(02-22-2011, 09:56 PM)ahktu Wrote: [ -> ]"Usually the people you see in your dreams represent aspects of yourself. So what qualities would you say represent that person most? Were they kind, caring, angry or stubborn? Whichever traits spring to mind, the dream is a reflection of those traits in yourself. This person represents that part of you, so it is important to pay attention to how they are acting and what is happening to them."
thanks Ahktu! The qualities would be independent, free, aggresive, strong and self assured.
If you are *wishing* to see this person again, this could also be an example of subconscious wish-fulfillment. Your mind is simply drawing to yourself what you want. It is a type of inner cleansing and closure.
"I only wish I could see them after one of these dreams."
"There is also the possibility of astral travel...I've met people in the astral planes before, but I would say the former idea is more likely. If you find out this person has had similar dreams, I'd say the chances would jump quite a bit."
they live very far away from me so I doubt I will ever find out is this one is the case, thanks for your reponse!
I guess I'd better offer my disclaimer, too: this is all just my opinion and how I would interpret the dream if I had it myself. If none of it sounds right, please don't let me hold you back from forming other opinions.
The main thing I remember about my dream last night was that I grew a beard. I looked into a mirror and saw it and I was like "AHHHH! GET IT OFF!" There was also something about giant trolls and a movie theater. And I didn't even eat anything weird before going to bed. Lol.
Last night I had a dream where I was in a temple (think Star-Gate SG-1 set) and at the rear there was a corridor which broke into a T-junction that has hidden from view. Going left I saw a room where there were a bunch of very tall aliens wearing white robes. They had big bulbous bald heads and were sort of gliding - moving around without moving their feet. They looked at me and I felt afraid, like they were going to zap me, and ducked back into the corridor. Then I went to the right and saw another room where there were some other aliens, basically man-like, wearing cool gray-black tights. They looked rather mean and nasty - sort of like Sting in the movie "Dune". But they didn't seem to notice me even when they looked right at me. In fact I started jumping up and down making monkey noises and they still didn't notice. When I went back to the entrance I had an ipad or something which apparently was recording what I saw. There were some officials that took it and downloaded what I had. They were quite happy with what I had gotten. Then I woke up, thinking that this would make for a cool science fiction movie. No clue what it all means, as usual.
Awesome dream, Etude. Could this perhaps be a metaphor for you observing various parts of your self, and presenting that information to your Higher Self so it can be evaluated and put to use? That, or maybe hanging around aliens is just awesome.
Had a long and complicated dream last night...I'm sure a lot of it has been lost. The main part I remember was that there was some kind of huge natural disaster or something, because the city was in a shambles, rubble all over the place. I was with about five other people, including my husband, and we were just making our way through the wreckage, trying to get from point A to point B. Apparently a lot of people were after us for some reason and we had to keep hiding from them or fighting them.
At one point we look over and there's just a huge lion standing there. It looks hungry and everyone is freaking out. The lion runs over like it's going to pounce on us, but I stepped in front of it and just looked it in the eye, staring deep into its soul, and the lion calmed down and stepped away.
We finally got to where we were going, but then some soldiers killed one of the guys in our group and it upset me a lot. It sort of turned into a video game because next thing I know we're starting all over, and I was trying to think of how to do it differently so the one guy wouldn't die. When we got to the point where the lion was again, there were tigers there this time, and I told my husband he should take care of it this time because tigers are his spirit animal. This crazy, rabid-looking house cat ran up to my leg and tried to bite me, and once again I just stared into its eyes and it backed down.
I remember some random part about a girl saying that faith and positivity were what would bring me money, not the other way around. She had a chart made of it and everything.
After I woke up and went back to bed it got kind of weird. There was this whole thing about super hero trading cards but it sort of became real and super heroes were running around. I suddenly turned into Deadpool and grabbed onto a flying backpack and started zooming up into the air. I was like "Whoa! How do you work this thing?!?" But I finally made it back to the ground. I was also looking for Beanie Babies, for some reason, even though they've been out of style for years now.
ahktu, sometimes the Lion is used to represent the Guardian at the Threshold, which protects/separates your higher self from you (see Egyptian mythology, and Rudolf Steiner's writings). I seem to recall Ra saying something about this as well, as a guardian of the gateway to intelligent infinity.
(02-23-2011, 06:27 PM)ahktu Wrote: [ -> ]The main thing I remember about my dream last night was that I grew a beard.
Hey Ahktu, the growing a beard I would spontaneously say could mean you are developing more of the so-called male characteristics - like becoming more assertive and dominant.
Or becoming more left-brained (the male side of the brain, logic, etc.) Not necessarily negative, imo.
I had a dream last night that I had one of my "fits" while I was watching TV, and somehow the TV recorded it all, then it started playing it back. It was scary to see what I look like when I go into that state. My face and voice changed dramatically, but the picture kept blurring out, like all the electromagnetic fields were screwy. Blah...
I had a dream that I went to some place wearing shorts and a loose shirt and i was watching david wilcock give a speech. through a little box inside this auditorium... but on the right side of the box was another opening or portal to an even larger one.
I waited for the speech to end and he told me he had to go and that I apologized but that I had important things to say to him. I told him about the story of the Kia.. and my new breakthroughs in chi manipulation. that i've researched his work and taken it a step farther for the adept.
Ugh...tons of nightmares last night. In the first one, I was a young dude, with this other guy, and we were sitting in someone's backyard or something. Some criminal comes up behind me with one of those wire things you strangle people with and throws it around my neck. I sort of popped out of my body and was able to see myself as this guy, the wire cutting into his neck and blood starting to come out. It was freaky. Then I was back in his body and I realized the cut wasn't that deep and I would be okay. The criminal made us come with him and he said he was going to rape us and stuff. He made us get in this weird flying car...it really seemed too tiny for three people. Somehow we ended up ditching him, and I wanted to get out of there because I felt like something even worse was coming. I looked down my street at my parent's house and saw all these tornado-looking clouds building up right over the house. Then suddenly this...avalanche of shadows came pouring down onto the house, swallowing it. I was like CRAAAAAP! WE GOTTA GO! So we start flying, but the car is really freaking slow, and I don't know where to go where we will be safe. I thought about flying to Carla's house, but it was so far and the car was barely moving and when I tried to run it was like my legs wouldn't work.
Then I sort of went into the next dream. I was in this school, and there was this set of twins there who were terrorizing everyone. They were very powerful, and I knew right off the bat they weren't really human. Apparently they were hypnotizing everyone somehow. After a while I seemed to be the only one left who had any idea what was going on. They brought me this pizza and were like "You must be hungry, why don't you eat it?" But I could clearly see that one of them had rubbed this nasty white stuff all over it. I knew it was some kind of drug, and if I ate it I'd be brainwashed like everyone else, so I kept saying no. They started slowly changing form until they went from looking like young men into adult women...I think they changed bodies several times in the dream. One of them told me I had no choice- it would be easier to eat the drug and get it over with. Once I was drugged I would be happy...I wouldn't know all the pain that was happening.
When I still refused one of them pulled out some nasty looking syringes. He/she said something along the lines of "Fine. If you want to do it the hard way, we'll just force it into you." They had me all backed into a corner and I was really freaking out. I didn't want to become a mindless slave. Somehow I managed to distract the one with the needles and grab them from him/her, then I jammed both of them into his/her chest and injected the drug. I knew it wouldn't have the same effect on these kind of people, but it was all I could think of to do. I then started running like a goat on fire, but my legs still weren't working right. I was running all slow, and these creatures were abnormally fast and looked like men again. They caught up to me pretty quick, and the one was all pissed because I'd put the drug in him. I can't really remember what happened, but I don't think they ever managed to make me take the drug.
After I woke up and went back to bed I dreamed they built a lot of new stores by Carla's house. There was this one place that was supposed to be a school for studying UFOs, and I thought that Don had built it, and I kept wanting to go check it out but stuff kept happening. I ended up going to all these different stores...it was like a compulsion I had to go to these places, though I didn't seem to be buying anything. I was suddenly in a mall-type place and realized my shoes needed shining (WTF I was wearing sneakers), so I got a thing of shoe polish and a cloth and all that and went out into the hall to shine my shoes. One of my friends was sitting out there, and he was apparently a professional shoe shiner, and he was like "Oh no, don't do it yourself! Let me shine your shoes!" I really didn't want to wait for him to get done with his other customers, but he looked so upset about it that I just waited to let him do it, if it would really make him feel better.
I was back at my mom's, and she had made this huge batch of cookies and drinks and stuff that she was apparently sending to important business men in the mail. For some reason, it was of absolute importance that they got these cookies, and she asked me to keep an eye on them for a while. The package was very fragile, and I was in a park with kids running around and stuff, and I was afraid someone was going to knock into it and mess it up, or steal it or something, but it was so bulky that I didn't want to just stand there and hold it. At the same time I was still trying to get to all these stores that were occult shops, though one apparently sold bread. I wanted to find the owner of the store to tell him that I was a super hero (WTF???) , and I liked his bread so much I would give a testimonial about it. In the end I wound up going into this CREEPY parking garage that was on a huge incline- so steep you could barely walk up it, and I was trying to do so with all these packages and stuff as well. I finally got up the incline and saw this empty claw machine- the kind you try to get stuffed animals out of. The claw was twitching, even though the machine was turned off. There were a couple of girls looking at it talking about how weird it was. They started using the controls and the claw went up and down, even though there was nothing in the machine for it to grab. I started looking around and went to take some pictures because I thought the place was so creepy it would make a good drawing reference for my comic book, but I woke up before I could take any.
PHEW!
Those first two sound like a metaphorized account of astral contact with STS grays.
Eddie, I thought something like that, too. If it's metaphorized, I wonder what my higher self was trying to tell me?
Last night I had a grand epic Apocalyptic dream. Unfortunately, when I awoke (cat woke me up in the middle of the night), all of the scenes and vignettes of the dream were jumbled up, and I couldn't put them in order. I remember 3 main aspects:
1. At the time of Apocalypse, enormous megalithic carvings are discovered underground in Egypt (the hieroglyphs are the size of men), and there is a mad scramble, worldwide, to decipher the writings, as they appear to hold important clues to the fate of the Earth;
2. The sky is red, on fire; and there is great heat. Everything unprotected is burning or scorched.
3. I am observing it all from a safe place, where trusted friends are bringing me good things to eat.
Interesting dream for me last night. I've been working with Pleiadians to learn in my dreams.
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3/1/11 – 3/2/11
In the dream I learned that the world was what we made of it. It responded to my thoughts a lot more readily than the physical. It was much more fluid and seemingly graceful with how things flowed, such as things floating. At the end, I was with Jodie Foster (who played in the movie Contact). In this, I felt that she didn't believe in unseen things because she was a scientist. When I learned things were influenced by thought, I realized not to have fear of things. Even at the end, when I saw a bunch of junk floating/flying toward me. I was in front of a wall, and a bunch of junk was flying toward Jodie and me.
The junk was going rather fast but I learned not to be scared and that reality would smoothly shift. Well, then there appeared an old car flying toward us. I had a little bit of fear, but I didn't consciously give into the fear. I looked and Jodie wasn't scared either. I believe I said “oh no” sarcastically. Because we knew that things would change and nothing could hurt us. I was actually a little surprised that she knew the secret of thoughts affecting things. Changes would happen within a few seconds. When the car got toward us I slowly woke up. I did have slight anxiety while I was seeing it as it was a surprise, but knew the secret of creation.
The whole thing started when I was trying to understand social differences between races, such as Mexicans. I went into a world that was the Mexican world. There, I had to learn not to fear what was created. There were still many asleep who didn't realize they were creating their reality by their expectations of what would happen. This was much more accelerated than the physical. But it was just as believable. I was surprised the world was still holding together so well with this ability. But the world was also formed from those who were still asleep.
They weren't as much conscious creators. In that world once I learned, then we'd do things like fake a heart attack, or anything else, and observe and learn the people's responses. Many things floated in this world, and it was taken as part of the world. No one seemed stirred by the fact things were floating. In all it was a very rewarding dream. I learned a lot about how creation is affected by thought, by being able to see it much more accelerated, and in a world where everything appeared more fluid, and moved gracefully. I believe I am being taught in dreams more. The one last night taught me about how fluid reality is to our expectations. Except it was more pronounced than the physical.
Wow, GW. That sounds epic.
I need to stop playing video games...all my dreams have turned into video games, with dialogue options and everything. I really need to break my Final Fantasy addiction...XP
Last night I dreamed there were 2 brothers and a sister. For the most part, I was the sister, but I was also allowed a third person POV...I could see the scene from various viewpoints, as the audience in a movie would be able to. We were all on the run from something, trekking across this murky landscape. For some reason the younger brother became extremely jealous of the older one and ended up doing something that physically hurt him very badly, which made it harder for us to keep going. I knew it was the younger brother because I had the 3rd person view, and I think the older brother had guessed as much as well, but I didn't want to say anything because it might affect the storyline or something like that. The two of them ended up getting in a big fight and I ran outside because I couldn't stand all the negative energy in the room.
I was walking around my parent's backyard with my mom when a huge storm blew up. The neighbor's pool suddenly collapsed and sent a tidal wave of water across the lawn as well. It was doing a ton of property damage, but I started laughing uncontrollably because it was all so absurd.
I then dreamed Carla was having another channeling intensive. This one was in a huge, pretty house near the beach. The intensive itself was awesome, but then one of the girls there and I decided to go for a walk on the beach where all these little shops were. It started getting dark and this one guy from one of the shops started following us pretty obviously. At first I just ignored him, hoping he would get the message and go away, but he kept getting closer and closer. Finally I turned around like "Dude, stop it. That's creepy." He gave some lame excuse and kept following us.
Pretty soon several other guys came out of the shadows. They looked like his group and they all started following us as well. There was no doubt now that their intentions were menacing. I started trying to make as much noise as possible, realizing that we were still pretty close to civilization and someone was likely to hear us and come investigate. I started yelling everything I said while backing up slowly. We ended up running, and I remember I kept thinking that if any of them attacked me, I should jab them in the throat. Weird. Lol.
Had a weird one last night...I dreamed I was at a restaurant with my mom, and we were walking out to the car and this cat ran in front of us. I was like "awww...kitty." Then more and more cats kept appearing and I was like "uh...lots of kitties". About twenty cats ended up lining up on the sidewalk by the car and just staring at us...it was sort of creepy. Anyone know what large quantities of cats might mean?
(03-07-2011, 12:07 AM)ahktu Wrote: [ -> ]Had a weird one last night...I dreamed I was at a restaurant with my mom, and we were walking out to the car and this cat ran in front of us. I was like "awww...kitty." Then more and more cats kept appearing and I was like "uh...lots of kitties". About twenty cats ended up lining up on the sidewalk by the car and just staring at us...it was sort of creepy. Anyone know what large quantities of cats might mean?
All of the places I've read about cats in dreams say that they seem to represent the feminine aspect of yourself - that which is independant, cunning, and clever.
But I have no idea what a huge group of cats could mean... lol!
Well, first it was cats, now it's dogs. I dreamed there was this dog that somebody killed, but the spirit of the dog was vengeful and put a curse on a bunch of people. The dog spirit could talk, and he was angry at everyone and wanted to hurt them all. There was also something about a wristband that had a large turquoise stone in it.
I also dreamed I was part of a family or a group of people, and everyone thought that one boy in the group was possessed, so they called a priest. When the priest came in, it seemed that something inside of me had a violent reaction to him. I lost control of my body and started having one of my usual fits. I was really spazzing out, but everyone seemed to be mad at me because of it. It annoys me that I suffer these "fits" both while awake and in my dreams. It is almost always worse in my dreams...I seem to have a much harder time controlling it there.
I had a night of very vivid, very bizarre dreams. The one I remember most involved a friend of mine (we'll call him F) and I going to a restaurant. There was this girl who worked at the restaurant who kept slamming her face into plates, getting it all bloody, and laughing the whole time. I was like "Ooookkkkaaaayyyy...maybe that isn't the best thing to do to yourself."
I'm not sure how, but it seems that everyone in the restaurant was committed to a mental hospital- one of the new, highly-programmed kinds. I ended up having a moment of complete insanity in which I chased a girl around a room, howling like an animal with some sort of screwdriver thing in my hand. My mind really felt as if it had taken on animal qualities- as if I was operating entirely on instinct. Someone kept knocking on the door while this was happening, and for some reason that terrified me. It was instinctual fear- the fear of a predator. Finally, though, I seemed to regain my senses and realized that the best way to face a fear is to meet it head on, so I stopped chasing the girl and flung open the door.
It was a bunch of men in white coats. Apparently the mental hospital had decided that our group was too wild and they were having us transferred to some place far out in the country where they could forget about us. I ran from them for a bit, and ran into F, and we realized we couldn't get away from them- there were too many. I slid the screwdriver thing up into my sleeve and F stared at me with this look of concern, like he wasn't sure I was sane enough to be holding onto that, but as the men in white coats swooped down on us he didn't rat me out.
It was obvious when we got to the place out in the country that it was a dumping ground for crazies, and they had no intention of trying to rehabilitate us and let us go. They just wanted to put us away. I actually kind of liked it there- the scenery was beautiful, and for the most part we were all left to our own devices. As long as we stayed on the grounds and didn't go too crazy, the guards just watched us. It sort of felt like a break from the stress of reality. Still, some of us started talking about ways we might escape.
There was this one very obese guy dressed up like a clown who never talked. He suddenly spit out a piece of paper, and one of the guards picked it up and started reading it. It was a list of stuff he wanted, like shampoo and tissues and stuff. For some reason this struck me as extremely humorous and I actually woke up laughing.
A few other parts I remember with less detail:
1. Some friends and I were being harassed by this very powerful figure who could easily hypnotize people and bend them to his will (if you've ever read Bleach, it was a total Captain Aizen knockoff). I was trying to warn my friends not to get too close to him because he would hypnotize them.
2. I was in an enormous mansion owned by this woman, and I was wondering if she cleaned it all by herself, or had hired people to do it for her, as the whole place was spotless.
3. I was at work and they suddenly offered me a full time position...in fact they seemed desperate that I take it. I was happy because I would have secure hours and be making more money, but I was also sad because it involved working in a department I really don't like. They kept dumping more and more work and I me and I was like "C'mon guys, let me get one thing done before you ask me to do another!"
4. I was talking to my ex, who started being extremely rude, which is very unlike him. Even after we broke up we maintained a completely friendly relationship. I stormed over to my car, and then a guy who had often been rude to me in high school came over and apologized for my ex, which also stunned me, as I had never seen him as the nice type. I suppose this is telling me things aren't always what they seem?
About your fits carrying over into your dreams: That is interesting... I've had dreams where I'll think certain phrases that are somewhat uncharacteristic of me in the dream that I found myself thinking earlier in the day in waking time. But I've never had a bodily thing, like my tics that I sometimes experience, carry over into dreamtime.
You have such vivid and cinematic dreams! I'm almost jealous.
Aaron, I enjoy my vivid dreams...except when they're vivid nightmares. The other night I dreamed about this guy being tortured...it was highly graphic and I couldn't do anything or look away. It was terrible.
It annoys me that my "seizures" carry over into my dreams. Isn't it enough that I have them in real life? :p
(03-09-2011, 10:25 PM)ahktu Wrote: [ -> ]Aaron, I enjoy my vivid dreams...except when they're vivid nightmares. The other night I dreamed about this guy being tortured...it was highly graphic and I couldn't do anything or look away. It was terrible.
It annoys me that my "seizures" carry over into my dreams. Isn't it enough that I have them in real life? :p
Yeah, I suppose it's a double edged sword!
Well, what I was getting at is that my tics are occasional and not ever severe. They're bodily only, and they vary with the amount of sleep I've had, my diet, my stress level, and even my sobriety level! But they're not a part of my incarnational lesson plan, I think. (at least not a major part)
So, your fits/seizures being a bit more severe, they may be more central to your incarnational lesson plan. So, the occurrence of them in your dreams may be an important part of the message your higher self is giving to you. Are they recurring in your dreams?
i heard pan flutes in my dream but i blame Blatz for that.
they were loud.
i was outside most of the dream, which is rare.
i was in a broken down bus, everyone else was too scared to leave through the doorway cuz the teachers said it was dangerous. it was like a school trip. i got out and went through the doorway, i knew they were just lying to me cuz it was so easy to get out. i think they had done something to the bus to keep us trapped. so i left and the dream changed.
now, i know vehicles represent like how well our journey is going, and mine was broken down, but does it count that i got out? i'm not sure what to make of it here.
i also ate non-organic stuff on the bus, like candy. and i've completely stopped doing that. i was like oops. i think they were jelly beans.
if anyone has any thoughts on this i'd appreciate it.
oh yeah and the bus was high in the sky, in somekinda tube thing, that's why it was dangerous to get out. hmm.
the tube thing was also light blue, i think, and translucent plastic. while the bus maybe was yellow. there was light coming from the doorway that i had to go through, i think. meh it's all fuzzy.
Hmm, some crazy dream language going on there, Ocean!! I think it's beyond me... Although I've heard that cars can also represent your physical body.
Ocean, I've also taken cars to represent the state of your physical body. If it was broken down, are you having any health issues, or having a hard time integrating your mental, physical and spiritual bodies?
I think the fact that you left the bus would be a good sign..like you're breaking out of preconceived notions, and also perhaps realizing the transcendental nature of your body. Being in the sky usually represents freedom to me, so it's like you were stepping out into freedom? Blue almost always represents communication to me, but light blue reminds me of angelic presences.
Food usually means wisdom in my dreams. If you were eating food you consider to be unhealthy, perhaps you have taken in some information lately that is not particularly of use to your path of resonation? That would just be my interpretation.
Aaron, my "seizures" are recurring in both waking and sleeping. Usually I feel as if I am being invaded...I lose control of my body and my tongue. I've spoken in gobbledegook that people have said sounded like any number of languages. If I'm lucky I just convulse and grunt like a regular seizure, but there have been times I've gotten very violent, attacking my friends, trying to strangle myself and slamming my head into the floor. The entire time I'm fully aware of what I'm doing, but I can't stop...it's like being in the back seat of a car but you're not driving. I also get incredibly strong, though that could just be all the adrenaline that starts racing when that happens. As I said, it's usually much worse in my dreams. While I'm awake I can usually control it to some degree, but in my dreams I've completely lost it.
The doctor said it might be temporal epilepsy, which can have psychotic symptoms, but the tests they would have to do to check would be so invasive it really wasn't worth it. I've also tossed around the idea of being possessed, but that sounds a little melodramatic. I've never crawled across the ceiling or anything like that. The best explanation I can come up with is that I constantly draw in energy from my surroundings (severe empathy and all) until it builds up and explodes. I'm doing my best to create shields and release the energy, and it happens a lot less than it used to, but it never fully goes away. It's annoying.
(03-10-2011, 04:00 PM)ahktu Wrote: [ -> ]The best explanation I can come up with is that I constantly draw in energy from my surroundings (severe empathy and all) until it builds up and explodes. I'm doing my best to create shields and release the energy, and it happens a lot less than it used to, but it never fully goes away. It's annoying.
Ahktu, it's just a theory that I have, but here it is. We are talking about catalysts that hits us, but maybe a big part of being Wanderer is being a catalyst yourself. And a part of being here on Earth is to process negative energies through ourselves tranforming them into light/love, even though it's nothing we are aware of consciously. I've had a humble experience today. My friend called me up and we talked a little bit. Then she got quite for a little while. Last two times we got together her mother was dying and she had really hard time. We spend two weekends together with our families but during the first time it felt like I could cut through the air. We had really great time so it was not that, there were no heavy discussions, we kept it light being with our families. But the next day I felt how everything inside my skin was crawling. I couldn't handle much more as it felt like I was being skinned alive. So we headed home after a while. Next time I knew that I could expect the same reaction in myself, but it was not that severe, but still noticeable. Anyway, that evening I decided to talk about something near and dear to me, to "lighten up the air" so to speak, and that was the first time I told a friend about my thoughts being Wanderer, RA and all that. That info was still kind of new to me then. Today she thanked me for being there, and said that after our last talk about Wanderers she kind of lit up. And was actually uplifted for three whole days. How about that, I thought, and I was pondering whether I should talk about such stuff with others?
Anyway, what I mean is that maybe, we are walking and talking catalysts ourselves – in the meaning of processing "the air", ie energies, through ourselves, and let out more cleaniness/light/love. Well, you know how catalyst work in the car. Though we are not aware of it, I still believe that it might be so, and specially after that whole thing with my friend. That as empaths, Wanderers, or whatever we are, we clean up. Just a theory though.
And you, my friend, might have chosen specially difficult pre-incarnative task in the positive sense. Before we incarnated I was probably chicken little and agreed to only 2% of my personality being a catalyst and processing the "polluted" air, but you were probably like – what?? Nooo man I want 40%! Using touch of light here!
So I'm like a pool filter? Wow. Never thought of it that way.
i was just thinking about how i get these negative energies that i sort of transmute by going through and riding the pain of it, and it sort of becomes clean after that, like it doesn't leave but it changes, and then it's ok. and i wonder if it's my feelings or if i'm transmuting something that floated by, or that wanted my services. maybe it's both cuz of course i have to deal with my own stuff. all that empath sponge stuff resonates with me on an intuitive level, that we pull in negative energies because we can clean them. a part of me thinks that's just egotistical crap and i want to be useful or something so i'm making all this stuff up. but that's how it feels to me when i'm experiencing it, that i'm cleaning, loving and transmuting. and i hope i'm right.
however i don't have seizures, that sounds extreme, so i wouldn't put it all down to clean up, make sure it's nothing medical i'd say. you don't deserve to be beaten just to clean someone's bad day.
and like Dr. Michael Smith says, we don't always need to use the gift we came with, it's not an obligation to vacuum everyone's crap all the time, and we must shield ourselves. i still haven't gotten that figured out though, but thought i'd mention his thoughts on that in case it is an empathy issue.
i do have health issues right now, so maybe you guys are right. i have odd skin inflammations, and stuff all over my body, i'm gonna try tea tree oil. my diet is also poor because i refuse to eat anything inorganic, and it's hard for me to devote a lot of time to food. maybe my body is complaining i'm treating it poorly.
thanks for the help.
also, could you expand on the integration of all bodies? i'm sure i have trouble with that. maybe there's something in the Ra texts i need to read on that.
Last night I had a brief dream that there would be an 8-point-something earthquake in Berlin Germany, and awoke to find that there had been an 8.9 earthquake in Japan.
Also, while in a hypnogogic state last night, I had a weird dream (I guess that's what it was) of being the victim of an attempted seduction by a succubus. I don't have time to post the details now, but will try to do it after work this evening.