Bring4th

I feel as i'm stuck in a loop of experience where I repeat this incarnation over and over again. A cycle in which I continually figure out my illusion from intelligent energy; while not being able to apply it with respect to service to others as I have blockages which I can't overcome the resistance. As my consciousness begins to fully understand consciousness my thoughts start to charge my third eye giving me the ability to see space/time. In my third eye, I create and open the gate through thought and as I communicate through thought at the gates of intelligent infinity, I understand my lesson wasn't learned, I come back to relive this incarnation living in a never ending cycle. I come back and relive the same exact path as freewill is but an illusion. I know this isn't the first or second time, and probably not the last time I relive this exact time/space.

And boy do I feel hopeless.

Quote:I feel as i'm stuck in a loop of experience where I repeat this incarnation over and over again. A cycle in which I continually figure out my illusion from intelligent energy; while not being able to apply it with respect to service to others as I have blockages which I can't overcome the resistance.

I'm in a similar boat, only the feeling of forced repeated incarnations isn't due to having a resistance to any particular polarity but due to an inability to cope with a life filled with a particular form of difficulty/suffering. A lot of the major points or themes of my life seem quite familiar, as if I've been walking through this pattern more than once and am in a sense subconsciously used to it. I get the feeling I just commit suicide eventually each time, maybe getting further along in one life, or dying sooner than expected in another, without enough progress ever being made to fully learn whatever lesson I'm here to get and thus break out of the cycle. A maddening possibility is the idea that I'm actually in control of the cycle myself and, while discarnate, am freely choosing to return of my own will, every time. Nothing about my life really surprises me, especially that which sort of should. Discovering about the Law of One, the Orion Group, having 'tinfoil hat' positions, and other esoteric things simply felt like what would be a normal part in anyone's life.

As for being forced into an endless reincarnation cycle due to free will being an illusion, I don't think that's a significant possibility. I myself haven't encountered anything in my life to consider free will as anything other than fact. In my experience, Choices and Intentions are genuinely real things, in a similar manner to Love and Fear also being 'real' in ways the Ra Material goes over. You can literally fill rooms with Emotion, I've done this and experienced other do it, and you can also charge water with Intentions, which are merely decisions. The scientific hypothesis that free will is an illusion rests on the idea that Consciousness cannot affect anything. It's to say that the 'ghost in the shell' of the body has the property of having no influence on anything. Since no scientist has been able to provide any scientific evidence that consciousness itself even exists in the first place, saying definitively that it works or does not work in any particular way at this point seems illogical. It's my position that the fear you describe of experiencing an infinite incarnation loop due to a lack of free will isn't justified. I just don't think it's an idea you should entertain.

I hope you find some hope in the future.

(03-10-2018, 11:12 PM)Cannon Wrote: [ -> ]As for being forced into an endless reincarnation cycle due to free will being an illusion, I don't think that's a significant possibility. I myself haven't encountered anything in my life to consider free will as anything other than fact. In my experience, Choices and Intentions are genuinely real things, in a similar manner to Love and Fear also being 'real' in ways the Ra Material goes over. You can literally fill rooms with Emotion, I've done this and experienced other do it, and you can also charge water with Intentions, which are merely decisions. The scientific hypothesis that free will is an illusion rests on the idea that Consciousness cannot affect anything. It's to say that the 'ghost in the shell' of the body has the property of having no influence on anything. Since no scientist has been able to provide any scientific evidence that consciousness itself even exists in the first place, saying definitively that it works or does not work in any particular way at this point seems illogical. It's my position that the fear you describe of experiencing an infinite incarnation loop due to a lack of free will isn't justified. I just don't think it's an idea you should entertain.

I hope you find some hope in the future.

First off thank you for the reply

I wish it would be simple to not entertain the idea of the law of free will. As I balance all the experiences in my life and dive into the depths of my mind, I find that nothing matters and we don't have true free will. I remember when I was a young lad I was hitting my arm and thought why are you hitting yourself. Ever since that moment I can see that my thoughts control me, but know that I dont control my thoughts. After that I would always forget about it because it would drive me insane to think about. Ra doesn't directly break the law of freewill so he doesnt break the law of confusion, but he says that our path is determined by 6th density.

I find that my only hope is to experience and keep on experiencing, even though I'm closed off from the world. If I keep on balancing the parts of me that don't need experience, I become closer to dying. As the thought of no freewill smothers my mind, it starts to draw energy from the rest of my body where I need it (Crohn's in the colon). I can feel the stress as the thoughts intrigue me and one after another flying out of some hidden place in my mind they take over as if a negative thought form is charging my third eye. I have to start making random sounds to save myself from accessing the gates of intelligent infinity.

I am always able to somehow find hope whether it is blind or not since I feel as though I have to have hope to escape this life. But in the back of my head the thoughts that this is where you went wrong or do this instead of that to change the outcome still reside. Maybe I will walk around with the thought of nothing matters and i have no hope, and try to experience hope first hand. This seemingly if my best option since I don't have the ability to feel for others and I can't meditate on the thought because I'll be restarting this incarnation.

I might add that I feel as though I'm trying to solve a riddle with thought, but the only way to solve it is with mindless action.

Quote:"Ra doesn't directly break the law of freewill so he doesnt break the law of confusion, but he says that our path is determined by 6th density."

I never got the idea of our path being determined by anyone but ourselves, from reading the Ra Material. According to my understanding, our higher self will dictate lessons that are needed to be learned for our spiritual development, but it is up to us to learn them, or to refuse and therefore stagnate spiritually. We're also given the choice of negative polarity, which cuts us off from the higher self entirely (sixth density) and involves us learning all of our lessons 'on our own' (if such a concept is anything but an illusion concerning the Law of One.) I also remember reading that a third density soul is given the freedom to choose whatever sort of incarnation they wish, of any ease or difficulty, the only barrier being to that freedom being that they must have an awareness high enough to consciously understand the decision. This can lead to them making obviously unwise decisions that are nevertheless respected by those who would suggest to the entity to choose differently. I don't believe the Ra Material endorses free will being an illusion in the slightest. Not only does it say it exists, and that it exists everywhere, it holds it up to be one of the most fundamental and important aspects of reality itself bar none. The "Primary Distortion."

However, whatever the truth truly is concerning Free Will, your feelings of hopelessness resonate with me deeply. I wish I could provide some meaningful service.

I have often resonated with this feeling. I seem to have another issue with free will though. If we live respectfully of every others free will, what right do we have to change or even influence the world? What right do we have to any action that could alter anothers free will? It would be unbalanced and unfair. So it would seem my hopelessness is that I have talked myself out of taking any action at all. The alternative would be that only my free will matters, and thus become STS. Of course its all rather more complicated than that.

Otherwise I would like to say that our relationship with time is paramount also to our emotions and feelings. It is a quantum world, and there is only now, this moment. The choice is constantly in the moment so it is up to us to define everything. It might not be so useful to see that grand picture, the endless repetition of it all but rather to hold in focus what you want to know and feel, in the now. I feel I have come to terms with the cycle. Each moment colours a new experience and so I shall be thankful.

I would offer a hug. I wish I could help.
It makes me sad to see others feeling down like that.
But it does get better.
Even I need help sometimes.
I think it's great that you're reaching out.

Think about everything you have ever done. Then do something that isn't any of those things.

(03-12-2018, 03:05 PM)Rhayader Wrote: [ -> ]I have often resonated with this feeling. I seem to have another issue with free will though. If we live respectfully of every others free will, what right do we have to change or even influence the world? What right do we have to any action that could alter anothers free will? It would be unbalanced and unfair. So it would seem my hopelessness is that I have talked myself out of taking any action at all. The alternative would be that only my free will matters, and thus become STS. Of course its all rather more complicated than that.

There seems to be a misunderstanding here.  There is nothing in Ra, Quo, or any other spiritual teaching that I know of which suggests in any way that acting is a violation of others' free will.

Free will does not mean that you get to do what you like, or that nothing (and no one) impinges on you in any way.  The entire purpose of catalyst is to impinge on you and get you to act, and we are constantly being exposed to a stream of catalyst from ourselves (our own minds, emotions and bodies - hunger, thirst, fatigue, sex drive, etc.), external reality, and other people.  That is by design, and that is also why I think those who escape reality to meditate on proverbial mountaintops are missing an essential point of incarnation.  Experience is supposed to poke at you and get you to move.

That is where free will comes in.  It is simply the principle that, in choosing how to respond to catalyst - how to act, really - we are to be ignorant of The Great Truth or "The One Right Way" to be (ie, those based on Love and Oneness of All).  We know of it - that has been made sure of by all the Great Teachers - but until we've chosen to experience what it's like to live the Law of One, it can very well sound like a bunch of hooey which we're totally free to ignore. 

This allows us to fall into all kinds of problematic patterns and consequences.  Another term for Free Will is the Law of Confusion.  So, if you and the others are confused while acting, great!  Neither of you is violating free will

And we're all confused as hell here.  Unlike Q'uo, for example -- and this is why for them, violating free will is a concern, while for us it isn't, and they have stated as much when asked during channeling sessions - to paraphrase, "don't worry about violating free will, the Veil takes care of that for you, not a concern."

So I'd say from your statement that Free Will is doing just fine, having allowed you to fall into the trap of confusion about its own nature.  All is as it should be.

Again, free will is not about having every possible action open to you, or about not being exposed to catalyst -- rather, it's about being free to respond to catalyst in any of the ways that are available to you at a given time, without knowing for sure what response is "right" or "wrong" with regard to the greater Reality which has been veiled from us, for the precise purpose of allowing us to respond freely.

So apart from free will, there is the question of how to polarize STO or STS, and that is indeed a separate matter.  In this regard the teaching is clear - any action intended with love (ie, goodwill) towards all parties is a good one, violating nothing; even better if it is somewhat balanced by wisdom, to the small extent that this is possible in 3D.

Final question: do you by any chance have some OCD tendencies, such as scrupulosity?  This is not meant to be judgmental or offensive; just a hunch - if so, then it may help to realize the distortion that these conditions bring to our thinking, and to attempt to sidestep these unhelpful thought patterns, trusting instead that, as we have repeatedly been told, "all is well".