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Is it selfish to want to prepare for walking the steps of Light after this life?
Will asking God and loving God enough to have him send you more love
so that you can get used to the amount of love you may feel be counter-productive?

I don't know if wanting to really pass the 4D mark is selfish.
I want my mom to graduate too but I can't do it for her. I don't think she believes in this sort of stuff anyway.
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In my opinion, to prepare to walk the steps, and an in general contexture. Such as serving others, are congruent with one another. So to increase the amount of incoming, or undistorted/unimpeded flow of light/energy. One needs to become more and more undistorted.

Level of potential energy never differs:Infinite. The amount of energy being potentiated is what differs a according to configuration/blockages. In this statement I am considering crystalization as an aspect of configuration.
In my opinion certain experiences/discplines/foci and configurations can cause crystalization to occur, and there being many potentials, each being better suited for a role. So I am saying that chakras, in my opinion, have many "forms" or potential paths of types or forms of crystalization.

It also seems that crystalization is comparable to plant like growth. As the crylizing occurs it also seems that failure of transmuting incoming catalyst, and basically becoming negative in your thoughts and emotions. A type of pruning seems to occur, due to malign growth in the crystalization. Lots of polarity, and intertwined system energy is subsequently lost. It's like you have to regrow/build momentum and energy again. However it also doesn't seem to take as much effort to get flowing again. Crystalization has been occuring for awhile, and I do not no how long the process takes, I assume/seems like, at our current mortality rate, that it will be a life long process.
What is the thought that makes you feel at ease? Follow that thought.
As I understand, we are here in 3rd density, to be of service and to learn to love unconditionally.

At least that is my focus
@Agua
I could probably handle the energy. It's just that I get hypersensitive sometimes.
Well, I used to when I wasn't on meds. Emotionally. It's like my mental body tugged
at my emotional body. I'm trying not to block it now, even when I get a little
uneasy and feel like crawling out of my skin.

@Infinite Unity
I am not sure how far along in crystalization I am. I like what you say about becoming
undistorted. I do this best during meditation. When I can open up and let the Light in.
Vs when I am facing catalyst, I am usually defensive to it. Until the catalyst passes
and then I can forgive myself and allow any changes within me that need to be made to happen.

@Aion
What I like sometimes is different than what makes me at ease.
I think about anthro sex at times and I sometimes like that, but it doesn't make me at ease.
When I meditated earlier, I saw myself fishing. something I don't like to do. But I could feel
the coolness of the water and felt myself in that boat. It was relaxing. Also saw myself
walking a path. But when I saw myself alone with a boy, I got nervous and brought him to the angels.
Sometimes my scenes of serenity turn into uncomfortable situations.

@RitaJC
Yes, I am doing my best to love unconditionally. When someone yells at me, it stirs my emotions,
but after a few moments I relax and can send them love. It's hard to do it in the moment,
but I've heard that we don't have to accept the catalyst immediately. As long as we process it
later then it's fine.


Thank you all who have chimed in so far. I can feel where the Light is limited in my chakras,
the blockages, and I aim to release them. But they decrease slowly over time. It's something I
will be doing the rest of my life it appears.

If I'm meant to repeat, then I guess 75,000 years of 3D again won't be so bad.
(10-07-2018, 03:08 PM)IndigoGeminiWolf Wrote: [ -> ]@Agua
I could probably handle the energy. It's just that I get hypersensitive sometimes.
Well, I used to when I wasn't on meds. Emotionally. It's like my mental body tugged
at my emotional body. I'm trying not to block it now, even when I get a little
uneasy and feel like crawling out of my skin.

@Infinite Unity
I am not sure how far along in crystalization I am. I like what you say about becoming
undistorted. I do this best during meditation. When I can open up and let the Light in.
Vs when I am facing catalyst, I am usually defensive to it. Until the catalyst passes
and then I can forgive myself and allow any changes within me that need to be made to happen.

@Aion
What I like sometimes is different than what makes me at ease.
I think about anthro sex at times and I sometimes like that, but it doesn't make me at ease.
When I meditated earlier, I saw myself fishing. something I don't like to do. But I could feel
the coolness of the water and felt myself in that boat. It was relaxing. Also saw myself
walking a path. But when I saw myself alone with a boy, I got nervous and brought him to the angels.
Sometimes my scenes of serenity turn into uncomfortable situations.

@RitaJC
Yes, I am doing my best to love unconditionally. When someone yells at me, it stirs my emotions,
but after a few moments I relax and can send them love. It's hard to do it in the moment,
but I've heard that we don't have to accept the catalyst immediately. As long as we process it
later then it's fine.


Thank you all who have chimed in so far. I can feel where the Light is limited in my chakras,
the blockages, and I aim to release them. But they decrease slowly over time. It's something I
will be doing the rest of my life it appears.

If I'm meant to repeat, then I guess 75,000 years of 3D again won't be so bad.

It's a life long work for all of us brother. We are all distorted and have blockages. It's alot of the reason we came here. Third density is like a smelter. The intensity of catalyst, and how the sunconcious routinely brings to the forefront aspects were not giving enough attention. It's an on going process, with fluctuations being an average experience/outcome.

I would agree that working through the catalyst and reflecting on it to bring forth the wisdom, harmony, and balance. At a later date is definitely acceptable. I would say that on average, most entities who are seeking and trying to use catalyst. Grow in slow increments, and eventually come to a degree of using/learning/polarizing from the catalyst.

Now a way of coming to grasp your mother, is to understand that behind all the distortion/blockages, she is none other than you. So put yourself in her shoes. Really examine her life, don't take on the energy is, we are only examining them and coming to understand them and her. The point of knowing they are you, is knowing you and what you need/feel is no doubt comparable to the other-self. Why does she yell? Why does she do the things she does? Why is she "who" she thinks she is? I gurantee all the things that you find unbearable, and aggravating. Her suffocating you, and clipping your wings subtely/subconsciously. All are imbalances/blockages and come from a place of pain/fear/unworthiness. I would even wager, that if you were to really examine, that you would find alot of your blockages and imbalances either mirrored or were largely comparable.

Once you can find that subtle/emotinal ground,and find a way to work together, I'm sure some intial dissipation of blockages will occur, and will be like unlocking a door. I think if you really put down all the outter/surface desires, that you believe align within a deeper sphere, and really focus on yours and your mom's life and what you two need(emotionally/mentally/physically) and really try to understand her, and come from a vector of service/understanding, you would make alot of ground up. I am not you, but I think a large intial goal you need to acquire, is a form of stability and allyship with/from your mom
I'm not sure if this one life matters much for getting us ready for the steps of Light.
We can prepare, but the vast expanse that is 3D entering into 4D Light is quite remarkable.
Someone likened it to the hugs of a thousand angels, and hotter than the hottest summer day.
They were glad to come back after their experience rather than repeating 3D.
It's like we get only one shot at it. I'm not sure how much difference one life can make.
I don't plan to be a martyr to anything like that much STO that will shoot me into 4D.
But fortunately it takes only 51% STO. I don't want to live my life just to make it,
but in another sense I want to do what's right that will get me there. Including helping others how I can.
My mom is a good place to start. And I think I do well by not arguing with her.