfied. (As we say here, lick it till it shines) I'm a bit of a word smith. I'll gladly help if you want me to...
But take a break from improving your life. And use the time to do something you enjoy! I don't know you well but music might very well do. Also make sure to enjoy the suns warm rays with a beer in your hand at least once. (She IS a power source and we often underestimate her effects)
IF you manage to do what you enjoy and make enough to survive. THEN do more of the same...
Namaste