I'll make this super short and sweet. Over the past couple of months I have been awakening at a very rapid rate, my consciousness expanding almost faster than I can keep track of it. I have gone from being relatively awake only while meditating or reading, to being awake more or less all the time, from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to bed. I find myself effortlessly radiating love more often than not.
A few days ago, one of my close friends broke his arm (a truly necessary catalyst for him, I won't go into detail but it revolves around him needing to find love for his family and realize that he is not in control of all things) So I have been spending much time with him, but since he is by nature so negative, I find him "taking and gobbling up" my positive energy and dragging me down to negative (of course he doesn't realize that he unconsciously does this). I realize that this is a kind of dual catalyst, or catalyst for the both of us, but I am struggling.
I'm not in distress of course, but I'm looking for any pointers or quotes from Ra or others that may help me to remain present with the increased time spent around a very negative, STS and unconsciously controlling entity.
Thank you in advance... love to you all.
There is so much abundance here... Reading some of the posts that have been made in the past few days has already given me some frighteningly specific answers to this query...
Thank you all just for being here.
Or should I say.... Thank the All just for Being...
Aaron, I made a key discovery from the L/L Research material. That was the idea that true service involves providing what is requested, if you're able, but it does not involve depleting yourself to provide what is not requested or appreciated.
"So I have been spending much time with him" - is this at his request? Or merely at your assumption that, if he were to ask, this is what he'd want?
What if you were to tell him that you're happy to help him while his arm is healing, but you need to take care of some other things in your life too, so you can only spend a certain amount of time with him. This could be a ten minute visit once a week or two hours a day. Whatever the amount is, make it less time than you average there now. Base it on what you can really feel good about providing before his negative energy runs you down. You could then ask if he feels this would be enough time for the help you can provide to him.
If there are particular tasks you help him with that he can't do right now, such as opening jars or sweeping, maybe you could talk with him to write down the things you could do to help. That way you and he would both get to feel good about your contribution. Your offer could be clearly defined and accepted as what helps him and what you are able to do. If you focus on the tasks you're doing that would give less opportunity for his negativity to distract you, since you'd be busy with the tasks.
In general, I believe that negotiating agreements can be a kind, respectful, and loving thing to do in many types of relationships, including friendships. So many needless frustrations can occur from differing unspoken assumptions.
I continue to be amazed at the wisdom the L/L Research team shows in how they have dealt with "psychic attack." It seems to me a key point of this wisdom is to appreciate being offered a point of view that you choose to not use. "Thank you for showing me that dismal, gloomy, selfish, terrifying, frustrating, infuriating and obnoxious miserable little sleepwalking attitude. I had forgot just how much more I enjoy my positive perspective of waking up in the light of love every day, thank you for the contrast. You've done your job to provide me that contrasting reminder of an alternative I don't need any more. I decline your offer and you're free to leave now." Obviously it might not help matters with your friendship to say these things out loud! But you can certainly think such thoughts whenever you like!
After I started thinking that way a few weeks ago, coincidentally a violent, bullying alcoholic I had to encounter on a daily basis started avoiding me, without my saying or doing anything outwardly different. I think he was so unaware that his mind was in neutral, and he was channeling negative energies. Your friend may be so distracted and worried about his injury that he's also unwittingly opening to negativity without any thought of his own. The difference is that there's obviously something positive with your friend, or you wouldn't have had a friendship in the first place.
A final idea is for you to mention, as you spend time with him, some of the things you appreciate about him and his friendship.
Hello Aaron. I do not have much to say about your friend other than what Questioner outlined, so I will comment more on your first part.
Do not fight your friend's intention or try to change it, feel it within you as a part of you. Come to terms with it. Love it. This is true compassion, and knowledge of that your friend is perfect in his own way - and then you have in the most fundamental way solved your problem.
This is what our confederation friends do when they protect the earth from 'STS' entities. They hail them in the infinite love and light of all which includes the negative entity. Then it's impossible for them to harm this planet, for they realize true compassion. To quote Ra: It would be your equivalent of running into a brick wall.
Throughout my 'awakening' process I've noticed a certain pattern. It's a wave pattern, where great spiritual catalyst comes and changes your profoundly. This awakes deep love and oneness, but it fades away after a while. There is a time of rest.
You might then think that you're doing something wrong. "Why am I not feeling loving and at peace?" you might say.
Remember then: You have changed, but you are testing yourself to see that you have. It's an echo, because when you look at the world again you will see that you do not think the same of things that seem static. That is the proof that you've changed. You will then have time to recrystallize your intention, really integrating it into yourself, when you see the changes inside yourself as outside yourself.
Do not be disencouraged when there are periods of rest of catalyst, when things seem stale and static. Trust in the infinite wonders of creation, that it's there within you, and that all is well.
(12-19-2009, 11:38 AM)Aaron Wrote: [ -> ]A few days ago, one of my close friends broke his arm (a truly necessary catalyst for him, I won't go into detail but it revolves around him needing to find love for his family and realize that he is not in control of all things) So I have been spending much time with him, but since he is by nature so negative, I find him "taking and gobbling up" my positive energy and dragging me down to negative (of course he doesn't realize that he unconsciously does this). I realize that this is a kind of dual catalyst, or catalyst for the both of us, but I am struggling.
Thank you Aaron for giving us the opportunity to objectivity look into an interesting experience and learn from it. It is always easier as a third person.
The first thing that comes to me is the 'resistance and acceptance'. It is some kind of resistance that drains the energy. In my humble opinion, he is not gobbling up anything. It is your resistance to his attitude (?) that does not allow you to be relaxed and in a let-go state. We lose or gain things based upon our intentions/actions. The others are just there to support our intentions as co-creators.
You probably need to just accept his so called negative attitude and love him for who he really is. He does not need to change for you to love him unconditionally. Accepting his choice does not change who you are and your own intentions and choices. Paradoxically this might be the best way to change him.
But again- every situation is different and sometimes the catalysts may be too much to bite at a time and then you might follow the same concept but take it slowly. By managing the time spend with him and digesting the catalyst provided before going further.
Let me say thank you to you all... Words can't really express my gratitude for using your time to help a complete stranger like me.
I have noticed this wave pattern before, however I was blind to it taking place in my own life! How silly... A rapid period of growth has taken place, and I'm now in a resting stage, just like the cycles of wake and sleep or so many many many of the other cycles we see around us all the time. I am starting to feel like I have digested this catalyst. I feel more whole inside, perhaps because I have resolved, or recrystallized, as Ayadew says, my efforts to find love in every moment, even these seemingly harsh ones.
Thank you again for your loving advice. I also thank the universe for showing me my alternative attitudes on life. What I first thought was his energy body drawing "substance" from mine I now realize to simply be a change in me brought about by a simple change in my attitude. After all, we're all very capable of acting any way we want at any time. There is truly nothing separating STS from STO, we are both, we are one, and yet we have the choice to be either from moment to moment.
Love
I have a friend who is a psychic vampire. He constantly sucks off the energy from those around him, and since I vibrate at a very high energy level at times, I seem to be a walking buffet. Being around him would often leave me feeling weak and empty inside. It was very distressing for me because I wanted to accept his friendship but I felt completely horrible every time I spent more than a few minutes with him.
In the end, I think the thing that made the difference for me was that several people expressed to him their thoughts on what he was doing (I wasn’t the only one who noticed the effects of his ‘feeding’). Being of somewhat of a dark nature, he has happily embraced the title “vampire” and is very interested in finding out more about his abilities. In all honesty I find this a little disturbing, but the important part is that now that he realizes what he was doing, he actively tries not to do it when I am in his presence. In fact, I’ve discovered that when he puts forth the effort he is quite capable of releasing a great deal of that energy and sending back out to those around him. When he does this it is like standing in a warm ray of sunshine.
Perhaps, if he accepts the possibility of such energy exchanges happening, you should discuss with your friend the effects he is having on your well-being. It is likely that, if he is a true friend, he will put forth more of an effort to control his negative energies. I’m not saying to accuse him of anything, but if he has no idea what he is doing it is unlikely that the situation will be resolved.
There are also shielding techniques that can help prevent your energies from being syphoned off in such a way. Every time I go around my friend I erect a bubble shield of light around myself, imagining all negative energy bouncing off of its surface. At one point this actually had a physical effect on him. His projections seemed to be bounced right back at him and he got a headache. He knows I shield myself in his presence and if anything seems to appreciate that I’m not expecting him to do all the work.
In the end, if you feel this is a catalyst, then there is a lesson to be learned from this experience. You can use it to somehow better yourself, and if it is a dual catalyst, it is an opportunity to strengthen your relationship with this friend. Facing difficulties together is a great way to expand a relationship. In my personal opinion, the one thing not to do would be to avoid the situation altogether and leave him there to face his pain alone without any explanation why. I feel you could be of service to each other in the midst of this catalyst.