12-31-2009, 03:35 PM
I just had a really intense and negative dream experience a few minutes ago. It was so intense I cried in my dreams. Here's how it all started.
I had some time today so I decided to spend it reading some more Law of One materials. I read the LOO section again about calling on light/RA for help, and decided to give it a try. So as soon as I finished reading that section, I laid down on the bed, increased my energy levels and so called upon the light to bring me enlightenment.
After a while I fell asleep, and like many other afternoon naps, they often help to serve as a form of dream meditation for me. However this one was a bit different. This one was not peaceful at all... and I didn't eat or drink alcohol before bed so that shouldn't have affected my mind.
It was about me and some friends/family going to a big show that I invited them to. It all started with me judging another in the method of driving/doing something, and that negativity brought on more of it, and then a car accident occurred. Nobody got hurt but there was some financial damage to the car.
After that we continued on to a big show in which I invited them to. As I was preparing and trying to find the seats once we arrived there, I found out that I lost my glasses and my cell phone, which is very necessary and important to me. I felt disconnected from communication, lost, and my eye sight blurred. So I started to panick.
As the grand show was about to start, I slowly found out that everyone who I invited took the bus to leave and abandon me, despite the difficulty of the location. I stumbled around with the help of a single family member that remained with me, assisted me in finding my cell phone, my glasses, and even found more stuff that I lost/abandoned before... symbolized by pens and an old pair of glasses.
I kept trying to call the people that abandoned me for a long time, until finally I got through. At that point the negative emotion built up to such an intense degree that I was heart wrenchingly crying as I asked repeatedly why I was abandoned.
Then I awoke. And then I saw the dual reality.
I knew I was in trouble at that point, the negative emotions was so strong that I knew within a few seconds it was going to integrate into my non-dream mind. I quickly closed my eyes and imagined rushing myself into an "emotion/energy emergency room". I did the symbol of the cross on my heart, and I quickly thought of all the types of negative thoughts and emotions that occurred within the dream, and countered them each with accepting it, and also accepted the opposite of it.
I accepted my judgement in the beginning, and I also accepted free will/choice of every person.
I felt my heart was still stuck in a negative state, so I tried to feel unconditional love blossom from my heart. That took a while but eventually I had some limited success.
Then I went on to feel what negative emotion was still hitting me hard and accepted it and its opposite. I don't remember the details anymore, but the laptop was right beside my bed and active, so that I could share this story with everyone.
The experience I just had within 1 hours time was super intense, it punched and wrenched my heart... but now that I have balanced it, it feels much lighter than ever. It was sorta like a "life experience microwave dinner"
I'm glad I asked for this experience, but it was also scary in that it might have overwhelmed me and caused real negativity in my emotions. Sorta like requesting a bungee jump I suppose?
Thoughts or advice on this are very welcome!
I had some time today so I decided to spend it reading some more Law of One materials. I read the LOO section again about calling on light/RA for help, and decided to give it a try. So as soon as I finished reading that section, I laid down on the bed, increased my energy levels and so called upon the light to bring me enlightenment.
After a while I fell asleep, and like many other afternoon naps, they often help to serve as a form of dream meditation for me. However this one was a bit different. This one was not peaceful at all... and I didn't eat or drink alcohol before bed so that shouldn't have affected my mind.
It was about me and some friends/family going to a big show that I invited them to. It all started with me judging another in the method of driving/doing something, and that negativity brought on more of it, and then a car accident occurred. Nobody got hurt but there was some financial damage to the car.
After that we continued on to a big show in which I invited them to. As I was preparing and trying to find the seats once we arrived there, I found out that I lost my glasses and my cell phone, which is very necessary and important to me. I felt disconnected from communication, lost, and my eye sight blurred. So I started to panick.
As the grand show was about to start, I slowly found out that everyone who I invited took the bus to leave and abandon me, despite the difficulty of the location. I stumbled around with the help of a single family member that remained with me, assisted me in finding my cell phone, my glasses, and even found more stuff that I lost/abandoned before... symbolized by pens and an old pair of glasses.
I kept trying to call the people that abandoned me for a long time, until finally I got through. At that point the negative emotion built up to such an intense degree that I was heart wrenchingly crying as I asked repeatedly why I was abandoned.
Then I awoke. And then I saw the dual reality.
I knew I was in trouble at that point, the negative emotions was so strong that I knew within a few seconds it was going to integrate into my non-dream mind. I quickly closed my eyes and imagined rushing myself into an "emotion/energy emergency room". I did the symbol of the cross on my heart, and I quickly thought of all the types of negative thoughts and emotions that occurred within the dream, and countered them each with accepting it, and also accepted the opposite of it.
I accepted my judgement in the beginning, and I also accepted free will/choice of every person.
I felt my heart was still stuck in a negative state, so I tried to feel unconditional love blossom from my heart. That took a while but eventually I had some limited success.
Then I went on to feel what negative emotion was still hitting me hard and accepted it and its opposite. I don't remember the details anymore, but the laptop was right beside my bed and active, so that I could share this story with everyone.
The experience I just had within 1 hours time was super intense, it punched and wrenched my heart... but now that I have balanced it, it feels much lighter than ever. It was sorta like a "life experience microwave dinner"
I'm glad I asked for this experience, but it was also scary in that it might have overwhelmed me and caused real negativity in my emotions. Sorta like requesting a bungee jump I suppose?
Thoughts or advice on this are very welcome!