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Member: Virtue
Location: Indiana

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Not alone
Published by Virtue on June 5, 2009 3:16pm.  Category: General

This will be my first entry~

I have discovered that I am not alone. My entire life has been mainly lived in solitude with only a select few (very few) close companions over time. Most people present me with hostility once they get to know me. They feel threatened. I began hiding who I was. I took it personally and felt rejected. I thought I was doing something wrong. But I have learned that is not the case. I was being myself. Honest, forthright, and insightful. They weren't used to having such an intimate encounter with someone who they felt could "see through them" and this made them defensive.

 

I have felt a tremendous breakthrough in the last few days. For me, the past 4 years have been full of trials and tribulations. I really connected with a man for the first time in my life, but after the initial meeting and first few weeks of bliss came all the hard work. Last year I lost a baby in the 38th week. He was my son. He died a week before he was expected to arrive. I understand why I was given this obstacle. It was the final straw in a long line of tumultuous events.

 

I am feeling a sense of rebirth now. Finding this forum was key for me because I realized I am not the only one who feels "different". I am ready to embrace those "different" qualities now and walk my path. I am grateful for all of you being here and I am so happy to know I am not the only one. I honestly thought I was going crazy because of my "purpose" or "mission". I couldn't understand why I felt so compelled to do something when I was surrounded by zombies.

 

I am ready to learn more about what I can do to be the change I want to see in this world.




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