11-28-2009, 04:42 PM
(11-28-2009, 03:47 PM)ayadew Wrote: How can I be of service to her? My only idea is to restrict my personality, and remove the parts she dislikes while in her company.
I hope that I can ask a few questions that may be of use to you.
Removing parts of a personality: that's a tricky surgery, isn't it? A trait-ectomy? A qualities transplant? Ego fusion? Arthroscopy of the unconscious?
Rather than restricting your personality, have you asked her if there is a change in your behavior that would serve her? E.g., "I love to spend time with you and I can tell you aren't always comfortable around me. I'm sad about that because I'd like to get to spend more time with you. Is there something I could do more of or less of to help you enjoy time together with me? Or is this just not a good time in your life to spend as much time with me?"
Meanwhile, from a spiritual perspective, what do your meditation, prayer and mindfulness tell you about the sense of unworthiness or anxiety? Those are feelings that come up for you at the idea that this one particular person doesn't fully accept you. Why is that idea so emotionally important? Why is your acceptance and love of yourself, as a spark or facet of the One Creator, contingent on someone else having a particular point of view about you?