Bring4th

I'm not even sure that is the appropriate word.
I have a career I don't hate, I have activities I do. I have people I talk to regularly but I kind of feel like everyone else around me is going about life with some sort of purpose, some dream or hope. Something that is their primary anchor here in life.

I used to have that but after my catalyst experience I find the meaning of past times or experiences seems hollow or empty.

Its been a few years and I still can not find any real endeavor or passion to throw myself into that compares really to that feeling of home I experienced.

I see beauty everywhere, love but no thing to really dive deeply into.
It feels like everyone just moves along on track of their material life and I cant make that enough for me.

I'm curious if this is a wanderer thing or maybe I need some sort of healing.
I've heard people who have NDE come back and nothing feels quite like it used to. The experience is less somehow after what they experienced.

Curious of your experiences.

It may be a wanderer thing at times. I have felt empty, wanting to die in the past, and terrified. Right now I'm in my passion and I could do it all day, and am seeing synchronicity a lot more than I used to.


I haven't had an NDE, but I didn't need one.

The Law of One when one reads it opens them up to more experience and potential catalyst, and greater responsibility for their life.

If you can't find Joy, reach for Contentment or something.

I searched for emotional charts on Google Images.

You will feel better by going for the next best emotion above yours. Just small steps.

Here is just one chart of many:

What was your catalyst experience??

(04-29-2017, 12:41 PM)Glow Wrote: [ -> ]Do you ever feel directionless?

Sure. I think we all do from time to time.

(04-29-2017, 02:27 PM)Coordinate_Apotheosis Wrote: [ -> ]What was your catalyst experience??

I had the experience of meeting myself in another. Visions and other sources have told me it is a primary soulgroup member.
Law of confusion of course I'm not exactly sure that is how it works.
Basically it was finding a direct source where I could tangibly be "home" while still here, which as you can imagine was a very welcome sensation.
Hell being separation from god/creator/oneness, I had that separation relieved for a while.
It culminated in an absolute experience of the creator/infinity/oneness in what I have posted about before where an open hearted hug between us became a vortex of sorts a ball of incredible magenta energy swirling from our heart chakras to well above our heads and the feeling of overwhelming bliss/joy/ecstasy.

We just stood together laughing at full possible volume and swept up in the experience of absolute love and well there are no words but overwhelming.
I had often wondered how heaven could not be boring if you spent an eternity there but in that experience I now know how eternity could be the exactly right length of time.

We are still in contact but our lives are not to be very intertwined. He fought his spiritual awakening because it was to much for him, and that is ok but after having felt home here...
It seems to have increased my craving for that unity. I feel so separate now, like the feeling of such oneness/home just highlighted the contrast.

I keep trying to do things that will anchor me here, something to throw myself into so I no longer seek to be reunited so acutely.
I guess it has made me crave the distraction others find so easily but I know I could not bury this truth in something material.

I keep hoping something will come along, some purpose for me to have experienced that and be left different, left like I no longer quite fit here, cant fake it.
Hopefully there is a way it will benefit someone, I haven't figured out what yet. What a waste if it was all to feel further separated, to seek unity more intently.
I still hoping there is a point, some plan, some good it will do.