I has cancer
10-02-2017, 06:32 AM,
#1
I has cancer
So I got diagnosed with cancer last week. It is already the second diagnosis, I did not believe the first one because I was feeling so good and that all is well.
I am starting to believe the diagnosis now bc I have also seen the pics and yet still I feel good most of the time.
I was thinking, why ?
Well, I am feeling good because still all is well, no matter the cancer or whatever else. All is unfolding as it should.
I am in a state of euphoria, life is so intense, every day is different. I live in the moment and start talking to people if I feel like it. I don't even care anymore if I cross my aunt in the street (the one who hates me) And it is easier now to practice my spiritual stuff, it is like the cancer has made me less matter-oriented.
It reminds me a bit of the situation when my mum died, there are similarities plus many synchronicities are popping up.
All I can say I am so grateful!
(There are other days of course, I was really down on the weekend when I saw the kids, all of a sudden I was afraid of death and not seeing them grow up anymore.)
I recieved a sentence last week, it fell into my head "cancer is the ailment of kings."
I know this had to happen, but well I believe in fate and surrender anyways.
I want to share something that one of my non-duality teachers said "what if your attitude towards cancer was not one of fear and dread, but one of actually welcoming it? what would happen then?"
No matter what happens in your life, no matter what situation you are in, please don't start believing that it is bad, or that fate has dealt you an unfair hand.
It is not the situation that causes problems, it is our attitude.
That is the choice we always have.
Well after all, it is a ride, isn't it?
And no one survives it, anyways Tongue (that is what I told the doc when I asked what was the worst thing that could happen and he replied "you could die". I said "no one gets out of here alive")
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10-02-2017, 07:12 AM, (This post was last modified: 10-02-2017, 07:15 AM by Nía.)
#2
RE: I has cancer
Hi JayCee,

very sorry to hear about your diagnosis Confused - but very happy to read about your attitude towards it. Smile

In addition to how positive you're approaching the subject already, I just wanted to drop in two links that might be of some value to you: I started a thread about Healing cancer just yesterday that brought up some valuable information already; and you might want to sign up to the free The Truth About Cancer LIVE 2017 event, featuring 36 of the most renowned and respected health experts from around the world, a 3-day event, starting this coming Thursday, October 5th.

Lots of love,
-`ღ´-
Nía

Compassion, sensitivity, and an ability to empathize are helpful in avoiding the distortions of man-made intelligence and awareness.
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10-02-2017, 09:08 AM,
#3
RE: I has cancer
(10-02-2017, 06:32 AM)JayCee Wrote:  So I got diagnosed with cancer last week. It is already the second diagnosis, I did not believe the first one because I was feeling so good and that all is well.

I don't mean to be insensitive, but I'm genuinely curious. Why did you go to the doctor if you were feeling so well?

The magic is recognized; the nature is often not.
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10-02-2017, 09:47 AM,
#4
RE: I has cancer
(10-02-2017, 09:08 AM)anagogy Wrote:  
(10-02-2017, 06:32 AM)JayCee Wrote:  So I got diagnosed with cancer last week. It is already the second diagnosis, I did not believe the first one because I was feeling so good and that all is well.

I don't mean to be insensitive, but I'm genuinely curious. Why did you go to the doctor if you were feeling so well?

Lol, you have a point there! I had some wierd physical sensation, that is why I went. I still felt well, though.
Thanks for trying to help me cure the cancer Nia, but this is not about getting healed of cancer, though (I specifically did not post it in the health section).
It is rather the cancer helping me, by freeing me of attachments and fears.
It is another way of looking at things, that is all.
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10-02-2017, 10:19 AM,
#5
RE: I has cancer
Your attitude is an inspiration, JayCee. I wish you the best and will keep you in my thoughts.

Jeremy
It is not that love will tell you what to do.
It is that love will tell you how to do it with love.
Q'uo 3/19/06
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10-02-2017, 08:41 PM,
#6
RE: I has cancer
That's depressing.  Why does Cancer take away all the good people?

You should fight it (I say this because if I ever get Cancer someone better say it to me).  You should fight it just to try and live, to further enjoy it all.

Perhaps your fight can be one of pure acceptance of it, but I truly think if you're as happy as you are, then what more incentive, more fuel for reason, would you ever need to say 'I will not die just yet!'

Spread the joy, fight the sickness...  I'm sorry you have it too.  If you don't make it out, make sure to give God a hug.
To see a World in a Grain of Sand
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand
And Eternity in an hour
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Nía
10-02-2017, 09:00 PM, (This post was last modified: 10-02-2017, 09:05 PM by Elros.)
#7
RE: I has cancer
I don't know if you have an accurate understanding of the location of the cancer, but have you tried to contemplate it's energy in meditation? Dive into it.

Could be an old emotional distortion that "mutates" the body over time and which awaits to be released or processed.



I don't know if you searched through the Ra quotes about cancer but might be worthwhile.
http://www.lawofone.info/results.php?q=cancer

1st result :

Quote:46.15 Questioner: How does cancer do this learn/teaching when the entity has no conscious idea of what is happening to him when he develops cancer?

Ra: I am Ra. In many cases catalyst is not used.

If you treat the cancer as something within you that seeks to come out to the light to heal, I have all faith you will find to be well.

In the idea of infinity, acceptance of all the potentials the mind can think of is required for a balanced union with what is seen of infinity
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10-04-2017, 02:18 AM,
#8
RE: I has cancer
Thank you for sharing your heart with us JayCee, you are a beautiful light and a lovely love. No words that I say can express my actual feelings as I read your words.
You give so much strength to those around you shining that balanced light, truly. You are strong, and admirable.
I wish you to be one with your family again/as always.

"Everything comes from the sun."
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Glow
10-04-2017, 03:04 AM,
#9
RE: I has cancer
You can do it and win the thing. We all believe in you. By all, I mean the Creation.
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10-04-2017, 03:18 AM,
#10
RE: I has cancer
Thank you all, you are so lovely !
I love you. So much love. Incredible.
Someone said about fighting it.
I will not fight anything, let alone my own body. I have seen my father fight till his very last breath and it was not a good sight to behold, the way he died. When we fight something we have already lost. Remember that scene in the Matrix? Neo finally stopped fighting his alter ego Smith and that is when the change happened, when he finally realized that fighting was a waste of time.
And re meditating on the cancer, it is very obvious why it came.
I have been caring for my mama for the last three years to the point of totally forgetting about my own needs and cares.
And now I have breast cancer and the latin word for breast is mamma. The synchronicity is really blatant.
And please don't misunderstand me, I wlll get treatment, I already found a doctor whom I can trust (which is not easy for me because I am naturally suspicious of the medical establishment, haha)
A friend of mine said "maybe the good thing is, now you will lose your doctor phobia".
The good thing is - I now have to let other people care for me! because I am not used to that at all, I was always there for everyone else and taking care of them.
And now the way things unfold it is the other way round.
Re giving God a hug, that is lovely and made me smile. I have not been hugged so much in ages, like during those last days. And I know whenever I hug someone, I hug God also because he is in each and every one around me.
Another thing, I gained weight during the last year when things were already bad with my mum and I wasn't able to lose it. Now that is happening by itself because my body forces me to eat really healthy.
Because if i sip my wine in the evening like before and have chocolates I will sweat my heart out during the night. Now no more wine and it is nuts and herbal tea and I am fine. Even if I wanted wine, I just could not! it is not possible.
I already told my colleague "when I come back, watch out, I am a really obnoxious health nazi now" Tongue
I see you are all lovely people and want to help.
So as it is about me accepting help and you wanting to give I offer you the following:
if you feel like it and want to help, you could send me love and pray that no matter what happens, the situation will be for the best and highest good of all involved.
And that includes you, too, of course.
Heart
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10-04-2017, 03:38 AM,
#11
RE: I has cancer
I lost my mother to cancer.

I will pray for you, and everyone. Heart

"Everything comes from the sun."
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10-04-2017, 04:18 AM,
#12
RE: I has cancer
(10-04-2017, 03:18 AM)JayCee Wrote:  Thank you all, you are so lovely !
I love you. So much love. Incredible.
Someone said about fighting it.
I will not fight anything, let alone my own body. I have seen my father fight till his very last breath and it was not a good sight to behold, the way he died. When we fight something we have already lost. Remember that scene in the Matrix? Neo finally stopped fighting his alter ego Smith and that is when the change happened, when he finally realized that fighting was a waste of time.
And re meditating on the cancer, it is very obvious why it came.
I have been caring for my mama for the last three years to the point of totally forgetting about my own needs and cares.
And now I have breast cancer and the latin word for breast is mamma. The synchronicity is really blatant.
And please don't misunderstand me, I wlll get treatment, I already found a doctor whom I can trust (which is not easy for me because I am naturally suspicious of the medical establishment, haha)
A friend of mine said "maybe the good thing is, now you will lose your doctor phobia".
The good thing is - I now have to let other people care for me! because I am not used to that at all, I was always there for everyone else and taking care of them.
And now the way things unfold it is the other way round.
Re giving God a hug, that is lovely and made me smile. I have not been hugged so much in ages, like during those last days. And I know whenever I hug someone, I hug God also because he is in each and every one around me.
Another thing, I gained weight during the last year when things were already bad with my mum and I wasn't able to lose it. Now that is happening by itself because my body forces me to eat really healthy.
Because if i sip my wine in the evening like before and have chocolates I will sweat my heart out during the night. Now no more wine and it is nuts and herbal tea and I am fine. Even if I wanted wine, I just could not! it is not possible.
I already told my colleague "when I come back, watch out, I am a really obnoxious health nazi now"  Tongue
I see you are all lovely people and want to help.
So as it is about me accepting help and you wanting to give I offer you the following:
if you feel like it and want to help, you could send me love and pray that no matter what happens, the situation will be for the best and highest good of all involved.
And that includes you, too, of course.
Heart
Thank you such courage and inspiring words to share this, True acceptance births love. Its only the effort that counts.

"if you feel like it and want to help, you could send me love and pray that no matter what happens, the situation will be for the best and highest good of all involved."
I appreciate this opportunity, I will do.
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Glow
10-04-2017, 05:41 AM,
#13
RE: I has cancer
(10-04-2017, 03:18 AM)JayCee Wrote:  So as it is about me accepting help and you wanting to give I offer you the following:
if you feel like it and want to help, you could send me love and pray that no matter what happens, the situation will be for the best and highest good of all involved.
And that includes you, too, of course.
Heart

Thank you, JayCee. Heart

You're reminding me of another guy who healed his cancer with a similar attitude, Scott Binder, whom I read a German article about last year. Smile

Lots of love!
-`ღ´-

Compassion, sensitivity, and an ability to empathize are helpful in avoiding the distortions of man-made intelligence and awareness.
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Glow
10-04-2017, 08:27 PM,
#14
RE: I has cancer
Hey JayCee, it wasn't nice to read this thread about your diagnosis, but your words and approach is so inspiring. You inspired me, thanks for that :-) Much love to you, dear friend!
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isis
10-04-2017, 09:17 PM,
#15
RE: I has cancer
HI JayCee,
I'm sorry to hear of you colision with catylist but sounds like you are using it beautifully.

I've recently come to know a fellow with stage 4 lung cancer. He's had treatments that put most people out of commission but he looks so well and his treatment has surprisingly shrunk his tumour which I didn't think happened in stage 4.

Either way it's his attitude and approach that seems so healing to him and other, sounds like you are brimming with those same vibes. Well done and good teaching so thank you from all who witness your example. Love to you. (((Hugs)))
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10-05-2017, 10:17 AM, (This post was last modified: 10-05-2017, 10:24 AM by Stranger.)
#16
RE: I has cancer
Like Glow, I have also met someone with stage 4 cancer who was convinced that his cancer had to do with unresolved catalyst. He therefore dedicated time each morning to meditate and work his way through any past emotional issues that he was carrying, using a simple technique called EFT the core of which is simply allowing unresolved issues to come up, and meeting them with acceptance - just as I posted about recently.

Of course, he also got chemotherapy, radiation, etc.

His tumors are gone and only scars remain; he's been told by doctors it's a miracle and his friends are asking him how he did it and how he is so exceptionally happy; in fact he is far happier now than he was before developing cancer.
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10-05-2017, 03:25 PM, (This post was last modified: 10-05-2017, 03:26 PM by Cainite.)
#17
RE: I has cancer
All I can say is that you're very strong.
And you have our love.
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10-05-2017, 11:05 PM,
#18
RE: I has cancer
I wish you the best.
_______________________________________________
Evolving.
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10-06-2017, 03:07 AM,
#19
RE: I has cancer
Thank you all for your support, as always!
You are lovely.
I want to talk about some energy symptoms that are happening lately.
As I already mentioned, for about the last two weeks I am eating very light food and little food, compared to before (I am not so hungry and it comes naturally)
And I have those states of almost spiritual ecstasy where I am so filled with love and awe and in tears, overflowing with grace and gratitude.
Afterwards or rather, the next day, it is often some sort of backlash, where the mind is extremely active and tries to insinuate what might happen, etc. and I am very agitated and cannot find sleep, despite being really tired (yesterday was a really wacky day energetically, probably accentuated by the full moon and the wind storm ). And then after that, when the mind sort of has shot all of its arrows, there comes a period of relative calm (that is the state I am in now)
Has anyone experienced similar?
My own interpretation is that it is the mind or ego that wants to regain control because it feels threatened by spiritual high-vibrational states.
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10-06-2017, 06:00 AM,
#20
RE: I has cancer
(10-06-2017, 03:07 AM)JayCee Wrote:  Thank you all for your support, as always!
You are lovely.
I want to talk about some energy symptoms that are happening lately.
As I already mentioned, for about the last two weeks I am eating very light food and little food, compared to before (I am not so hungry and it comes naturally)
And I have those states of almost spiritual ecstasy where I am so filled with love and awe and in tears, overflowing with grace and gratitude.
Afterwards or rather, the next day, it is often some sort of backlash, where the mind is extremely active and tries to insinuate what might happen, etc. and I am very agitated and cannot find sleep, despite being really tired (yesterday was a really wacky day energetically, probably accentuated by the full moon and the wind storm ). And then after that, when the mind sort of has shot all of its arrows, there comes a period of relative calm (that is the state I am in now)
Has anyone experienced similar?
My own interpretation is that it is the mind or ego that wants to regain control because it feels threatened by spiritual high-vibrational states.
Thank you for letting me support.
Yes i know what you mean just let the body feel what it wants and let mind comment how it wannts on these states while you step back. There is much greater peace beyond the two, the up or down both are two sides of same coin.. 
2 things come to mind, the observer observing the observer.. or 3 statues of buddha- statue of buddha mad  -confronting ego self , the happy/laughing buddha feeling such bliss then the serene buddha moving beyond the two- of course its not linear you can cyle between each one.
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rva_jeremy
10-10-2017, 05:22 AM,
#21
RE: I has cancer
Thank you infinitely Quan, that was profound!
Is there a buddha angry at silicone implants also? Tongue
I will be operated in two weeks on both breasts, I got the final results yesterday about cancer. But I was really getting angry when the doc mentioned silicone implants as a possibility (because not much will remain of the breasts).
I tried to argue it is artificial stuff that they put into the body but he said they are no problem and could even remain for a lifetime inside.
God I feel my distrust of doctors returning and god, silicone!
on the other hand, if everything is god, then god is also inside silicone implants.
And I am being struck again how the symbolism behind this is so blatant -
the breasts are the moon, astrologically speaking and also the mother. The moon in my birthchart is afflicted by rather heavy aspects, my mother had the same constellation and even the wife that my brother married has it!
It is said that one day those constellations that keep repeating in families have to be resolved.
Someone has to do it.
So the moon is also the ocean right? The tide rises and retreats according to the moon. Ever since I got this diagnosis I have been thinking I should travel to the sea and symbolically give my breasts over to the ocean, before they go the way of all flesh.
And they will operate in a clinic that is called Helios.
Helios the sun god.
I will sacrifice my breasts on the altar of the sun, the sun will eclipse the moon.
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10-12-2017, 04:41 AM, (This post was last modified: 10-12-2017, 04:44 AM by Quan.)
#22
RE: I has cancer
(10-10-2017, 05:22 AM)JayCee Wrote:  Thank you infinitely Quan, that was profound!
Is there a buddha angry at silicone implants also?  Tongue
I will be operated in two weeks on both breasts, I got the final results yesterday about cancer. But I was really getting angry when the doc mentioned silicone implants as a possibility (because not much will remain of the breasts).
I tried to argue it is artificial stuff that they put into the body but he said they are no problem and could even remain for a lifetime inside.
God I feel my distrust of doctors returning and god, silicone!
on the other hand, if everything is god, then god is also inside silicone implants.
And I am being struck again how the symbolism behind this is so blatant -
the breasts are the moon, astrologically speaking and also the mother. The moon in my birthchart is afflicted by rather heavy aspects, my mother had the same constellation and even the wife that my brother married has it!
It is said that one day those constellations that keep repeating in families have to be resolved.
Someone has to do it.
So the moon is also the ocean right? The tide rises and retreats according to the moon. Ever since I got this diagnosis I have been thinking I should travel to the sea and symbolically give my breasts over to the ocean, before they go the way of all flesh.
And they will operate in a clinic that is called Helios.
Helios the sun god.
I will sacrifice my breasts on the altar of the sun, the sun will eclipse the moon.
That is fine Im glad it came out right then. Thought it didnt make much sense!
We all are buddha self within, or Jesus , christ consiousness or whatever to calll it so given that if you are fine with then its okay Big Grin   My blessings go to you with the operation of course hope all goes well I do have to say though   I couldnt help but laugh reading your post
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10-12-2017, 05:22 AM,
#23
RE: I has cancer
(10-12-2017, 04:41 AM)Quan Wrote:  
(10-10-2017, 05:22 AM)JayCee Wrote:  Thank you infinitely Quan, that was profound!
Is there a buddha angry at silicone implants also?  Tongue
I will be operated in two weeks on both breasts, I got the final results yesterday about cancer. But I was really getting angry when the doc mentioned silicone implants as a possibility (because not much will remain of the breasts).
I tried to argue it is artificial stuff that they put into the body but he said they are no problem and could even remain for a lifetime inside.
God I feel my distrust of doctors returning and god, silicone!
on the other hand, if everything is god, then god is also inside silicone implants.
And I am being struck again how the symbolism behind this is so blatant -
the breasts are the moon, astrologically speaking and also the mother. The moon in my birthchart is afflicted by rather heavy aspects, my mother had the same constellation and even the wife that my brother married has it!
It is said that one day those constellations that keep repeating in families have to be resolved.
Someone has to do it.
So the moon is also the ocean right? The tide rises and retreats according to the moon. Ever since I got this diagnosis I have been thinking I should travel to the sea and symbolically give my breasts over to the ocean, before they go the way of all flesh.
And they will operate in a clinic that is called Helios.
Helios the sun god.
I will sacrifice my breasts on the altar of the sun, the sun will eclipse the moon.
That is fine Im glad it came out right then. Thought it didnt make much sense!
We all are buddha self within, or Jesus , christ consiousness or whatever to calll it so given that if you are fine with then its okay Big Grin   My blessings go to you with the operation of course hope all goes well I do have to say though   I couldnt help but laugh reading your post

The best things are the ones that do not make sense, haha!
I really felt like in some wierd movie, when the doctor put out the box with the silicone things to let me look at them and touch them.
you know, I prefer to be a lovely bio-degradable corpse when I die, not one with plastic parts that won't rot at all. It is good if my posts make you laugh, I was already worrying it might sound depressing and gloomy what with sacrificing breasts to the sun Confused
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10-12-2017, 07:04 AM,
#24
RE: I has cancer
(10-12-2017, 05:22 AM)JayCee Wrote:  The best things are the ones that do not make sense, haha!
I really felt like in some wierd movie, when the doctor put out the box with the silicone things to let me look at them and touch them.
you know, I prefer to be a lovely bio-degradable corpse when I die, not one with plastic parts that won't rot at all. It is good if my posts make you laugh, I was already worrying it might sound depressing and gloomy what with sacrificing breasts to the sun  Confused

Cool.. I've also been in situations that felt like being in a movie. they made me feel alive! not bored at all, unusually perceptive, ...
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Quan
10-13-2017, 06:48 AM,
#25
RE: I has cancer
(10-12-2017, 05:22 AM)JayCee Wrote:  
(10-12-2017, 04:41 AM)Quan Wrote:  
(10-10-2017, 05:22 AM)JayCee Wrote:  Thank you infinitely Quan, that was profound!
Is there a buddha angry at silicone implants also?  Tongue
I will be operated in two weeks on both breasts, I got the final results yesterday about cancer. But I was really getting angry when the doc mentioned silicone implants as a possibility (because not much will remain of the breasts).
I tried to argue it is artificial stuff that they put into the body but he said they are no problem and could even remain for a lifetime inside.
God I feel my distrust of doctors returning and god, silicone!
on the other hand, if everything is god, then god is also inside silicone implants.
And I am being struck again how the symbolism behind this is so blatant -
the breasts are the moon, astrologically speaking and also the mother. The moon in my birthchart is afflicted by rather heavy aspects, my mother had the same constellation and even the wife that my brother married has it!
It is said that one day those constellations that keep repeating in families have to be resolved.
Someone has to do it.
So the moon is also the ocean right? The tide rises and retreats according to the moon. Ever since I got this diagnosis I have been thinking I should travel to the sea and symbolically give my breasts over to the ocean, before they go the way of all flesh.
And they will operate in a clinic that is called Helios.
Helios the sun god.
I will sacrifice my breasts on the altar of the sun, the sun will eclipse the moon.
That is fine Im glad it came out right then. Thought it didnt make much sense!
We all are buddha self within, or Jesus , christ consiousness or whatever to calll it so given that if you are fine with then its okay Big Grin   My blessings go to you with the operation of course hope all goes well I do have to say though   I couldnt help but laugh reading your post

The best things are the ones that do not make sense, haha!
I really felt like in some wierd movie, when the doctor put out the box with the silicone things to let me look at them and touch them.
you know, I prefer to be a lovely bio-degradable corpse when I die, not one with plastic parts that won't rot at all. It is good if my posts make you laugh, I was already worrying it might sound depressing and gloomy what with sacrificing breasts to the sun  Confused
Haha you worry about sounding depressing I did about lack of empathy. Speaking from heart defies logic i definitly tried that path when younger its no fun  Big Grin  Once again very funny post!   Sacrificing beasts to the sun. The comedian of the forum perhaps.     Before I awakened spiritul i first felt life was a movie .. when a kid like being on a stage.. not ina narcistic way more in a playful way!
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10-13-2017, 07:22 PM,
#26
RE: I has cancer
JayCee, have you gotten a chance to look at Nia's thread about healing cancer?

I'm curious as to your thoughts on that thread, which is basically about the Ra material's statements concerning the origins and healing of cancer, and if you found those statements useful or effective.

Service to Others means Service to All. That includes yourself.
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10-14-2017, 02:53 PM, (This post was last modified: 10-14-2017, 03:24 PM by JayCee.)
#27
RE: I has cancer
"Sacrificing beasts", haha Quan! nice Freudian slip.
You know what I think you were able to laugh at the post, because you subconsciously felt that there was no reason to feel sorry me. I mean, if I had written something like omg I will lose my beasts (oops breasts Tongue ) and so I will go down to the river right now and drown myself bc life sucks anyways, I suppose you would not have laughed (or would you Tongue), and instead given me words of help or something.
Xise I have skimmed it before I started posting this thread, but as I said my focus is not primarily on healing right now but more on benefitting from this. I guess it might sound strange but I have absolutely no reason to get rid of the cancer as soon as possible because life is so intense right now, my spirituality has been boosted immensely, I have been able to do stuff I had not been able before ( like switch to healthy eating, it just happens by itself), I am on sick leave (and will be for some time) so that is awesome also bcause it gives me all the time in the world to practice, etc.
There is a strong sense of fate in all this and that this was meant and necessary to happen.
You know I am one of those lazy people, and if there is nothing happening in my life and I think this will go on forever I don't practice my sadhana because , well, "tomorrow" is another day.
But right now I don't know how many tomorrows there will be and it helps me tremendously to be in the moment and live every day like "carpe diem", you know. I am immensely grateful for everything and also for this illness.
I know if I were healed tomorrow there is a possibility I would go back to sitting on the couch, eating chocolates and watching silly soap operas.
I feel that cancer is probably one of the least predictable illnesses and also varies a great deal from individual to individual, like what will help one person will not help another etc.
That is probably also what makes it so interesting. There are people who have done everything "right", have lived very healthy lives and yet get some of the most dastardly cancers. Some of the great sages had cancer, like Ramana Maharshi and Nisagadatta Maharaj.
Other people spend their days chainsmoking and drinking wine and die one day peacefully in their beds.
Some get healed through chemotherapy, others don't. Some are given up by doctors and go home to die and yet recover.
Some get healed at first and then cancer returns a lot stronger and they die.
All the statistics in my mind signify absolutely nothing. As I think it is destiny if it happens, it is part of what was planned.
As Ramana said "if something is supposed to happen, no matter what you do and try to prevent it, you won't be able to, it will happen anyway"
And in that sense, if I or anyone else is supposed to be healed of cancer, it will happen, regardless of the treatment they follow.
My 3year old nephew told me today that he loves me, and that if any time soon I won't have breasts anymore, he will get them because he is me after all.
Isn't that the cutest thing ever?
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10-17-2017, 04:34 AM, (This post was last modified: 10-17-2017, 04:43 AM by Quan.)
#28
RE: I has cancer
(10-14-2017, 02:53 PM)JayCee Wrote:  "Sacrificing beasts", haha Quan! nice Freudian slip.
You know what I think you were able to laugh at the post, because you subconsciously felt that there was no reason to feel sorry me. I mean, if I had written something like omg I will lose my beasts (oops breasts Tongue ) and so I will go down to the river right now and drown myself bc life sucks anyways, I suppose you would not have laughed (or would you Tongue), and instead given me words of  help or something.
Xise I have skimmed it before I started posting this thread, but as I said my focus is not primarily on healing right now but more on benefitting from this. I guess it might sound strange but I have absolutely no reason to get rid of the cancer as soon as possible because life is so intense right now, my spirituality has been boosted immensely, I have been able to do stuff I had not been able before ( like switch to healthy eating, it just happens by itself), I am on sick leave (and will be for some time) so that is awesome also bcause it gives me all the time in the world to practice, etc.
There is a strong sense of fate in all this and that this was meant and necessary to happen.
You know I am one of those lazy people, and if there is nothing happening in my life and I think this will go on forever I don't practice my sadhana because , well, "tomorrow" is another day.
But right now I don't know how many tomorrows there will be and it helps me tremendously to be in the moment and live every day like "carpe diem", you know. I am immensely grateful for everything and also for this illness.
I know if I were healed tomorrow there is a possibility I would go back to sitting on the couch, eating chocolates and watching silly soap operas.
I feel that cancer is probably one of the least predictable illnesses and also varies a great deal from individual to individual, like what will help one person will not help another etc.
That is probably also what makes it so interesting. There are people who have done everything "right", have lived very healthy lives and yet get some of the most dastardly cancers. Some of the great sages had cancer, like Ramana Maharshi and Nisagadatta Maharaj.
Other people spend their days chainsmoking and drinking wine and die one day peacefully in their beds.
Some get healed through chemotherapy, others don't. Some are given up by doctors and go home to die and yet recover.
Some get healed at first and then cancer returns a lot stronger and they die.
All the statistics in my mind signify absolutely nothing. As I think it is destiny if it happens, it is part of what was planned.
As Ramana said "if something is supposed to happen, no matter what you do and try to prevent it, you won't be able to, it will happen anyway"
And in that sense, if I or anyone else is supposed to be healed of cancer, it will happen, regardless of the treatment they follow.
My 3year old nephew told me today that he loves me, and that if any time soon I won't have breasts anymore, he will get them because he is me after all.
Isn't that the cutest thing ever?

Lol ooops the freudian slip, I remember seeing the words beasts clearly i actually was suprised when you pointed it out and I looked back that is wasnt!    With what your saying yes a lot of sages have had cancer in biographies I have read and come across
I was hesistate to share this been contemplating past few days but i feel i should from synchronisicity of another post that confirmed it.  Something that happend in the past qutie a few years agos..  A close family friend I have known all life, allowed cancer to happen to her.. Where it gets interesting was i felt I should pray a lot for her before this happened after finding she did not have much time left, I never reallly prayt in past thinking why would it help! But I did want to now a real compulsion to do it. Usually by my self, a few times with some famly(which I never did before with them so was a big thing for me).   Further down the track in time, one night I was sleeping then I had this profound dream/vision she appeared to me as her younger self in a sort of portal like a window everything outside of it black but in this circile she was there and another world seemed there to, infinite peace to it..   and she didnt tlak in words more through an understanding.. but said that  she was really thank full for the praying it meant so much to her and helped a lot, I felt a tremendous gratitude. WHich I remeber being suprised as I didnt know if praying had any effect when doing it. She told me she wanted the cancer to happen, that this life was only a speck of sand on a beach to who she really was and all lives she had. Basically everything was fine and perfect for her now. Lastly sHe needed it to happen to open to love, not just for her but for her family too. Her husband was a stressed type of corporate guy, now after he lives on a farm now very at ease and peacefull much different to who was was.  Her to children, adults are very loving people both in relations with really caring partners.
After the vision/dreamI woke up in a state of shock almost, lots of sweating, adrenaline rushing and it was late at night it took a lot for me to calm down.  I never felt that way before very strange. I saw the time and remembered it.    The next day around lunch time I found out from mum that the family friend has gone back home again, left her body.  It was the same time I had the vision. Before my mum told me I knew and was not suprised at all that she would tell me this. It was such in inspring event for me, the lightening card in tarot that potentiates the spirit and praying I have a lot of faith in now, especially reading what Carla has talked, she was big on praying I am too now.  I couldnt be more thankful for the gift of tha tvision and what family friend she gave to me and how much it has helped me spiritual whenever faith is lacking.
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10-19-2017, 03:30 AM,
#29
RE: I has cancer
Thanks, love, that story made my cry. Lovely.
Yes prayer is very strong, one of the palliative care nurses told me of a situation where relatives were standing around the death bed of someone close to them, and praying for that person to recover. The nurse (who apparently was having the "sight") told them to please stop it because it was time for that person to go and they only made it harder for the dying to let go.
Nice synchronicity btw because I have been thinking about death especially this week. On monday it was 7 month and 7 days since my mother died and I put out the bed linens she died in (never dared that before, they are lovely though with roses) and put them on the bed.
I have a slight cold and it manifested already the day before with wierd burps, like the throat was trying to free itself.
This happened for the first time in 2016, when I had my burnout and contracted the flu from my mum who was hospitalized. I have never felt so low like during that time, I literally had no energy left and I remember one night I was lying in bed, and the throat was acting all frantic and i just said "Lord if I die now no problem, at least I won't have to suffer anymore"
So those symptoms came up again on monday. So I laid down and I said "ok I am going to die now" (I wanted to pull a "Ramana", you know he had a panic attack and then thought he was going to die and pretended to, and it was the death of the ego he experienced)
So I lie there, burping my heart out and then I had to get up and actually vomit some slimy stuff, the body was trying to get rid of (and during the day I had already had lots of bowel movements so I remembered "oh wow ,that is like with mum before she died", it was the same, body is trying to cleanse itself)
I did that for three times and then the vomiting stopped.
But no death esperience either Confused Tongue
I just went to sleep and the wierd burps have not reoccurred (well it was the death of the burpety burps then, haha)
So what do we learn from that?
we cannot force some experience, it will happen when it is supposed to (ready when YOU are, I guess)
Another synchronicity, my friend lent me her big bag to take with me to hospital and the bag says "Styx".
That is one of the rivers in the greek underworld.
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10-19-2017, 04:34 AM, (This post was last modified: 10-19-2017, 04:38 AM by Quan.)
#30
RE: I has cancer
(10-19-2017, 03:30 AM)JayCee Wrote:  Thanks, love, that story made my cry. Lovely.
Yes prayer is very strong, one of the palliative care nurses told me of a situation where relatives were standing around the death bed of someone close to them, and praying for that person to recover. The nurse (who apparently was having the "sight") told them to please stop it because it was time for that person to go and they only made it harder for the dying to let go.
Nice synchronicity btw because I have been thinking about death especially this week. On monday it was 7 month and 7 days since my mother died and I put out the bed linens she died in (never dared that before, they are lovely though with roses) and put them on the bed.
I have a slight cold and it manifested already the day before with wierd burps, like the throat was trying to free itself.
This happened for the first time in 2016, when I had my burnout and contracted the flu from my mum who was hospitalized. I have never felt so low like during that time, I literally had no energy left and I remember one night I was lying in bed, and the throat was acting all frantic and i just said "Lord if I die now no problem, at least I won't have to suffer anymore"
So those symptoms came up again on monday. So I laid down and I said "ok I am going to die now" (I wanted to pull a "Ramana", you know he had a panic attack and then thought he was going to die and pretended to, and it was the death of the ego he experienced)
So I lie there, burping my heart out and then I had to get up and actually vomit some slimy stuff, the body was trying to get rid of (and during the day I had already had lots of bowel movements so I remembered "oh wow ,that is like with mum before she died", it was the same, body is trying to cleanse itself)
I did that for three times and then the vomiting stopped.
But no death esperience either  Confused   Tongue
I just went to sleep and the wierd burps have not reoccurred (well it was the death of the burpety burps then, haha)
So what do we learn from that?
we cannot force some experience, it will happen when it is supposed to (ready when YOU are, I guess)
Another synchronicity, my friend lent me her big bag to take with me to hospital and the bag says "Styx".
That is one of the rivers in the greek underworld.
That is good you like the story, I really have wanted to share with her family too but heart hasnt felt right to hopefully one day it will ive only have with a handfull of people, well until this forum Tongue
Haha thats funny about the prayer and nurse told them to stop it. Reminds me of myself actually! my pet guinea pig passed on recently at first I was praying so much for her to stay as I was distraught for her to be healed and sad kept holding her near my face and kissing her. So much emotion crying so loud praying so much. Eventually I thought no I cant be selfish if its her time maybe she is ready to be human or go back to being human so I changed the prayer to instead just be on love to take care of her in the transition and gratitude.    LIke what buddhist monks do to guide the way that type of concept.  as the sadness can hold them back. Now instead being grateful, and knowing that there is a greater purpose. WOuld she want me to be this bubbling mess before she left no of course not just to be full of love to show gratutude and love for her. I kept balancing any sadness with those thoughts and kept focus on her not my silly grief.  It was a very empowering experience ive grown so much from that, another catlyst of the spirit.
Synchronicity galore, Styx you mention ive just started reading a ancient greek type novel Odysesseus and where I live been so much talk as governemnt is having a marathon seating to decide to have euthanasia  or other end of debate have more funding for palliative care.
I will pray for you whenever  comes to mind to be surrounded/filled with love Angel Its more for me to be thankful just to have opportunity.     Yes exactly cannot force some experience, I had a veyr near death experience this year after praying a lot (I i cant recall what) eventually I did jus as you said ok i am ready to die if its my time let it be and just rested in that in a positive empty way, but I didnt i got through it.
Thats interesting on Ramana, I didnt know about that experience. I have read a lot on different Indian gurus and there biographies maybe one on him will be good if available, well if heart permits that is I will wait for the green light. Ha thats a traffic light analogy, nice irony there Wink
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