How to get around delusions

[AnthroHeart]

I suffer from delusions of grandeur, which feeds my schizophrenia. A lot of the Law of One is fantastic. But I can't get past the thought that higher densities, and the universe being conscious, and Logoi, are all topics of grandeur. So I find it hard to believe in them, because they will feed my schizophrenia. How can I enjoy the Law of One while still remaining sane, and grounded? How can I believe in higher densities that are more harmonious? I'm seeking help here. It's hard to talk with my therapist about such things. How can I believe that in some density/dimension, even anthros are real, and that there is a density of Light?

[bosphorus]

I suffer from delusions of grandeur, which feeds my schizophrenia. A lot of the Law of One is fantastic. But I can't get past the thought that higher densities, and the universe being conscious, and Logoi, are all topics of grandeur. So I find it hard to believe in them, because they will feed my schizophrenia. How can I enjoy the Law of One while still remaining sane, and grounded? How can I believe in higher densities that are more harmonious? I'm seeking help here. It's hard to talk with my therapist about such things. How can I believe that in some density/dimension, even anthros are real, and that there is a density of Light?

dear gemini,
first of all take responsibility for your disease. Since you create it at some consciousness level. say to yourself " i'm taking responsibility of my creation" and "i have created it". These will help you a big deal.

i'd love to help you much more however at least just don't want to do any harm.

take care

ps: www.ptaah.com is a good source

[AnthroHeart]

Yes, I have taken responsibility for it, and all the things I do on it, including any faults.

[reeay]

It's possible to stay grounded by focusing on the more practical aspects within the Ra material, e.g., energy centers, balancing, the laws, etc.,. Those things that pertain to everyday life and our development to becoming balanced beings, or to know self more…

[AnthroHeart]

I once thought I had traveled through a wormhole and was in a new Universe, and had become Creator. I was looking forward to creating stars and hanging out with other Creators. That was a delusion.

But the basic tenants of the Law of One, I can definitely focus on them. Or just not worry at all about it.

[reeay]

Perhaps it was a 'delusion' bc your lower rays were not balanced enough to support those experiences that use higher rays? Grounding kind of means working with those foundational rays red, orange, yellow. Just putting ideas out there!

[AnthroHeart]

Yeah, it seems like my lower rays are not ever balanced. At least it doesn't feel like I'm going to hell any longer.

[Unbound]

I think for you it may be useful to make a distinct discernment between your physical self as you experience here and the Creator that is the core of your consciousness. There is nothing wrong with exploring with your consciousness, but everything needs context and so your body needs context too. These kinds of visions and experiences do a lot to open and initiate the mind, but I feel you maybe need to work on seeing the divine within your own body. Just some thoughts aha

[AnthroHeart]

I could definitely use seeing the divine within myself. That is fantastical thinking. Anything fantastic I used to think would distract me from being able to live an ordinary life. But I want the fantastic in my life. I don't want a boring life. But I don't want to fall victim to the voices that I've heard in the past. There's enough in life to keep me busy. But I don't enjoy being busy. I'd rather be doing nothing at all. Maybe listen to music and watch furry videos are two things I enjoy doing.

I like your idea Tanner about seeing the divine within me. I am worthy.

[Charles]

Gemini, That One Creator created everything. Everything includes you and me, and everyone and everything on this planet, including the planet itself.

I am not God, and neither are you, but we, each of us, are children of That One, and contain a spark of That One.

This knowledge could, and perhaps should, help each of us realize that we can use that spark, to help us to see and think clearly. You Have That Ability Within You, and that is cause for celebration.

As a child of That One, you have within you the energy and wisdom to realize that this ordinary life has it’s purpose. Perhaps your soul growth purpose is to use that spark, to help you to discern between fantastic illusion and remarkable truth.

One truth is to realize that living an ordinary life, is a remarkable opportunity.

That spark can help you to realize that it is remarkable for your immortal soul to temporarily experience life in mortal body.

It’s wonderful to realize that it is remarkable, and within your ability, to live a life lived with an awareness of That One’s quiet and loving peace within you.

You are known and you are loved, and that is fantastic.

[xise]

Could you describe and detail one of your delusions of grandeur episodes, particularly in what your train of thought was moment to moment? Delusions of grandeur is quite a nebulous term.

[AnthroHeart]

One of the delusions of grandeur is when I asked Ra to "please kill me, bring me back home" when I thought home was in the sun. My experience after that was traveling along the surface of the sun in another body. I thought for sure I was dead, and I was thanking Ra for the experience I was having. I wished I had really died, but I don't think Ra is in the business of killing people just because they ask. I asked because I was incredibly weary from so much spiritual seeking and needed a rest.

Other delusions of grandeur is when I thought God was talking to me, and asking me to save the Universe.

Charles, thank you for the info that ordinary life is fantastic. That we can live a mortal life with all its limitations. And that is fantastic. Sometimes it's hard to see that.

[xise]

One of the delusions of grandeur is when I asked Ra to "please kill me, bring me back home" when I thought home was in the sun. My experience after that was traveling along the surface of the sun in another body. I thought for sure I was dead, and I was thanking Ra for the experience I was having. I wished I had really died, but I don't think Ra is in the business of killing people just because they ask. I asked because I was incredibly weary from so much spiritual seeking and needed a rest.

Other delusions of grandeur is when I thought God was talking to me, and asking me to save the Universe.

Charles, thank you for the info that ordinary life is fantastic. That we can live a mortal life with all its limitations. And that is fantastic. Sometimes it's hard to see that.

When you say that God was talking to you, could you share some more details?

[AnthroHeart]

I got thought hallucinations that I thought were coming from God, but I never asked if he was God or who he was.

I just said to him "when you're made out of unconditional love, anything is possible"

I kept trying to create the world of anthros that I desired by creating them in my mind, and hoping to shift the Earth to that reality. I thought this God would help me do that. I kept turning it over to him after I finished doing pieces that I thought I should do.

I know how that God wasn't talking to me. At the time I thought he was, because he was so positive for the most part.
Until he told me to kill my dog to save the Universe. And that I've been over before. I think it was a negative being posing as God. Right now I'm not sure if I believe in a God, because of my condition. Even though I wanted to experience this before I came into this life. I wanted to experience schizophrenia. But in this life it's no fun. My life feels like a big mess. But it could always be worse. At least I'm still alive and have my sight. And my dog wasn't taken away from me, so that's good.

I can't really go much more into it. I was tricked, maybe by my own dark side.

[xise]

One thing I can share GW, is what I think when I decide I don't wish to follow the suggestion of my guides:

1) I remind myself there really is no right and wrong, and free will is paramount. I do what I want.

2) I remind myself there is always the chance my guidance was hijacked for this particular instance and I didn't realize it.

3) Love is unconditional. I can do the thing that my guidance suggests is not smart, and my guidance, the universe and I will still love myself. I am the Creator, I can't do wrong. I trust my own self enough to know that I intend well and I can learn from missteps.

4) Blindly following someone else's advice is to follow in the footsteps of a STS power pyramid. Making my own choices, and learning from my missteps (thanks Jeremy ) and becoming a more wise individual, is better than following someone's advice and making the right step. You remove your own power when you believe you can't make a good decision (as well as diminishing your own self-acceptance) and follow someone else for those reasons.

5) So at the end of the day, even if it was proven the universe wanted me to do something and the message wasn't hijacked, I do what I want. I trust myself enough to know that its ok to make missteps and learn, rather to do something else suggested and not truly learn for myself to make decisions. And a truly loving universe understands this, and it respects free will.

So I've thought about the scenario, you know in some bible story, where God asks me to kill someone or something to prove something. I'll say no, knowing even if its a misstep, I will still love myself, and the unconditional love of God will still be with me.

p.s. I personally like using the word "universe" or "creator", because I think God has been used enough in grossly distorted or negatively polarized ways that it no longer carries an unconditional vibration of love, for me at least. This is probably a language association thing though.

[AnthroHeart]

I'm the same as you in that regard xise. The word God doesn't carry unconditional love. It reeks of judgment. I too prefer Creator. Though they are different "beings." God told me his name was Jehovah. That's the war god of the bible.

[Charles]

The question asked, at the start of this thread was: How to get around delusions.

I am not schizophrenic, so I don’t really know how to answer that, though I do plan to try.

All of us here who have responded to your question, are doing our best to help you, and to do no harm.

But realize that we are not professionals.
And you are also encouraged to remember that we are each approaching you with less than complete or perfect enlightenment.

You are under No obligation to share the details of your audible thought hallucinations, especially if any such recall causes you any sorrow or worry or upset. Do only what You Feel is Best For You.

You know of your schizophrenia, and that is good news. That is your conscious Self being aware of the problem. I think that remaining conscious is your best defense, so I’ll tell you how I manage that.

I define myself as an immortal soul, temporally living in a human body upon this planet. Our Selves (aka our Souls, or our Higher Selves) are not bogged down in ego or fear or anger.

Negative thoughts belong to the mind, and Not to the Soul.
You Are An Immortal Soul.

Sometimes in meditation, I am able to temporally turn off the verbal noise of my mind. But otherwise my mind is a constant babble of nonsense, and sometimes that nonsense is vicious and negative and angering and frightening.

A lot of my mind nonsense seems to become nasty when I’m out walking the dog. This should be a pleasure, but sometimes a remembered anger towards someone who hurt me when I was 14 years old may decide to arise, and I walk along feeling furious. Or sometimes a frightening and violently negative future possibility, may be imagined in great detail, and I walk along feeling terrified.

But then, I become conscious.
Then I remember that I Am An Immortal Soul.
Then I remember that I Am In Charge Here.
And then I realize that I Can Observe My Mind From A Detached Distance

Silly nonsense is allowed, but destructive nonsense is not.

I control my mind first by detaching and observing it. And then by drawing a big Red X right over it. I hold that X there as I feel myself calming down. I allow a peaceful calm to enter my heart, and then I manage to laugh, or at least to smile. But I think visually.

That may work for you, but if you think audibly, then maybe music would be better for you. Try singing a happy tune. Or hearing enjoyable music. Or humming it. Emphasis here on the happy. Sing a happy song aloud, or within yourself. It can even be a joyful baby lullaby you may recall. Remember that You Are An Immortal Soul, and that You Are In Charge Here, and allow that happy tune to bring you comfort and clarity and joy.

If you like, you may then try laughter. Light does put out the darkness. Joyful laughter is Light.

Mandela would never have been successful if he hadn’t forgiven his oppressors and his jailers. Forgiving creates peace. Forgiving lifts a very heavy weight off your shoulders. Forgive your mind.

Treat your mind like an annoying roommate you live with. Don’t get angry with it, just treat it as the hallucination it is, and overwhelm it with joyful song, or with laughter, or with a big red X, Or In Any Other Way You Feel Comfortable With.

Become conscious and detach and observe. The more often you do this, the easier it will become.

And that is my thought. Though how correct a thought it may be for you, I don’t know. If you would like to run this by your therapist, then do.

While your mind is calm and clear, you may spend some time now recalling happy songs or calming music, so it may be more easily accessible if and when the need presents itself.

___________________
Also, it seems to me that you have become confused, or perhaps a bit obsessed, or perhaps a bit distressed, about much of the exhaustive detail within the structure of the Law of One.

Remember that we on this forum often manage to disagree among ourselves over many particulars, and much of the minutia, within the writing of LoL. None of us knows everything.

I died when I was 25 years old, back in 1974 (car “accident”).
I remember being in a round arena, with many other near death experiencers. We were all wearing dark robes with the hood pull up over our heads, so we could not see each others faces. The lessons learned were presented to us on a large globe floating in front of us and at the center of this circle. The globe was in constant movement, changing colors and changing content, and always fascinating. It was very complicated, and very easy to understand. The laws of the universe felt clear and simple.

And that’s the way I like it.
I prefer the big picture, without getting bogged down in the minuscule.

What I find important is that Light is stronger than darkness.
That there are no mistakes, because mistakes are our teachers.
That soul growth is destiny.
That we are known and loved.
And that a complete and easy and gentle, understanding of the universe is a given, in our future, at the the perfect time and moment, when we are ready for it.

[Unbound]

I could definitely use seeing the divine within myself. That is fantastical thinking. Anything fantastic I used to think would distract me from being able to live an ordinary life. But I want the fantastic in my life. I don't want a boring life. But I don't want to fall victim to the voices that I've heard in the past. There's enough in life to keep me busy. But I don't enjoy being busy. I'd rather be doing nothing at all. Maybe listen to music and watch furry videos are two things I enjoy doing.

I like your idea Tanner about seeing the divine within me. I am worthy.

Those things you enjoy I would say are part of your natural grounding mechanism. My girlfriend has tv series she watches and it is what keeps her grounded. Being grounded isn't about holding back the spiritual, but exchanging and embracing the human self that you are. When I say seek the divine in yourself I don't mean to seek the Creator consciousness or the aspects of your mind, but to see how your physical body and physical existence is real.

Consider the energy it takes to animate your physical body, the energy it takes to vitalize your cells and the patterns that have been carefully woven so you may have a working, human personality. See that you are the same divine being when you go to work, when you watch TV, when you meditate or do spiritual practices, when you are healing, when you eat and when you sleep, you are the same divine self.

You can learn to recognize your body as the temple of your spirit and your personality as the dweller or keeper of the temple whom watches it over.

It is up to you to decide who (what parts of personality and character) is present and keeper in your temple. Most importantly then is to realize is that every temple is created with a purpose. What is held sacred in the temple of your physical body?

[AnthroHeart]

I'm learning new things everyday. Finding the divine in the ordinary. Thank you Tanner and Charles.
I don't really meditate any longer. I do listen to music that I enjoy, and watch videos that give me encouragement. My words are few, but I thank you both for your sharing.

I have lately thought of the Ra material as so fantastic as to be unbelievable. Just because the ordinary is all that I see now. My spiritual experiences have come to an end. But even in ordinary life there are things that excite me.

[Unbound]

I think maybe you are at the point where distinguishing between ordinary and fantastic is no longer useful. The Ra Material is indeed fantastic for its philosophical context, but in actuality it is just as ordinary as anything else. It is a book or collection of writing that are discussions and experiences had by people just like yourself.

However, what is truly fantastic about the Ra Material and other material of its kind is not its magical ideas or fantastical thinking, but the fact that it is something which is accessible to everyone, no matter how magical or mundane one thinks they are. It is not the book or material that is magical or fantastic, it is the consciousness and individuals who resonate with it that are the true magic.

Ra: I am Ra. We do not intentionally do this. However, there will be confusion. The errors which have occurred have occurred due to the occasional variation in the vibrational complex of this instrument due to its ingestion of a chemical substance. It is not our intent in this particular project to create erroneous information but to express in the confining ambiance of your language system the feeling of the infinite mystery of the one creation in its infinite and intelligent unity.

We cannot offer shortcuts to enlightenment. Enlightenment is of the moment, is an opening to intelligent infinity. It can only be accomplished by the self, for the self. Another self cannot teach/learn enlightenment, but only teach/learn information, inspiration, or a sharing of love, of mystery, of the unknown that makes the other-self reach out and begin the seeking process that ends in a moment, but who can know when an entity will open the gate to the present?

Remember, Ra is another self equal to you and they have done nothing more or less with the Ra Material than attempted this sharing of information, inspiration, love and allusion to the immense mystery and unknown that is the Creator.

The one undifferentiated intelligent infinity, unpolarized, full and whole, is the macrocosm of the mystery-clad being. We are messengers of the Law of One. Unity, at this approximation of understanding, cannot be specified by any physics but only be activated or potentiated intelligent infinity due to the catalyst of free will. This may be difficult to accept. However, the understandings we have to share begin and end in mystery.

We are the microcosmic mystery-clad being. We, ourselves, in all of our complexity of self, are the most fantastical thing available to us. The patterns of our fantastic nature are woven in to our bodies, minds and spirits. See that the fantastic and the ordinary are one.

[Unbound]

Addedum:

The mystery and unknown quality of the occurrences we are allowed to offer have the hoped-for intention of making your peoples aware of infinite possibility. When your peoples grasp infinity, then and only then, can the gateway be opened to the Law of One.

[isis]

...

I died when I was 25 years old, back in 1974 (car “accident”).
I remember being in a round arena, with many other near death experiencers. We were all wearing dark robes with the hood pull up over our heads, so we could not see each others faces. The lessons learned were presented to us on a large globe floating in front of us and at the center of this circle. The globe was in constant movement, changing colors and changing content, and always fascinating. It was very complicated, and very easy to understand. The laws of the universe felt clear and simple.

And that’s the way I like it.
I prefer the big picture, without getting bogged down in the minuscule.

What I find important is that Light is stronger than darkness.
That there are no mistakes, because mistakes are our teachers.
That soul growth is destiny.
That we are known and loved.
And that a complete and easy and gentle, understanding of the universe is a given, in our future, at the the perfect time and moment, when we are ready for it.

very cool...thank u for sharing...gave me goosebumps.

[Crysis]

Sounds to me you made a religion out of LOO material. You're trapped in your own construct. You can resolve that in an instant, treat LOO as an information.
There are texts (centuries old) that are more 'grande' than LOO.
Teleporting in 6th dimension is not grandeur, it is normal as your walk in the park in 3rd dimension. Creating your own solar system is not grandeur, it is what Creation does.
What I do with LOO is: read, understand, practice (what you can), and compare.

I cannot trust that which is not clear to my mind, and clear is only that, which is experienced. Even you said something similar to this.

I am eternaly greatfull for all information. That is all I can say about LOO (at the moment).