Bring4th

Somewhere along this fantastic talk he says; "I'd rather die than not being able to do my work" Which is something I can relate to, very, very much so, and I've been taking very small steps in the direction which feels most true to my heart, but it also feels a little like dying every inch of a step, because I've been scared of it my entire life. I know I have certain skills/abilities, like we all do, but to me it's always felt like a curse or a burden because I've never learned to deal with it, or acknowledge it for that matter. As a kid I was fairly playful and excited about it ('spiritual stuff') in general but I can recall it freaked out my mom on one occasion so that's when I began feeling a bit like a freak also. And I often felt like 'the odd one out' or ostracised, like everywhere because of it. Long story short; does anyone else recognize it? This inner calling to do what you know you MUST do? Yet it's really a huge leap out of your comfortzone :-/

My musts have been to pretty much stay where I'm at. I've had no real callings. Except maybe to spend more time with friends.

I don't feel I must do anything. I do things because I do things.

To clarify; By must I mean a strong inner calling/drive that can't be ignored. When that comfortzone clearly wasn't/isn't so comfortable at all.