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Hello Smile

I have been reading the Law of One and I am now almost done with book 3.... lol I feel that since I have became aware of my polarization towards service to others that it has kinda hindered my ability to really feel this connection.... (Not really... I feel like the word hinder is reall a hyperbillous statement) lol.... but it has made me aware of it.... Now when I give someone money or food if they need it... I think to myself..... lol am I giving this to them because it comes from the kindness of my heart or am I doing it because it will help me polarize towards positive but then I think... does that help you polarize positive if you are doing it to polarize to positive? lol Paradox?!

What do you guys thing? lol I am just going with the flow now and I know when I really do great things for another or for earth that I feel it inside and i believe that is what really matters.

Smile
Well, a few things.

First, the basic contradiction you're seeing is simply part of the polarity distortion. It's impossible to entirely resolve because the true resolution is understanding that because All is One, service to one IS service to All. However, that is not a very useful understanding when working on 3D service. And in more practical terms, any interaction with others - positive or negative - will influence them and also influence you. Being aware of this relationship does not change it. You're not taking away from your own polarization just by knowing that it's happening.

Also, again on a more practical note, Ra explicitly said that activities done to better oneself are still positive if service-to-others is the long-term goal. Ie, if someone is called to be a healer, this would entail several years of self-focused study to learn medicine and become licensed as a doctor. Those years of study still have a positive impulse behind them, even if actual STO action is delayed.

Finally, it's good to remember that the desire to be of service to others is generally more important than any practical results. The STO impulses/energies can express themselves through action in many many different ways. The underlying impulses are what matter, because outcomes are extremely difficult to predict - particularly from behind the veil.

So, basically, fuhgeddaboudit. Just keep on keepin' on. If your underlying desire is to help others, you'll keep finding ways - maybe even new ways- of being of service, no matter what you learn in the meantime.
You're simply self-aware, it shouldn't make any difference.
(11-15-2017, 01:11 AM)SkyGodWarrior Wrote: [ -> ]Hello Smile

I have been reading the Law of One and I am now almost done with book 3.... lol I feel that since I have became aware of my polarization towards service to others that it has kinda hindered my ability to really feel this connection.... (Not really... I feel like the word hinder is reall a hyperbillous statement) lol.... but it has made me aware of it.... Now when I give someone money or food if they need it... I think to myself..... lol am I giving this to them because it comes from the kindness of my heart or am I doing it because it will help me polarize towards positive but then I think... does that help you polarize positive if you are doing it to polarize to positive? lol Paradox?!

What do you guys thing? lol I am just going with the flow now and I know when I really do great things for another or for earth that I feel it inside and i believe that is what really matters.

Smile

Give it some time. You have just got aware that helping others aids your polarization, so sit with this knowledge for a while. Get to know this new awareness and see how it makes you feel in different situations. Service to others is a life long lesson, which is spanning over thousands and thousands of years for native third density entities. For wanderers, these lessons may perhaps come in one incarnation, but are in no way easy. So just sit with this new awareness and give it some time.

On a practical side I would use a metaphor of a manager who tells his employees to always smile to customers and be nice to them. As an employee you might then always smile to customers and be nice to them, but if it doesn't come from a genuine place within you, from the heart - because *you* want to do this, not because your manager told you to - then it doesn't matter how much you smile and are being nice, it still doesn't aid your positive polarization, right? And so is, in my opinion, your situation of caring and knowing. Polarization is a result of opening the heart, not intellectually understanding the function of it. 

I think that meditation in this case is the best tool. To sit with what you now know. Contemplate. Analyze. Pray. Or whatever you find working for you. And just give it time.
Don't get confused - as so many people do - with taking the service to others philosophy as a literal statement of what it entails (though it does often result in serving others). It's more about a configuration of your beliefs - that you believe and truly are trying to embrace unconditional love in all of its forms.

If you, like many of us, have a lot of distorted conditional beliefs regarding love of yourself, then you are actually practicing service to others philosophy by healing and transforming your conditional self-love into unconditional self-love. You will then naturally be drawn into focusing more on actually serving others and focusing on lessons of loving others conditionally. To put it simply, the reason for this is: if you can't begin to love yourself unconditionally, how can you begin to love others unconditionally? 

If you attempt to focus exclusively on heart/green beliefs (or throat/blue ray) while ignoring lower energy centers that are in shambles, you will quickly tire yourself out and become unstable. There's a reason Ra recommends balancing the energy centers from the bottom up (red-orange-yellow-green/heart etc). Actually serving others flows organically when you embrace unconditional love - if serving others is something you put on your to-do list and use to remind yourself as to what you "should do", you're doing it wrong. 
Knowing about spiritual principles doesn’t make your love any less genuine. Unless of course you are generous only because you know you’ll receive good karma for it. You still get the positive karma but it’s not as great as one who is generous because his heart is open and he wants to give for the well-being and happiness of others. It all depends on your attitude. But,

Knowing about spiritual principles in and of themselves doesn’t make it less genuine.

One takes on a spiritually mature attitude when he seeks what is beneficial to his walking of the positive path and what is not. Certain choices and actions are not helpful. Some are helpful. Should we remain in ignorance of what is helpful and what is not? I don’t think so. Polarization is done by conscious choice.

One learns that generosity produces positive results (or he’s already generous yet ignorant of karmic Law, upon learning about it his generosity is not any less pure. He is simply more aware of the consequences of his actions). He wants to encourage and promote that positivity in the world, so he gives knowing that generosity is good for the self and for others. And usually to the positive seeker, the thought is about serving others, not the benefit that you gain. At least that’s the way it is for me. I can share and be generous because that’s natural to me. It’s an afterthought that I think that giving produces positive karma.

Buddhism talks about generosity and giving in the “Dana Suta”. I recommend reading it! Scott Mandelker has two videos on YouTube reading and discussing the Dana Suta.
(11-15-2017, 01:11 AM)SkyGodWarrior Wrote: [ -> ]I have been reading the Law of One and I am now almost done with book 3.... lol I feel that since I have became aware of my polarization towards service to others that it has kinda hindered my ability to really feel this connection.... (Not really... I feel like the word hinder is reall a hyperbillous statement) lol.... but it has made me aware of it.... Now when I give someone money or food if they need it... I think to myself..... lol am I giving this to them because it comes from the kindness of my heart or am I doing it because it will help me polarize towards positive but then I think... does that help you polarize positive if you are doing it to polarize to positive? lol Paradox?!

Great timing, Mr. Warrior, sir.  I just read this passage the other day, fits perfectly with your query:

Hatonn Wrote:My brothers and sisters, we do not wish for you to be alarmed, fearing perhaps that we have chosen to embark upon lengthy philosophical discussions without reference to your present situation, for there is, as you might say, a method to our madness. The temptation exists to regard your efforts towards service as money placed within a bank, drawing sufficient interest to pay for a ticket out of this illusion when the harvest time arrives. My brothers and sisters, today is the day in which the rent comes due, as this instrument would say, for the attainment of your service could be regarded as compounded …

(Side one of tape ends.)

(L channeling)

I am Hatonn. I am with this instrument and we find your own instruments humorous.

The interest compounded upon your savings of service, so to speak, are not stored up, but rather returned to you instantly that you may use your gains to further your own efforts toward the development of your ability toward selfless service. Do not be disheartened that your efforts toward service seem tainted because of your awareness that your efforts result from a desire to improve yourself sufficiently to attain harvestability, for this process is within the order of the universe.

The interest gained is the establishment of a path which through habit will more and more smoothly and assuredly guide your efforts toward a selfless form of service. Have you noticed, my brothers and sisters, that although the initial acts of service to others may come with difficulty and only after lengthy forethought and argument with one’s more selfish nature, after a sufficient number of these experiences occur, you may suddenly realize that the path toward service to others, while still motivated by service to self, has become more easily acquired as your nature, your vibration, has been adjusted through your efforts toward an automatic choice or orientation toward service to others without tremendous amounts of lengthy forethought and planning.

For this reason, do not be disheartened by the selfishness which exists within all of us, for this characteristic being of negative or selfish polarization acts as a catalyst which results in selfless performance of service to others. We would encourage, therefore, all efforts toward service to others, however motivated, and would comfort those who find their own selfish nature disquieting.


Hatonn, Sept 20, 1981. All emphasis mine.

What you are describing in your question is not a problem so much an example of how all service has a catalytic component..  The contemplation you are doing is helping you understand yourself better, your motivations, your desire.  These cannot help but polarize you, either in the direction of seeing how your progress dovetails with others', or by showing you how you can fake positivity and thereby manipulate others.  But what it won't do is leave you in the morass of indifference, which is the key to making use of the catalyst.

The problem is always the lack of overview, the way we can look at our past and see one event as part of progression, but look at our present and see only an event without progression.  This is where faith comes in, so we can treat our present as part of continuum and have more patience and grace for ourselves, and make use of what is difficult instead of judging and characterizing ourselves by it based on the immediacy of something as fleeting as a single moment.
So it's a good beginning to start doing something "kind" and stop doing unkind things because of desire for reward (or fear of consequences/punishment for not doing it which is basically the same thing). "The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom." (Bible) As long as we cling to the goal of selfless performance of service to others. "There is no fear in love: but perfect love casteth out fear, because fear hath punishment; and he that feareth is not made perfect in love." (Bible)

In Greek philosophy and Christian mystic tradition this is called purgative way or katharsis - the first stage of mystical journey to perfection. The classic tripartite schema of ways is: purgation, illumination and union/glorification (or katharsis, photismos, teleiosis or henosis).
Smile

Thank you all for your insight into the topic. At the end of the day a good deed is still a good deed.... I didnt have much money but when this homeless man asked me for help haha I gave him a $20 He originally thought I wasn't going to give him anything.. lol I sure showed him haha But yes I agree with yall in the idea that the conscious realization of doing kind things still continues to be that of the positive polarization behind it. N after meditation and being out in the world and helping my "step" family rebuild there house after a hurricane I realize that its not just you that has a say in this polarization.

I did not like one sec of building the house.. cutting out insulation or painting dry wall lol or being there for 8hrs and during my thanksgiving break.. not for a moment but I enjoy being with them. I know that everyone is connected as one and there is a strand of light connecting each of us together and when things like that are done I feel like there love for you increases your light. So even if I do not like what I am doing I am happy and humble to be of service haha

Thank you all for the help! On to the next meditation thought...

Smile
A guy was walking on the curb with a sign that said "tacos" or something like that. I happened to have 2 tacos with me and gave them to him. Probably doesn't happen that much for him.
Yeah its funny how that stuff happens lol... but its like.. if every person is God then why not put yourself in a position to see if your other self will give you tacos lol...

Smile
It's exactly that. God creating situations where God can serve God. It's a big circle. Just keep doing it, the lessons emerge, and wisdom is learned.
Smile haha if there is one thing I know its that the universe has great humor lol.... some of the things that the universe find soooo funny is sooo serious to us lol. Lol... who sets out on an adventure knowing the path is leading back to where you started? That statement is lol the answer to life.... but meaning of life is to enjoy and live that path.

Smile