10-06-2009, 04:51 PM
I hope this is the right place to post this. I’m not trying to just share a personal experience, but to see if anyone has an opinion as to how I can use it as a learning experience because I don’t really understand it at all.
Lately I have been really enjoying the process of awakening. It is enlightening and pleasurable, and all the new little discoveries I make daily have brought me great comfort, but last night something happened that scared me a bit.
For a while I’ve been automatic writing, but all that comes out is weird symbols that neither I nor anyone I’ve shown them to can read. I’ve wondered if it’s just some sort of reflex because it seems sort of useless if no one can understand it, and I‘ve pretty much decided to not make too much of it.
Last night I was standing in the dark in my bathroom, seeing if I could see my aura (I’ve been practicing this lately with some success) and when I turned on the light, for a split second that writing seemed to be on the mirror in front of me. I haven’t looked at any of the stuff I’ve written lately and it wasn’t on my mind at all at the time, so I don’t think my brain just projected it there. What’s weirder, it seemed more complete, as if I’ve only been writing little parts of it. It was like seeing a 2-D image in 3-D for the first time, though it was still in 2-D if that makes any sense. I still had no idea what it was supposed to say, but I jumped and almost screamed. I wasn’t expecting that at all.
I thought maybe someone was trying to get a message through, so I sat in front of my altar and said “Okay, go ahead an show me.” What happened next is what really scared me. The only way that I can describe it is that reality seemed to bend and sway. Nothing seemed solid at all anymore, and this light seemed to be coming from everywhere. Everything seemed kind of jumbled up, like there was some other image superimposed over the room my eyes were seeing. I could see actual particles, the whole world was particles, and the “illusion” as it is often described as seemed very close to breaking completely.
I’ve already come to grips with the belief that life is a persistent illusion we use as a tool to learn,. I’m familiar with the concept that everything is made up of tiny vibrating particles, but this seemed to be over the top. I was afraid I was just going to slide out of reality and everything would stop existing. In spite of it being an illusion, I realize the importance this life has for me and I don’t want to lose my grip on it.
I was wondering if anyone else has had experiences like this, and how it can be used to grow instead of being a source of alarm. Am I maybe just getting too “out there” and I’m staring to lose my grip on what’s important? Is this message pointing towards something more or simply telling me I’m going too far? I still don’t get the writing at all, either. What could I benefit from something I can’t understand at all? I don’t know if it’s something I’m being “shown” or if it’s just images my brain has made trying to tell me something, but I don’t seem to be getting the message whatever the case.
Could anyone help me out here? I’m trying to get a grip and deal with this maturely, but any advice or insight would be GREATLY appreciated.
Lately I have been really enjoying the process of awakening. It is enlightening and pleasurable, and all the new little discoveries I make daily have brought me great comfort, but last night something happened that scared me a bit.
For a while I’ve been automatic writing, but all that comes out is weird symbols that neither I nor anyone I’ve shown them to can read. I’ve wondered if it’s just some sort of reflex because it seems sort of useless if no one can understand it, and I‘ve pretty much decided to not make too much of it.
Last night I was standing in the dark in my bathroom, seeing if I could see my aura (I’ve been practicing this lately with some success) and when I turned on the light, for a split second that writing seemed to be on the mirror in front of me. I haven’t looked at any of the stuff I’ve written lately and it wasn’t on my mind at all at the time, so I don’t think my brain just projected it there. What’s weirder, it seemed more complete, as if I’ve only been writing little parts of it. It was like seeing a 2-D image in 3-D for the first time, though it was still in 2-D if that makes any sense. I still had no idea what it was supposed to say, but I jumped and almost screamed. I wasn’t expecting that at all.
I thought maybe someone was trying to get a message through, so I sat in front of my altar and said “Okay, go ahead an show me.” What happened next is what really scared me. The only way that I can describe it is that reality seemed to bend and sway. Nothing seemed solid at all anymore, and this light seemed to be coming from everywhere. Everything seemed kind of jumbled up, like there was some other image superimposed over the room my eyes were seeing. I could see actual particles, the whole world was particles, and the “illusion” as it is often described as seemed very close to breaking completely.
I’ve already come to grips with the belief that life is a persistent illusion we use as a tool to learn,. I’m familiar with the concept that everything is made up of tiny vibrating particles, but this seemed to be over the top. I was afraid I was just going to slide out of reality and everything would stop existing. In spite of it being an illusion, I realize the importance this life has for me and I don’t want to lose my grip on it.
I was wondering if anyone else has had experiences like this, and how it can be used to grow instead of being a source of alarm. Am I maybe just getting too “out there” and I’m staring to lose my grip on what’s important? Is this message pointing towards something more or simply telling me I’m going too far? I still don’t get the writing at all, either. What could I benefit from something I can’t understand at all? I don’t know if it’s something I’m being “shown” or if it’s just images my brain has made trying to tell me something, but I don’t seem to be getting the message whatever the case.
Could anyone help me out here? I’m trying to get a grip and deal with this maturely, but any advice or insight would be GREATLY appreciated.