(10-09-2009, 02:52 AM)Citrine Wrote: [ -> ]One of the practices I engage in is Tantric Sex/Sexual Magick/Raising the Serpent, or whatever term one cares to use for it. This practice requires two things:
(1) Retention of all sexual fluids normally expelled during climax
(2) Total avoidance of the physical spasms of sexual climax (this means no self-pleasuring, either).
Hi Citrine!
The 2 items you cite above do not indicate avoidance of orgasm itself. But, in your later statements, it sounds like orgasm is being avoided. (Note: In an effort to engage in dialog, some of us might ask some personal questions. If any of us get too personal and you'd rather not respond, just let us know, ok?)
When I first read the part of about fluid retention, I thought you were male, as fluid retention is a common practice for males, though it's important to note that fluid retention does not necessarily mean avoidance of orgasm. For example, in Taoist sexual traditions, male orgasm without ejaculation is encouraged; it's the ejaculation that is considered draining, not the orgasm.
My experiences and knowledge with such matters are more akin to fairyfarmgirl's. I have not encountered any system that advocates retention or control by the woman, at least not to the point of avoiding orgasm altogether. So I was surprised to learn that you are female. I am a bit surprised by this and rather curious what benefits could be obtained by it.
In Taoist sexual practices, the female energy is considered regenerative, and multiple orgasms are encouraged, whereas the male is encouraged to recirculate his energy (ie. climax without ejaculation), and even that might questionable, from a Law of One perspective, since the focus could be directed inward (self) rather than outward (giving to the partner in love). I have wondered myself whether such controlling of energies is actually spiritually conducive. These are ancient practices and no doubt have value, but since reading the Law of One, I personally now question traditional practices in the light of the Law of One. My husband and I might still explore some of these practices, but we now do so with much more awareness of the chakras and the emotional component to unblocking the chakras, as we now find that much more important.
I am unfamiliar with the practice you describe, so I can't really comment too much, other than to say that it is different from any I've seen. The practices I'm familiar with usually encourage expansion, elongation, and multiplication of the female orgasm, rather than avoiding it. In these philosophies, the female orgasm is considered nourishing to both male and female. Breathing practices are commonly used to enhance and direct the energies during orgasm, but not to avoid orgasm itself. (Well, to be more accurate, it might be avoided for the purpose of building up the energy, but it's always released at some point.)
(10-09-2009, 02:52 AM)Citrine Wrote: [ -> ]I've experienced ongoing and cumulative benefits from this, so I don't question whether it works.(For those who would ask - I'm doing the Solar/Lunar breath exchange to transmute the energy, and I do use it for service to others.)
You say you have noticed benefits, yet your husband is unhappy with your practice. Does this mean, then, that the benefits you have noticed were all personal benefits? Has your husband noticed any benefits?
If, as you say, this practice is being used for service to others, and you are feeling the energy being sent in all directions, then wouldn't he be experiencing benefits as well?
In Taoist practices, men are encouraged to circulate the energy (climax without ejaculation) because it's believed that ejaculation drains him of vital essence. In magickal rites, orgasm is avoided only temporarily, to build up the energy, and then ejaculation is encouraged, but the fluid utilized in some way, as it is considered sacred and not to be 'wasted.'
In either case, the fluid is enjoyed/assimilated by one or both partners. This leads to my question: Why must the energy be transmuted? If the sex act is between partners who love each other, what is there to transmute? Would not the love automatically raise the energy to the heart chakra? What does physical recirculating (at the exclusion of orgasm) accomplish?
I realize that I am now venturing into the realm of questioning the practice, which you said you didn't want to do, so no response is necessary if you'd rather not. I am just expressing the questions that were raised in my mind. I am viewing this thru my own understanding of the Law of One focus on the opening of the chakras and exchange of energies during the sex act.
Are you familiar with the searchable database?
Here are the results when I did a search for
sex.
Quote:Questioner: I have a question that the instrument has asked me to ask. It reads: You speak of various types of energy blockages and transfers, positive and negative, that may take place due to participation in our sexual reproductive complex of actions. Could you please explain these blockages and energy transfers with emphasis upon what an individual who is seeking to be in accordance with the Law of One may positively do in this area? Is it possible for you to answer this question?
Ra: I am Ra. It is partially possible, given the background we have laid. This is properly a more advanced question. Due to the specificity of the question we may give a general answer.
The first energy transfer is red ray. It is a random transfer having to do only with your reproductive system.
The orange and the yellow ray attempts to have sexual intercourse create, firstly, a blockage if only one entity vibrates in this area, thus causing the entity vibrating sexually in this area to have a never-ending appetite for this activity. What these vibratory levels are seeking is green ray activity. There is the possibility of orange or yellow ray energy transfer; this being polarizing towards the negative: one being seen as object rather than otherself; the other seeing itself as plunderer or master of the situation.
In green ray there are two possibilities. Firstly, if both vibrate in green ray there will be a mutually strengthening energy transfer, the negative or female, as you call it, drawing the energy from the roots of the being-ness through the energy centers, thus being physically revitalized; the positive, or male polarity, as it is deemed in your illusion, finding in its energy transfer an inspiration which satisfies and feeds the spirit portion of the body/mind/spirit complex, thus both being polarized and releasing the excess of that which each has in abundance by nature of intelligent energy, that is, negative/intuitive, positive/physical energies as you may call them; this energy transfer being blocked only if one or both entities have fear of possession or of being possessed, of desiring possession or desiring being possessed.
The other green ray possibility is that of one entity offering green ray energy, the other not offering energy of the universal love energy, this resulting in a blockage of energy for the one not green ray thus increasing frustration or appetite; the green ray being polarizing slightly towards service to others.
The blue ray energy transfer is somewhat rare among your people at this time but is of great aid due to energy transfers involved in becoming able to express the self without reservation or fear.
The indigo ray transfer is extremely rare among your people. This is the sacramental portion of the body complex whereby contact may be made through violet ray with intelligent infinity. No blockages may occur at these latter two levels due to the fact that if both entities are not ready for this energy it is not visible and neither transfer nor blockage may take place. It is as though the distributor were removed from a powerful engine.
Questioner: Could you define sexual energy transfer and expand upon its meaning, please?
Ra: I am Ra. Energy transfer implies the release of potential energies across, shall we say, a potentiated space. The sexual energy transfers occur due to the polarizations of two mind/body/spirit complexes, each of which have some potential difference one to the other. The nature of the transfer of energy or of the blockage of this energy is then a function of the interaction of these two potentials. In the cases where transfer takes place, you may liken this to a circuit being closed. You may also see this activity, as all experiential activities, as the Creator experiencing Itself.
(10-09-2009, 02:52 AM)Citrine Wrote: [ -> ]My husband chooses to practice differently than I do, and feels that bringing spirituality to the bedroom is a "turn-off".
I remember a Q'uo session that dealt with the roles of male vs female, as regards to the sexual act. I remember it being very profound. Unfortunately, I don't remember which session it was. I did post a thread in the Sessions in Focus sub-forum that dealt with a session on sexuality, so that might have been the one. I'll see if I can find it. You might find it helpful. For now, suffice to say that women can indeed spiritualize lovemaking in a discreet way, so that spirituality is definitely brought into the bedroom, but in such a way that the man doesn't feel threatened, pressured, or inhibited. It all has to do with the focus being on love and service to other-self.
The session indicated the different roles played by the male and female. I found that it explained a great deal about the discrepancies between the male and female typical approaches to sexuality.
(10-09-2009, 02:52 AM)Citrine Wrote: [ -> ]He feels that my refusal to climax "cheats" him of vital energies while I "steal" his energy during his climax.
His feelings are consistent with Taoist sexual philosophies and, in my understanding, the Law of One info. Both indicate a spiritual nourishing of the male by the female. Taoism encourages men to drink deeply of the 'yin essence' which is generated in abundance during the female orgasm. The female can provide this essence in abundance without ever being drained, because of its regenerative quality (the more that is created, the stronger she is). Hence, men are encouraged to help facilitate multiple orgasms in their partner. According to Taoist philosophies, a sex act in which the man ejaculates but the woman does not experience orgasms would indicate a draining of the man's energy, without being replenished by the woman. In addition, the woman is also missing the opportunity to be nourished by the orgasmic energy.
This is the traditional way of viewing it and whether it is consistent with the Law of One might be subject to discussion and interpretation, but I'm just sharing with you what Taoism teaches, For what it's worth. If true, it could explain why your husband is interpreting it this way.
(10-09-2009, 02:52 AM)Citrine Wrote: [ -> ]He further feels that my choice of this path means I'm sexually repressed and using it as a crutch.
It's understandable why he might think that. It's very common. But not necessarily true. You might just be seeking sexuality/spirituality in a different way! That is a question only you can answer. I know there have been times in my life in which I thought I was issue-free, but was indeed using some spiritual practice to avoid dealing with something I had suppressed. It happens. Your husband might be making some assumptions, but, at the same time, it might be worth exploring to see if there is any merit to his assessment. We've all had energy blockages so it's a pretty normal thing. If you decide that there is a possibility of a blockage, there would be no harm in addressing it just to see what happens. If there isn't a blockage, no harm done.
The female orgasm can be exceedingly powerful. And it can get more powerful with practice. Sometimes power can be scary.
(10-09-2009, 02:52 AM)Citrine Wrote: [ -> ]I suppose, in the terms given by Ra, my husband is "orange ray", while I seek "green ray" sexual experience.
Do you think that the lower chakras must be denied in order to activate the heart chakra?
My understanding is that all the lower chakras must be functioning in order to open the heart chakra. A blockage anywhere in the lower chakras blocks the whole process. I know I read that somewhere in the Law of One or the Q'uo sessions...anyone remember what I'm referring to?
Why do you think your husband is orange ray? Is he trying to control you? Since you are controlling your own bodily process in order to avoid orgasm, how is this green ray? (I hope I'm not getting too personal here but I'm just offering some ideas to consider.) I have no idea which rays are being activated by whom, but, in general, I would say that if there is controlling (of either the other person or of the self) with the main focus some sort of goal to serve the self, then that's orange ray, whereas if there is free exchange and a genuine desire to pleasure the partner, that's green ray.
Physical practices don't necessarily indicate controlling; ie., both partners might choose to engage in specific breath control practices for example, and this could be done from the heart and needn't necessarily indicate orange-ray control issues. I'd say the intent has much to do with it. The emotions also have a lot to do with it.
(10-09-2009, 02:52 AM)Citrine Wrote: [ -> ]Although more spiritually aware than most, he's giving me a lot of difficulty with this issue. I think there's a part of him that's saying (pardon my crudeness), "Why can't this b**** just shut up and f*** me?"
Could it be possible that there's a part of him that just wants the both of you to freely give and receive? Do you think there is any value to that?
(10-09-2009, 02:52 AM)Citrine Wrote: [ -> ]That's not the sexual experience I want.
I don't blame you! I wouldn't want that either! It seems that you are referring to sex which is limited to the lower chakras: ie., simple lust. If I'm understanding you correctly, it seems that you might be seeing sex as divided into 2 possibilities: simple lust and controlled redirecting of the energy.
But, is there not a 3rd alternative? A free exchange, that activates all the way up all the chakras?
(10-09-2009, 02:52 AM)Citrine Wrote: [ -> ]I'm a serious seeker, or I would never have taken this on, or been able to maintain it. I'm not looking for sexual advice, per se. I just really need to know if I'm wasting my time with this. Is it worth all the trouble with my husband? Am I really cheating him in some way by doing this?
Only you can answer this for yourself. I can only offer my own opinion. If I try to imagine being in your situation, I would personally answer
No to your first question, because I think the marriage relationship can be very powerful and sacred. In my own marriage, the sexual relationship is an important part of our total relationship, so I would definitely want to resolve any conflicts in that area. I'm not saying to sacrifice your own spiritual growth in order to satisfy your partner's demands! That would indeed be orange-ray. But, are they demands? Or are they genuine requests for what might be perceived by him as more love and less control? In other words, is it possible that he might be interpreting your practice as your efforts to control
him?
Is it possible for this situation to be viewed from the perspective of mutually loving and supporting both self and one's partner, instead of an either-or proposition?
From what you are describing, it sounds like this practice might be causing more discord than harmony. I would see that as a clue! But, at the same time, I have no idea what benefits you have derived from your practice, so I might be totally off here. There's just no way for any of us to truly evaluate your experiences and practices. I can only speculate how my husband might feel if I did that, and I know it would not be beneficial to our relationship. I also suggest evaluating those benefits: Has your husband benefited or just you? Was your intention for both of you to benefit? Has that happened? Do you have disappointment that he is not participating in the way you would like? (Just some questions to consider!)
As for your 2nd question, maybe
cheating is too strong a word, because it implies something owed. So I wouldn't see it as
cheating. But, I would suggest that you might be both be missing out on something that could be not only pleasurable, but spiritually beneficial, for not only your husband but yourself as well. .
(Again, this is only my opinion in response to your direct question. Please disregard if any of my comments/suggestions don't resonate with your particular situation!)
(10-09-2009, 02:52 AM)Citrine Wrote: [ -> ]I searched the Ra material and this site for any reference to sexual magic, tantra, kundalini, etc., trying to discover their perpective on Tantric Sex. The most telling thing I've found so far is a statement by a channeled being (I forgot which one) that refraining from physical expression of sexual energy allows one to "store energy". From personal experience, I know this to be true, so I have no questions there either.
I'm not sure which channeled session you are referring to. Was that in one of the sessions at llresearch.org? Or some other channeled source?
Undoubtedly, sexual energy can be stored. But if it's stored, it can result in blockages if it's not circulated. (See the works of Mantek and Maneewan Chia for more on this.) Hence, Christian priests who were expected to remain celibate without being taught proper recirculation techniques often had problems with unreleased, pent-up energy; whereas, the Taoist celibate monks were taught how to deal with these energies in a positive, constructive way.
Confederation entities have stated many times the value of sexual energy exchange. Evidently, both are valid paths. It's a matter of choosing which is appropriate for you personally. I can understand your dilemma if your choice is not in sync with your husband's choice. I hope you're able to find a harmonious resolution!
(10-09-2009, 10:34 PM)Citrine Wrote: [ -> ]I never withhold energy. My energy is immediately and lovingly poured out to everything around me.
Hmmm....that's sort of how I would describe an orgasm!
(10-09-2009, 10:34 PM)Citrine Wrote: [ -> ]One would think he'd appreciate being relieved of the burden of "performance anxiety", since he doesn't have to worry about my climax - but apparently that's not the case. It's also been argued by some that a female climax shows "proper appreciation" for what he's doing, and gives him a "reward" for all his hard work. This makes female orgasm sound like candy to be handed out to the "good boys" who manage to hit all the right buttons. Needless to say, I disagree with this viewpoint.
What you just described seems to apply more to purely lower chakra energy exchanges, not to higher-chakra exchanges between 2 people who love each other.
Could it be possible that he just genuinely loves you and wants to please you? And maybe doesn't quite enjoy it as much, knowing that you aren't being pleasured? If he's being motivated by a desire to please you for your own sake, then that's green ray.
(Note on Sat. 10.10.09 - post extensively edited to correct and clarify what I wanted to convey.)