I have on a few occasions fallen to the floor in surrendering my ego to the greater flow of love that I refer to as God. I fall naturally because its my way of my body and mind surrendering to a control outside my body. That control being the body becoming one with the Self.
It's hard to say ego because it's really meditating or letting go of any thoughts that come to mind, and when I do that with my body laying down like I was dying, I accept my faults and mistakes and embrace them...which relieves me spiritually and mentally, but physically as well. My legs have always been shaky when having worried or anxious thoughts, but I don't feel that fear or that pain stored up inside them anymore. Releasing the fear mentally, releases fear stored in the body. The fear that sticks to your cells, as they are intelligent energy as well. They feel light after this process of 'ego death,' as I see it.
The process is straining after a while. I always feel like I want to puke when I'm that much closer to giving up egotistical control (thought processes aligned with fear), but I've been unable to actually vomit. Not time yet I guess
I was wondering if anyone else as had such an experience where they were trying to give up the self to become the Self. There's NO REASON WHATSOEVER to have fear control your life. I want to feel naked again, like, nothing I do is to be ashamed of. The light flows within, and fear will be forgotten.
This is beautiful, my friend. I can relate to your experience, not in the details, but in the generalities. That is, I can relate to the feeling of surrendering my thoughts, feelings, and will, and letting these melt into the vast unity which has become visible upon the release of this mental tension. It sounds to me like you are going through a particularly intense purification process at this time. I wish you luck!
(03-24-2011, 09:50 PM)yossarian Wrote: [ -> ]What is "ego"?
The word has become misused and almost meaningless. It used to simply mean 'I'. Now it tends to be used to refer to pathological or undesirable psychological processes of 'I'. The confusion seems to have originated from the western interpretations of eastern spiritual traditions, with not too many people questioning the term.
Dissolve into the creator, the creation. Sprint through an open field and burst out of this shell. Reach for the lightning as at the end of the movie Powder. Transform and dissolve into the great way that carries to light.
This is how I describe the feeling.
I think that "giving up some of the ego" can be a good exercise, when the "ego" includes a large amount of self pride, say. OTOH, the thing (or mix of things) that we refer to as ego is, IMHO, part of living in the 3D so attempting to eliminate it would be futile or might even be dangerous, if it lets in an outsider who wants to take charge disguised as something good.
Two things help me to release fear. One was Aikido training, the other is meditation. Neither involves surrendering control of my "self."
(03-25-2011, 03:14 PM)kycahi Wrote: [ -> ]I think that "giving up some of the ego" can be a good exercise, when the "ego" includes a large amount of self pride, say. OTOH, the thing (or mix of things) that we refer to as ego is, IMHO, part of living in the 3D so attempting to eliminate it would be futile or might even be dangerous, if it lets in an outsider who wants to take charge disguised as something good.
hahahaha. You do realize this is fear based, right
(03-25-2011, 04:53 AM)spero Wrote: [ -> ]What is ego?
http://www.llresearch.org/transcripts/is..._0414.aspx
Quote:The energy of the mind could be seen primarily to be that energy of the orange-ray chakra and the yellow-ray chakra which together form what is known among your peoples as the ego. The ego or the personality shell dwells within those two energies.
I would agree that the 'personality shell' defines certain parameters for experiencing a portion of self. The 'energy of the mind' concept seems ambiguous though. Obviously all energetic bodies, and the ability to evolve in the first place (use free will, make choices, etc), are intimately related to mind. The mind is what allows the spirit to actualize and what sustains the body.
What I think is confusing people, is that green, being the beginning of transpersonal awareness, is 1) so different from orange and yellow with respect to the typical 'role' of self, and 2) orange and yellow tend to take so much of 3rd density to transcend, that we tend to disassociate some objectified part of ourselves with those lower energies.
However, people also tend to get stuck at the beginning of green, becoming overwhelmed or overly identified with the energy that it suggests. I think this happens because it is somehow regarded as a 'peak' of spirituality and put onto a pedestal as a cherished, fragile, and rare gift. The huge limitation of this attitude, or with any newly discovered awareness, is that there still is a clinging identification at work and a presumption that all 'answers' come from this energy . It's like a deer caught in headlights.
Beginning of green provides the awareness of the validity of the subjective mind, "everyone is right", the idea that we create our own reality, the notion of the witness of the separating thoughts, being spiritually "centered", the notion of harmony and relationship to all, a sense of the fullness or abundance in the present moment, etc.
It is almost as if many people need to first become overly fixated and quite lost in an unbalanced 'idea of green', in order to eventually find some place for and to actually make use of the supporting energy.
It does feel like a purification process, as these times I feel completely compelled to surrender my thoughts as "me" come randomly. The way I see it, it's my body adjusting internally to the love I'm starting to feel externally, even though this love is mentally and emotionally straining, such is the struggle of the seed pushing through the ground to bloom.
Fighting the demons within, giving up fear/doubt to a life without anxiety, knowing that something bigger is guiding you in the unknown with LOVE.
I shall have to resume this thread once I get a better understanding on how this is affecting me.
Thank you to all who chimed in.
I would suggest that the ego could be equated to the individualized portion or facet of the Creator that one is experiencing the Self through. To deny or suppress the ego is to suppress a part of one's Higher Self. To live only through the ego would be to deny oneself access to the rest of the Self and the guidance that can come through it. I find it best and most healthy to allow my current personality to express itself while maintaining a close connection with my greater Self. Its similar to being in the driver's seat of the car while simutaneously existing far above the car with the view of an eagle. The link between both positions comes as feelings or intuition and prevents the ego from driving off a cliff due to its limited view. Of course, I could not actually drive the car and create/experience the journey of my choosing without that personality sitting in the driver's seat. If I figuratively lock the ego in the trunk as I see many (not specifically here) recommending, there is no one to drive the car forward.
Surrendering the ego may have something to do with what ancient mystical texts and orders called 'initiation'.
It is said to be a difficult process, which can lead to disastrous consequences if not attempted in a balanced fashion.