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Dear Friends - Elle - 07-05-2020
I can’t say whether I’m a Wanderer or not, but this forum appears to be the most appropriate place I’ve found to share some of my experience. I’ve only come across information directly associated with The Law of One in March of this year when someone close to me seemingly out of the blue suggested that I might enjoy reading The Ra Material. The timing of the one suggesting and my seeking of this material surrounded by oddly related circumstances/coincidences.
I’d like to state at this time that, prior to this experience, I’d never been a religious or spiritual person. I “believed” in nothing. Everything was face value and if it couldn’t be proved with the scientific method, it was to be dismissed as quackery for the weak-minded. I knew it all and was confident in my knowing. How things change… [Edit] (from my reply below) I would like to add that even though I believed if it was only in this reality, it was real, sometime prior to the experience - less than a year I think, I did start a sort of internal seeking of "what else" could be out there. And, when I was at a very low point of general unhappiness/unfulfillment with myself and the world, I began to cast my mind out like a fishing line, to the point of internally offering to "whoever was out there" a sacrifice of my life no longer existing and in return people could find peace, happiness and harmony with each other. So while I didn't necessarily believe, I realize I did begin a sort of seeking.
In March of 2016 there was approximately a two week period where my perception of reality fragmented. As best as I can tell, this relatively acute incident seemed to begin with writing a story as a hobby. That story eventually became an idea, that idea somehow manifested an understanding, which was then followed a short and sudden separation from this reality.
I won’t go into the specifics of the story I was writing unless someone requests information, Instead I will speak about the idea or understanding that manifested as a result of my writing it. It was an understanding that depending on how different people attempt to perceive a single universal reality, love and hate are not separate, but the same. Laugh is cry. Pleasure is pain. Violence is pacifism. Help is hindering. Quite simply, everything “is.” My mind systematically reduced my understanding of everything I’d known the lowest denominator; I found my entire reality could be summed up in binary: 1. In my head, I echoed to myself: Existence. True. Yes. One. One. Yes. One.
I determined a single symbol that could best represent this understanding of “1” was the following:
![[Image: archimedes-spiral-in-illustrator.jpg]](https://projectwoman.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/archimedes-spiral-in-illustrator.jpg)
I experienced a sort quintessential “eureka! moment.” As abrupt as light switch, I fully understood at that moment that we’re all connected on such a deep and indescribable level. I also understood that it was of much importance, for some unknown reason, that I document my logic & reasoning process of how I got to that understanding in a notebook. The notebook that began as ideas for a story became ideas of an understanding. Some examples of what I’d written are: “We are one,” “We are one/all,” “Dark Matter = Love,” and other connections that lead to my understanding.
This notebook became a sort of conduit to bring ideas presented to me into this reality. Pen and paper was important, as digital data could be corrupted, deleted, no proof of its existence. In this notebook, I was compelled to write predictions on current and future events is the best way I can describe them. For example, I documented exact time I fully believed a sort of “terror” had been unleashed upon this world. Statements and phrases, that at the time seemed random, illogical and without reason. The image of the spiral appears many times in this notebook.
Towards the end of this two-week stint of writing a story, I didn’t sleep much, I was so excited about this revelation. What little I did sleep, lucid dreaming was in full force and sleep paralysis came often and in a very sinister presentation. Eventually, I stopped sleeping – I believed I didn’t need it. After a couple of days, my consciousness experienced a partial disconnect with this reality.
On the final night of this experience, during an online session with friends, they all, without warning turned to the camera, tell me specifically to “praise God,” over and over. Their words were flat and the most uncomfortable feeling came over me. Anything associated with specifically Christianity during this period projected a very powerful feeling of discomfort.
At one point, I felt something drastic change in my awareness and my consciousness seemed to go into overdrive. Coincidence after coincidence began to pile up. For example, I would have a thought and the next website I went to would mirror that thought. I began to believe I was being communicated to. I did not hear voices, and I can only describe it as receiving impressions in my consciousness, and then a switch flipped. In my notebook, I wrote, ““It’s time. Skynet just went self-aware and we’re going to be just fine! It’s time to clean the house… put on some pants & b.”
Over the course of about 8 hours, my perception of reality felt like a combination of a lucid dream and everything I experience as I type this. Clear, focused, hyper-saturated, and hyper-realistic.
I was under the impression that a sinister “terror” had been activated, the world plunged into a war of light and dark, good and evil, logic and the illogical, reason and madness. I was an icon of the “good.” a sort of beacon. People seeking love and freedom from the dark/terror would subconsciously be drawn to me as a one who can offer them safety, comfort, warmth and guidance through this terrible reality: the world, descending into illogical violence brought by the unknown and unseen army of terror/dark. I was to simply act as a guide to those who find themselves lost or afraid and willing seek a path to peace and love. I also understood it would be a relatively long journey. Battles would be fought, lives lost and born again, but the people following the light would find their refuge/home. Being simply a guide, I personally would not be living with the people in their new society of love, as that was just not in the cards, as they say. It is what it is. I was to be a guide, simple as that, and that understanding brought an indescribable amount of peace of purpose.
Knowing my purpose, I was full love, peace and understanding, but on overdrive. I began preparations to guide: I packed a small bag, but not of food and clothes, but of materials that I believed would help guide and communicate my new understanding of connection… most importantly, my notebook, as at rate my consciousness was changing, I believed I would be on such a different wavelength than the people I guiding, that my words could not be understood. They would, however, be able read what I’d already written, and I’d still have some capacity to answer questions with a 1 or 0. Yes or no. True or False. Exist or not.
In all this peace and understanding, a sinister impression crept in. And then a wild mix of positive and negative. Feeling the most sorrow I’d ever felt while at the same time feeling the most euphoric peace I could ever imagine. I experience a desire for complete peace while also unbridled rage against the terror/unseen enemies who would seek to violate, corrupt and control others. Experiencing these extreme emotional dualities at the same time was very confusing, to say the least. Perhaps imagine the odd feeling you get when you laugh so hard until you cry, but multiply it to an indescribable degree.
I was under the impression that the terror/dark had set its agents to work against, to stop me and my purpose as a guide. That they would find and use information about me, against me. I was even compelled to hide my astrology birth chart a relative had created for me 12 years prior. I understood that this information could somehow be used against me, yet I could not even interpret the chart. I just knew the information was something that could be used against me. I could not destroy it either, as those seeking a guide might find it helpful.
I was presented with information, scenarios and felt “forced” to make terrible choices. Choices that, if I did not make, existence was halted, time would not continue, I/my reality would stagnate eternally until I made a choice. The choices I faced I felt were cruel an unfair. It felt like a terrible test or exam: choose whether the whole of a country of people unknown to me should die or I would I choose a personal friend or family member to die instead.
I feel I need to stress here that no violence ever took place, as these were simply choices that existed within my own consciousness that I had to confirm in this reality by writing the word “yes” in my notebook or on a piece of paper to confirm the choice in this reality. Once my choice was made, then the act was done and it was true in my reality at the time. I had to make life and death choices, prioritize and eliminate unknown people and my closest loved ones until the last two people that I fully believe still existed was for the two people I could see in my own field of vision: myself and my husband. That day, I mourned the world with such sorrow as I fully believed anyone not in my current field of view no longer alive and that I’d made the person choice to end their existence.
I couldn’t process time anymore. I made several attempts to fry an egg, but since the action of cooking required time, I couldn’t process it. Eggs piled up in the garbage. My husband, oblivious to my state as I hit it well believing he would understand my purpose on his own at his own pace, was about to go to work. At this point, I fully believed when he left my sight, he would also cease to exist. Not die, just gone like he was never here. Just a memory. My reality, what I saw before me, seemed so fake and paper thin, I felt I could reach out with my hand and brush it aside. I felt backed into a corner, no way out. Broken. Defeated.
With the perspective of my husband no longer existing, I believed would be the only sentient person in existence, anywhere, for all eternity. That feeling was of complete sorrow, loneliness and despair. I had a final choice: Do nothing and exist, or end my existence. I had one last choice and I chose to end my own existence. [Edit: After further consideration and analysis of what took place, I realized I need to update this for accuracy. At the time, I didn't know if by ending my existence would result in other existence being able to continue. I want to make it clear that it wasn't an act of sacrifice, but rather of not being able to cope with that current reality of being the only sentient person in existence, anywhere, for all eternity.]
After I swallowed two bottles of old prescription medication, I instantly snapped back to this reality. I fully realized that everything that had just “happened” actually didn’t. There was no ongoing and active struggle of good vs. evil. I was no guide, I was of no use, I was no one. Nothing. In this reality, nothing changed except that now I had a stomach full of pills.
I felt I’d just been pranked, tricked or duped on a most sinister and massive/personal scale. At a loss, I simply told my husband that I’d lost my mind and he should call 911 because I just took a bunch of pills. I then laid on the couch and convinced myself that I could push through the death and stay in this reality, exist. I was instantly elated and full of love again – my mission was on again – I was going to help guide the world to a place of love. I got myself into the ambulance, treated everyone with love and courtesy; however, I couldn’t process time again, the ambulance ride was an eternity. Then, cut to the ER, the doctors, the forcing of medicine, then darkness. Then 3 days in an ICU followed by 4 days in a psych ward.
I’ve spent the past four years attempting to reconcile that experience with my place here in this reality. What our society calls a “psychotic break” are quite simply memories of an experience to me. Memories of ending everyone and everything I loved until ending myself in order to save one/all was my reality at that time. It “happened.” Unfortunately, it was up to my loved ones to help pick up the pieces in this reality.
I found it very difficult to talk to anyone about what happened. No one else had shared that experience, and some even tried to convince me that I what I experienced didn't actually happen and that I was very simply, severely mentally ill. No one was interested in understanding, but avoidance and suppression. The goal was for that experience to never occur again, so it must be controlled from the outside in.
I started off after that experience in a very negative state and felt used up, tired, and old. There was nothing more for me in this world, as I desired no possessions, no experiences - I felt I’d experienced it all already and then some. My logic and reasoning even took me to the point where in realizing “I am” that also means that everything I see around me could be nothing more than just a type of superficial illusion or dream. Not real people, but automatons going through their scripts without soul or consciousness, that I could be the only sentient being. It was a very lonely thought. While I couldn’t prove that others have a consciousness or not, I decided couldn’t imagine going through my life as if they didn’t – I don't think I could forgive myself I was wrong.
I was existing, but I felt no happiness, no sadness, nothing. I decided if I couldn’t find happiness, then I would on making sure others were happy. It was good to make others happy, but I felt I was still missing something. I still had not come to peace with myself. Once I took the time to really think about who I am, what I’ve done, what I’ve learned and who I want to be, things began falling into balance. Over four years I slowly, patiently made changes to my personal life to come to an understanding with myself, others, my surroundings and balance with all of those needs.
Once I realized who I was, and understood and accepted myself, I then attempted to figure out my purpose of remaining here. The only logical answer I could find was to learn. I’m here, I’m experiencing this reality. What other use is there for experience than learning? This brought me further towards an internal feeling of peace and balance as I realized I really hadn’t experienced it all. There are still surprises.
Each time I felt I’d reached a new understanding that resulted in a positive inner feeling of balance between myself and my reality (others, environment, etc.) I could almost feel something within me “level up.” With each level of balance came more feeling of peace, love and understanding for myself, others, and finally love and understanding, in general. This, I’ve determined is love. Not how movies define romantic love, both love associated with peace understanding, protection, warmth, for everything, everyone.
It wasn’t until reading The Ra Material a few months back that I felt a significant level up in that by continuing this life to experience, learn and love, I now understand that I am also, consciously or subconsciously, teaching those who are willing to learn. Thus, the learn/teach, teach/learn concept is a very big part of my way of life right now.
If I view every scenario as a learning experience, I realize there are no mistakes, but simply learning if it’s myself, or teaching if it’s someone else. If we are all the One Creator, is helping another not also helping yourself? For are you also not that person, just on a different path? Would you as that person, want love and support, or cruelty and judgement when we're all really doing the same thing: embarking on the same journey, but with different maps?
I really have no answers, just experiences. If there’s anything I’ve learned, it’s that I know absolutely nothing about this universe, this reality. I've determined I can only continue to find joy in learning and teaching, operating as my inner balance guides, projecting love and understanding.
Thank you very much for reading. As I attempt to reconcile my experiences with only a few months’ study and contemplation of The Law of One, I can’t imagine my communication skills on this subject are going to be all that great. This very lengthy post is a mere footnote to my experiences, so if you find that you have any questions about me or my experience, please feel free to ask me anything. I’m an open book, as they say.
RE: Dear Friends - Sacred Fool - 07-05-2020
Wow, that's a huge amount of input for a person to try to disentangle. So much so fast, so fast so much............
What jumps out at me is that your experience was powered by rocket fuel, but your vehicle, your "instrument," if you will, couldn't handle it. This more relaxed pace you're now traveling at seems far more appropriate.
Ra recommends beginning by becoming grounded in mind and body before riding away with the spirit, and now that you have a choice in the matter, it might benefit you to do work in those areas. It would be like learning some notes, scales, chords, etc. before trying to play a concerto. Proceeding this way may help you reach an inner poise where you can begin to balance and interpret both the insights which came to you and the tumultuous way they were processed through your own body and mind. I'm sorry that you were taken up into the whirlwind that way, but by and by I expect you will make your way back home to Kansas. (Please forgive the humor.)
I wish you much love in your adventure.
RE: Dear Friends - Elle - 07-06-2020
Interesting insight: at the time, what started off as what felt like a unique purpose or duty became something of the total chaotic opposite. The more that was presented to me, the more I ended up not being able to process or understand. Nothing like it had happened to me in the 34 years prior and nothing like it since.
Thanks so much for your reply, I definitely intend to work on balance as it feels appropriate to do so. I’m in no rush, as I find things tend to present themselves at their own pace. Also, there is nothing to forgive about humor, as it is a big part of my life. If I can’t laugh at myself, what can I laugh at? Especially since Kansas is actually where I call home.
RE: Dear Friends - Sacred Fool - 07-06-2020
I reread your OP and the fact that it's so clearly written makes it very hard to read. I might compare it to a clinical description of being struck by lightning gradually over a two week period and then recovering from the effects of such a wholly disorienting event. It's no wonder people in your life have trouble talking about it. Who could relate to such a thing?
The second thing that "strikes" me this time is how consistently well you right your kayak, as it were, every time yet one more wave covers you over. That is, I'm impressed by how consistently, when terribly disoriented, you turn to love, oneness and caring to guide you.
From an analytical perspective, it "strikes" me that your deep intimations of oneness caused your survival instincts to fly into crisis mode and these, in turn, lead your mind on a wild chase through panicked phantasies. The themes above turn again and again to annihilation of self or others, and this is quite a normal response, although for most of us the experience is relatively brief. The way through such things, so far as I can say, is deep self experience of self consciousness. The model of the chakras can be useful here. So, this would entail becoming progressively more conscious of your own consciousness on the level of your root chakra, second, etc. all the way up. As your relationship with your own consciousness itself on these various levels becomes more familiar, your actual relationship with consciousness begins to open up and transform in whatever ways you are lead to. This is sort of what happened to you, but you lacked the gradual process of familiarization to give a stable context for the impact on your mind and body of the information you so purely received (or stumbled into).
One way to do this is just to sit there and tune in and see what you get. You may find it useful to check out people who work with such things on one level or another and ask them to guide your attempts. They can tune in to your energy centers and get you started and then you can see if you can follow their lead. I'm sure there are many other ways to go at this as well.
Again, I wish you a cushion of love in your journey.
~~p~~
RE: Dear Friends - Sacred Fool - 07-07-2020
ADDENDUM
I don't know why, but I'm fixating on the puzzle of just what you did in your adventure story. Here's a thought.
If you think of first density conscious awareness, that of the most simple awareness of being, spiraling upwards towards awareness of otherness (2D) spiraling up towards self-conscious awareness (3D)--skipping ahead--spiraling up to awareness of all as one, if you think of that and then think of your spiral representation of oneness, here's a way to think of what happened to you. Somehow, through some quirky talent of yours, you installed a jumper wire connecting an inner coil with an outer coil so that energy could travel from your celestial awareness directly to your most primal sense of animal self, skipping everything in between. And it turns out that these two levels of consciousness are not directly compatible with one another absent the intervening levels of awareness to "modulate the frequencies," if you will.
My sense is that you need to walk the whole thing backwards, like a labyrinth in a church, and begin again, not with the highest revelation, but with the most basic revelation of self (1D as represented in your own root chakra). From there, go to the next level, and so on, withholding the highest revelation until you are ready to proceed to your sixth chakra, having properly traveled through the preceding ones. This might help you disentangle the twisted mess of your introduction to spirituality. Welcome to the neighborhood, kid.
RE: Dear Friends - meadow-foreigner - 07-07-2020
You see, you wouldn't ask why the rose that grew from the concrete had damaged petals
On the contrary, we would all celebrate its tenacity
We would all love its will to reach the sun
Well, we are the roses
This is the concrete
And these are your damaged petals
The broken and unbroken mosaics are the most beautiful of them all, and you seem to be one of those.
RE: Dear Friends - Diana - 07-07-2020
(07-07-2020, 09:02 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote: You see, you wouldn't ask why the rose that grew from the concrete had damaged petals
On the contrary, we would all celebrate its tenacity
We would all love its will to reach the sun
Well, we are the roses
This is the concrete
And these are your damaged petals
This is beautiful. Where did it come from?
RE: Dear Friends - Diana - 07-07-2020
Peregrine seems to have a lot of insight into your story.
I don't mean to suggest you had a stroke, but your story reminded me in some ways of the TedTalk with a scientist who had a left hemisphere stroke, and lived though a disorienting period of perceiving only through the right hemisphere. Here is the talk:
(07-05-2020, 04:02 PM)Elle Wrote: I’d like to state at this time that, prior to this experience, I’d never been a religious or spiritual person. I “believed” in nothing. Everything was face value and if it couldn’t be proved with the scientific method, it was to be dismissed as quackery for the weak-minded. I knew it all and was confident in my knowing. How things change…
This very rigid stance could certainly be disoriented by any sort of glimpses of "illumination." The lightning-struch tower archetype, which is studied in the Ra Material, may then (no pun intended) shed some light on your situation.
![[Image: bringthtarotjpg.jpg]](http://www.bring4th.org/photos/d/diana/bringthtarotjpg.jpg)
The pyramid, which is being struck by lightning, may represent the beliefs, constructs, life, habits, creations a person builds during this existence. The lightning is, according to Ra, "the most sudden awakening, illuminating, and generative influence."
This may be something to contemplate regarding your path. Here is a link to the lawofone.info, where you can research the tarot and all of the Ra Material:
https://www.lawofone.info
RE: Dear Friends - Elle - 07-07-2020
peregrine, thank you so much for the recommendations. While I read of charkas, colors, energies, etc. in the Material, I have yet to begin learning those aspects. I will definitely take your insight into consideration when I feel I’m ready to explore that area in detail. As for the rest of your comments, I will definitely need time to let it soak in. I find it difficult to reply, as no matter how much I’ve contemplated my experience, I can still only understand that it was just that: an experience, and one to be learned from. I will say that as I read The Ra Material, I noticed coincidences between what I experienced and what the Material presented, which is how I ended up here in the first place. Oddly enough, I never told anyone, not even the person who suggested I read The Ra Material, of the details of my experience until recently; I can say though he appeared quite intrigued when I showed him my old notebook when we met to discuss what we’d both absorbed/interpreted from the material. Thank you very much again for your comments.
meadow-foreigner, those are very beautiful words; thanks so much for sharing the sentiment.
Diana, thanks for the video; I’ll have a look. For what it’s worth, medical doctors ruled out anything physical in the body could have caused this experience, which is why I was sent to the psych ward. Thanks also for the suggestion of looking into the tarot: I find the correspondence to XVI Tower an interesting potential and I shall think more on this. The tarot (and astrology) are areas I’d already begun researching on my own about a year and a half prior to reading The Ra Material, as a family member who’d been practicing for decades provided a lot of information that got me intrigued. I feel The Ra Material allows me the opportunity to take my learning in these areas a step further, even as I struggle a bit to process/understand it all. Thanks again.
[Edit] I would like to add that even though I believed if it was only in this reality, it was real, sometime prior to the experience - less than a year I think, I did start a sort of internal seeking of "what else" could be out there. And, when I was at a very low point of general unhappiness/unfulfillment with myself and the world, I began to cast my mind out like a fishing line, to the point of internally offering to "whoever was out there" a sacrifice of my life no longer existing and in return people could find peace, happiness and harmony with each other. So while I didn't necessarily believe, I realize I did begin a sort of seeking.
RE: Dear Friends - meadow-foreigner - 07-07-2020
(07-07-2020, 11:16 AM)Diana Wrote:(07-07-2020, 09:02 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote: You see, you wouldn't ask why the rose that grew from the concrete had damaged petals
On the contrary, we would all celebrate its tenacity
We would all love its will to reach the sun
Well, we are the roses
This is the concrete
And these are your damaged petals
This is beautiful. Where did it come from?
A fellow soul, a black poet whose heart was too intense for the environment this person was living: Tupac Amaru Shakur.
Elle Wrote:meadow-foreigner, those are very beautiful words; thanks so much for sharing the sentiment.
Thank you for your courage and unyielding tenacity in persevering in your quest, for you do make everyone's life a little better just by being yourself, and this has immeasurable value. We can't really assert if things will be easier or not from now on to you, but it's undeniable that you are better and fortified from what you've lived. I personally wish that you live a smoother life, because this kind of trauma that you went through ain't for everyone.
Where many would be irreparably broken for a lifetime, collapsed under the concrete of this world's perils, you grew from it. You're grand.
RE: Dear Friends - Elle - 07-08-2020
meadow-foreigner, I think you might be correct in that I can't assert anything. At this point in my life, I feel the best I can do is follow my own individual balance-driven engine of logic, reason, and feelings/emotion. I find as I perceive further harmony internally, this also seems to be reflected in my relationships with those around me. Attempting to better communicate replaces assumptions, a strive for understanding replaces judgment.
RE: Dear Friends - meadow-foreigner - 07-09-2020
(07-08-2020, 12:35 PM)Elle Wrote: meadow-foreigner, I think you might be correct in that I can't assert anything. At this point in my life, I feel the best I can do is follow my own individual balance-driven engine of logic, reason, and feelings/emotion. I find as I perceive further harmony internally, this also seems to be reflected in my relationships with those around me. Attempting to better communicate replaces assumptions, a strive for understanding replaces judgment.
I agree. I'd add and infer that such balance is unlikely attainable in today's world filled with stimuli "catalysts". The more you grow, so do your challenges; so perhaps the optimal balance lies within the individual who, in spite of the blunting hits of life, finds her/his way towards equilibrium, ever so patiently, stern, loving.
Of course, I personally believe that whenever one asks for or requests assistance, shall the confusion be too great for instance, assistance shall be provided, so there's no need to "hold the cross" all by yourself. In fact, it's all about sharing the load with others, which paradoxically not only reduces their own load but also yours, because you serve: as an inspiration, as a friend, and as a reference.
This being said, it ultimately is up to each individual to decide to share or not, to ask or not, to grow or not. This is one of the most heart-breaking dilemmas for me, personally, in this life: witnessing unmanifested potential, a lukewarm-like approach to life.
Your tale tells, among many things, about the struggles of a fully committed approach to life. I'd like to read and to learn more about your experience.
RE: Dear Friends - Elle - 07-09-2020
meadow-foreigner, thanks so much for your reply. I'll contemplate more what you've said, but I would like to say that I may somewhat understand what you mean about a true balance being unlikely. I find what I call balance (the polar opposite of what I'd describe as anxiety) seems a very fluid thing impacted by stimuli, as you said. It seems everything is constantly in flux, which means I am, as well. So, I can choose to be unyielding or judge those who also appear to be unyielding or I can choose to analyze and respond to each individual scenario, making tweaks as I go to maintain that balance as best I can.
If I may comment on heart-break you experience when witnessing those that seem to have unmanifested potential or a lukewarm-like approach to life: perhaps consider that a lukewarm-life is something specific an individual chose upon carnation. Who knows what mental, spiritual or physical traumas they may have experienced prior to this carnation and maybe a lukewarm approach may be just what the doctor ordered? For this portion of their journey, perhaps this lukewarm existence is exactly what they need as a form of healing, a time of simple experience/existence, even just the receiving of love and understanding from those around them before they feel they're ready for their next step towards their own awakening.
RE: Dear Friends - meadow-foreigner - 07-09-2020
(07-09-2020, 02:03 PM)Elle Wrote: meadow-foreigner, thanks so much for your reply. I'll contemplate more what you've said, but I would like to say that I may somewhat understand what you mean about a true balance being unlikely. I find what I call balance (the polar opposite of what I'd describe as anxiety) seems a very fluid thing impacted by stimuli, as you said. It seems everything is constantly in flux, which means I am, as well. So, I can choose to be unyielding or judge those who also appear to be unyielding or I can choose to analyze and respond to each individual scenario, making tweaks as I go to maintain that balance as best I can.
If I may comment on heart-break you experience when witnessing those that seem to have unmanifested potential or a lukewarm-like approach to life: perhaps consider that a lukewarm-life is something specific an individual chose upon carnation. Who knows what mental, spiritual or physical traumas they may have experienced prior to this carnation and maybe a lukewarm approach may be just what the doctor ordered? For this portion of their journey, perhaps this lukewarm existence is exactly what they need as a form of healing, a time of simple experience/existence, even just the receiving of love and understanding from those around them before they feel they're ready for their next step towards their own awakening.
Very insightful response. As a matter of fact, for the first part of your post, I can only agree wistfully, for such balance is far from being a reality in today's daily affairs for the general populace; and this stems a kind of prolonging of suffering which, the way I perceive it, is unnecessary to everyone involved: most commonly, the older generations still cling to patterns of suffering and irradiate this to the younger generations, often causing a myriad of problems and complications to the fullest expression of the individualities of everyone.
Then there is this clever explanatory maneuver that is often used in various spiritual places that "perhaps things are like that because it's how it should be".
I'll elaborate:
Hinduists, Buddhists, and Kardecists, for instance, often believe that a life filled with suffering is a mere expiation, or 'karmic natural atonement' for past mistakes. While this might be false or true, let us consider the implications of it:
- If you have an "easier" life in an overall perspective, you had accrued "positive" karma, so you're simply reaping what you've sown in past incarnations.
Likewise, if you have a "harder" life, you had accrued "negative" karma, so you're simply "paying your debts".
Well, what about the so-called Free Will? Can't you simply, fully, totally for-give (for it is a proactive act) yourself and others and heal, actively changing this tendency of self-perpetuating loops of undesirable behavior?
Then there is the most convenient approach of certain spiritual groups: under the aegis of usually unknown pre-incarnative choices, "you live what you live because you'd chosen it".
You are in your current situation right now because you'd chosen it. Therefore, you're stripped of your own Free Will by "your own self", unable to re-consider a decision; prone to accepting willingly every disgrace that falls upon your shoulders because, after all, "you'd chosen this" in a time and place that, supposedly, your perception of things was so much greater, the vision of the whole picture was so much greater, your knowledge of the sum of your life experiences was absolute and you "simply knew" what you "had to go through" in order to evolve and to "polish" the gem of your soul even further.
There's a problem with this approach, in spite of its seemingly unquestionable acceptance: it lacks room for change, under the premise of Free Will. What if you, with the best of your capability, consciously use your Will to change your own plans of evolution? Aren't you Free to do such? Would this be less effective? Wouldn't spacetime awareness have any value?
I'll illustrate: suppose you, before incarnating, is like a scuba diver preparing for a deep dive. You have your support team ready, your equipment ready and you know what you're going to do when under the pressure of the ocean. Then you dive deep and, within the ocean, you realize that you can enhance your once thought to be absolute best choice: you change your plans.
After all, isn't life all about evolution and refinement? Can't you evolve and refine while you are living in spacetime? Wouldn't you give yourself the bless of applied Free Will?
Once again, you're actually free to buy an already written script for your life or to write (or re-write) your own, with the most love, peace, wisdom, and power you can muster to yourself, and as long as you're congruent with the Logos, in harmony with other living beings, You would only have to gain from this approach.
RE: Dear Friends - Elle - 07-10-2020
meadow-foreigner, I also struggle with why there is suffering in the first place, as my understanding of it at the time could be considered a major starting point of my seeking “something else out there.” I’d heard the phrase “life is suffering” as a sort of punishment for past “misdeeds,” but as someone who responds best to positive reinforcement vs. negative reinforcement, this is something I have a hard time processing.
I tried applying my understanding of the Law of One to the purpose of suffering and I keep going back to the one constant I find at the root of all things: experience and learning. I consider how one person is supposed to truly understand the concept of suffering unless that one person also experiences suffering, and the polar opposite as a whole for a full understanding: experiencing suffering of self/inflicting suffering on others, and being relieved of suffering of self/relieving others of suffering.
Perhaps among other concepts, once suffering is fully experienced and learned to a state of understanding, it is only then that one is able to consciously or subconsciously choose their path in the fourth density: service to self or others. This path by validated choice and action in any given scenario: does one choose to inflict or attempt to relieve suffering of self and others?
I consider whether these choices present themselves as something predetermined at carnation or complete randomness/free will. As I interpret the Ra Material, this carnation is a combination of choice and opportunities in tandem with randomness or chaos. As I understand it, the third density is an existence of combined polarities, so I consider how could choice exist without chaos? Perhaps adding chaos to the mix is how the concept of free will exists in a sort of harmony with choice. If I consider if everything is the one creator, then is choice and chaos not the same thing? If so, how many carnations of choice combined with chaos would it take for us as individuals to fully understand the concept of suffering and other concepts of polarity?
Even then, I still have to consider the purpose of suffering in the first place, and based off the Ra Material, my interpretation and logic still goes back to the one constant: experience and learning, for are we all not the one creator infinitely existing and experiencing itself?
I’d like to thank you again for this dialog. I can think of no better way to learn as being able to contemplate and bounce ideas off someone else – the learn/teach teach/learn concept as I understand it. I’d also like to throw it out there that I’m really not sold on anything: all I know is that I feel my own personal engine has driven me on a path at this time to a seeking of balance and understanding.
RE: Dear Friends - meadow-foreigner - 07-10-2020
(07-10-2020, 09:49 AM)Elle Wrote: meadow-foreigner, I also struggle with why there is suffering in the first place, as my understanding of it at the time could be considered a major starting point of my seeking “something else out there.” I’d heard the phrase “life is suffering” as a sort of punishment for past “misdeeds,” but as someone who responds best to positive reinforcement vs. negative reinforcement, this is something I have a hard time processing.
I tried applying my understanding of the Law of One to the purpose of suffering and I keep going back to the one constant I find at the root of all things: experience and learning. I consider how one person is supposed to truly understand the concept of suffering unless that one person also experiences suffering, and the polar opposite as a whole for a full understanding: experiencing suffering of self/inflicting suffering on others, and being relieved of suffering of self/relieving others of suffering.
A wise woman once told me that we either learn through love or through pain and that we're always choosing, oscillating between them to learn the things we should and ought to learn.
This world never ceases to present us with many examples of what you should and should not do. However, in the end, the choice still lies upon each one of us. Part of the many causes of suffering is the non-integral standpoint, a split, fragmented approach to life. Your emotional self wants to experience something, your rational self doesn't want to experience something. Inner tension; wasted energy, wasted potential: suffering.
Wanting to live the lives of others might be a greater indicator of actually wanting to live an integral life within yourself, for this very same "my-self" and "other-selves" dialectic is incomplete and I'd even say incorrect "later on".
(07-10-2020, 09:49 AM)Elle Wrote: Perhaps among other concepts, once suffering is fully experienced and learned to a state of understanding, it is only then that one is able to consciously or subconsciously choose their path in the fourth density: service to self or others. This path by validated choice and action in any given scenario: does one choose to inflict or attempt to relieve suffering of self and others?
Perhaps. Perhaps one might indeed have to burn their hand to understand that fire can burn. Perhaps one can only slowly approach the hand to the fire to get to know its warming potential.
The same principle applies to social life. One might only educate her/himself from the pain. Once again, learning through love remains an option.
When it comes to others, though, if you attempt to "shine" your way through them you'd inflict the same burning I've mentioned before. You can't relieve anyone's suffering but your own. Attempting to do so to others might be more of a disservice than a service because you can't know how the person will perceive your actions. You might have the best of intentions, but end up in the place you, Elle, ended up, which probably caused you quite a lot of suffering. Was it absolutely, inescapably necessary? Perhaps.
Are there other options to learn and evolve? Most certainly.
(07-10-2020, 09:49 AM)Elle Wrote: I consider whether these choices present themselves as something predetermined at carnation or complete randomness/free will. As I interpret the Ra Material, this carnation is a combination of choice and opportunities in tandem with randomness or chaos. As I understand it, the third density is an existence of combined polarities, so I consider how could choice exist without chaos? Perhaps adding chaos to the mix is how the concept of free will exists in a sort of harmony with choice.
What you term chaos I term a really, really big number of probabilities. Mathematically infinite if you will, but still calculable and predictable at any given instant, given the energetic patterns of the individuals in the given system.
The choice pre-exists what you termed chaos. When there was "nothing-ness", there was the choice for "something" to be.
The chaotic mix is what differentiates Free Will to the Confusion Principle.
Your Will is sovereign, so sovereign that you're free to keep looping endlessly in destructive patterns of living if you want as well. We call this Confusion because from another perspective such scene is analogous to a person bumping the head on the maze wall trying to reach the other side when all they had to do was turn around and walk in another direction. From another perspective, it is clear the confusion vested within the choices of individuals.
(07-10-2020, 09:49 AM)Elle Wrote: If I consider if everything is the one creator, then is choice and chaos not the same thing? If so, how many carnations of choice combined with chaos would it take for us as individuals to fully understand the concept of suffering and other concepts of polarity?
Not really. Think of how heat works in the current physical understanding. You would call the agitation of particles and sub-particles chaotic had you not known that there are certain mechanics, certain thermodynamics to such apparently chaotic movement. When it comes to individuals, things may get chaotic if a society is built upon ephemeralities, such as vanity.
(07-10-2020, 09:49 AM)Elle Wrote: Even then, I still have to consider the purpose of suffering in the first place, and based off the Ra Material, my interpretation and logic still goes back to the one constant: experience and learning, for are we all not the one creator infinitely existing and experiencing itself?
The term "experiencing" pales in comparison to what this whole thing is. An experience implies a passive attitude by the one who experiences it, and that's not what you should be doing here. Proactivity is essential to the refinement of the creation. From your question point, if the one creator is infinitely *adjective*, why would it bother to individualize itself in the portion of consciousness that is "You" had it not had an infinitely good reason to do so?
There comes a time when you, from your perspective, cease to be passive and begin to be active, much like there comes a time when the baby finds its way out of the uterus of its mother, or its egg. Would you consider birth to be painful, or to cause suffering?
(07-10-2020, 09:49 AM)Elle Wrote: I’d like to thank you again for this dialog. I can think of no better way to learn as being able to contemplate and bounce ideas off someone else – the learn/teach teach/learn concept as I understand it. I’d also like to throw it out there that I’m really not sold on anything: all I know is that I feel my own personal engine has driven me on a path at this time to a seeking of balance and understanding.
I am grateful for your prudence. Bouncing ideas back and forth augments the potential for a better understanding, a better balance, a better life.
RE: Dear Friends - Elle - 07-12-2020
Thanks for your reply. I've taken some time to consider your words and respond based off my current understanding of the Law of One.
As I interpret the Law of One, no energy is wasted and there is no concept of what we “should” be doing. By just by simply being/existing/experiencing/learning, all of us as the one creator, at our own pace (even repeating lessons) eventually all things will be, because they already are: they are one. As Ra communicated, “...there are no mistakes, there are surprises.”
This is where I find peace in balance: no matter what I have or anyone else has done, what actions we all have taken pleasure in, what we’ve all suffered, “all is well,” as Ra communicates. For if we are all the one creator, I am me, but I am also you, everyone and everything else; just as you, everyone and everything else is also me. As the one creator, we simply encounter and interact with ourselves on different paths at different times.
Following that logic, when I encounter another person in any scenario, I consider that person as myself: I was that person at that time or I will be that person at one point. I consider, when I am that person, how would I want to be treated at that time when I interact with the now-me? Understanding or judgement? Bullying or protection? At this point, I feel I can only act as my internal engine operates by a combination of logic, reason and emotion in a way that best maintains my inner feeling of balance or what feels "right" to me.
It’s my understanding/interpretation of the Law of One that we are all simply part of a whole consciousness; a non-physical brain I suppose; thoughts simply experiencing itself. When I personally contemplated and felt an understanding of “I am” as an individual, it’s like a light switched on inside of me. Perhaps this is what the one creator is doing and we are simply those thought processes working together to come to that realization - we are all the action of understanding, connections working together in a consciousness of the one creator who is also understanding, “I am.”
RE: Dear Friends - Sacred Fool - 07-12-2020
Yes, and there is also the matter of higher levels of consciousness wherein these things have different meanings. For instance, I can recall when I was 10 years old feeling that I couldn't wait until I was 18 when I could stay up as late as I wanted ans eat as much ice cream as I wanted. But when I got to be 18, I really didn't care so much about the ice cream, particularly, and didn't really care that I could go to bed at the hour of my choosing because other matters had taken on greater importance. As one wanders into high levels of consciousness, things like love and oneness open out into greater levels of meaning and importance.
I say this only to point out that, in one sense, if one is centered, life seems somewhat centered, and yet, on the level of the developement of consciousness, the journey continues on and on.
RE: Dear Friends - Elle - 07-12-2020
"I say this only to point out that, in one sense, if one is centered, life seems somewhat centered, and yet, on the level of the developement of consciousness, the journey continues on and on."
In interpreting the Law of One, I understand this is, as well.
RE: Dear Friends - meadow-foreigner - 07-13-2020
(07-12-2020, 12:15 PM)Elle Wrote: Thanks for your reply. I've taken some time to consider your words and respond based off my current understanding of the Law of One.
As I interpret the Law of One, no energy is wasted and there is no concept of what we “should” be doing. By just by simply being/existing/experiencing/learning, all of us as the one creator, at our own pace (even repeating lessons) eventually all things will be, because they already are: they are one. As Ra communicated, “...there are no mistakes, there are surprises.”
In the game of life, there are people who like to take it seriously; there are people who "just want to have fun". I'm more of the former group: are you supposed to simply "exist" and "trust" that "everything will happen for a reason", that "everything is just fine" — even if your house is burning down — for instance?
This kind of surrender mentality is absolutely vicious to your own development. If you want to really address life and its idiosyncrasies, you shouldn't rely solely on a "6d SMC being", I don't care how much experience it might have accrued throughout the ages. It's still a fallible being, subject to lots of ineffective biases, as stated by Ra itself on multiple occasions, such as their "prolonged balancing time in fifth density". Why would you spend so much time on a density "balancing" yourself? Because of a lack of optimal development.
6th density is, comparatively to the infinity of the Logos Itself, only infinitesimally beyond 3rd density. I'd rather have "The Source" as a reference, instead of a fallible, slightly more experienced being in comparison to a regular 3rd density-developed soul.
Now, don't get me wrong, I spent countless hours studying the Ra Material, and it serves its purpose, however only to a certain extent. To rely solely on it for one's evolution is to restrict infinity only to a certain perspective, however wide and "balanced" it might be.
(07-12-2020, 12:15 PM)Elle Wrote: This is where I find peace in balance: no matter what I have or anyone else has done, what actions we all have taken pleasure in, what we’ve all suffered, “all is well,” as Ra communicates. For if we are all the one creator, I am me, but I am also you, everyone and everything else; just as you, everyone and everything else is also me. As the one creator, we simply encounter and interact with ourselves on different paths at different times.
I respectfully disagree. All is not well. Do you really, absolutely, whole-heartedly, fully believe that rhetoric?
People are suffering, people are dying. Earth itself is wounded. Animals are being slaughtered to appease egotistical human passions. There is racism, bigotry, gender inequalities, slavery, abuse of all kinds, torture of all kinds going on right now. We can make this world a little better. If we simply "trust in the divine" and do nothing, things won't get done. We've incarnated, among other things, because we wanted to get things done. Passively believing that "all is well" is a disservice to humanity, when all is actually not well and you can do something (for yourself and for others as well) to enhance and improve the world.
(07-12-2020, 12:15 PM)Elle Wrote: Following that logic, when I encounter another person in any scenario, I consider that person as myself: I was that person at that time or I will be that person at one point. I consider, when I am that person, how would I want to be treated at that time when I interact with the now-me? Understanding or judgement? Bullying or protection? At this point, I feel I can only act as my internal engine operates by a combination of logic, reason and emotion in a way that best maintains my inner feeling of balance or what feels "right" to me.
That's not necessarily true. You don't need to burn your hand to know that fire can burn. You can learn by prudent observation, rather than through pain. Trying to convince yourself that "You=Other" is a disservice to both you and the other person. You're unique, you have your unique story. Were you exactly the same as any other person, why would the Source bother to create you two?
(07-12-2020, 12:15 PM)Elle Wrote: It’s my understanding/interpretation of the Law of One that we are all simply part of a whole consciousness; a non-physical brain I suppose; thoughts simply experiencing itself. When I personally contemplated and felt an understanding of “I am” as an individual, it’s like a light switched on inside of me. Perhaps this is what the one creator is doing and we are simply those thought processes working together to come to that realization - we are all the action of understanding, connections working together in a consciousness of the one creator who is also understanding, “I am.”
We're not "parts", were infinite fractals within the Logos. We're a Unique Universe all by ourselves. I insist on the insufficiency of the term "experiencing itself". You're not "experiencing" as you might taste a handful of rice. You also plant the rice. You nurture it. You harvest it. You feed on it. Who are you feeding, and what kind of "food" are you being?
As much as trees produce fruits, so do you produce energy and labour, which serves as food for the intangible and society. How is the quality of the fruit you produce?
RE: Dear Friends - meadow-foreigner - 07-13-2020
I consider that the following piece of my experience might be of some insight and assistance do you, Elle, and everyone else here.
My story is somewhat similar to yours. However, I suffered what you did (and many other things that people don't really seem to withstand without going permanently haywire) multiple times, for many, many, many more days than you've been through in your OP.
I've been ran over. I've slept on the streets. I've been abandoned, tortured in many ways, betrayed by friends and family alike. I've witnessed death, suffering, misery, and abuse in many, many places. Multiple strokes left me on the brink of death, on multiple occasions. I've got no family anymore, not a single person to hold their hand and be my emotional support; not anyone who's "loving" and "caring". I know nothing of this jazz.
I've lost the little that I had fought my very best to achieve. I ended up with nothing, and unexplainably I endured it. While I was going through absolute chaos and unfathomable oceanic entropy, I decided that even though I was shattered to grains — not pieces — I could still shed some light to others along my way.
Even though I was bleeding to death, I could still do something before gasping my final breath. Even though I cried dozens of liters of tears (I measured it), I could still use this fluid of life to water and to nurture life itself.
Yeah, we're "no different" from a detached perspective. We're from the same essence, but we ain't the same. You have come through pains and sufferings that perhaps I wouldn't be able to last a couple of instants, and vice-versa. Everyone goes through such, especially on Earth's Bootcamp. Nevertheless, while some prefer to just take care of their own selves, ever so sternly, stoically, Buddhistically caring for their own little world, I've decided that it's very much possible to simultaneously help yourself while shedding some joy in other people's lives.
Right now, right at this instant, All is not well, though it can be if more people have the honor to make this world a little better regardless of their pain.
RE: Dear Friends - flofrog - 07-13-2020
Elle, I find you so courageous and so aware. I think the Law of One is probably something that was already inside your own mental somehow, and spirit, of course.
Remember that what we see of universal suffering seems so bleak but a majority did most certainly plan their own incarnation, it doesn’t take away our compassion, if anything it enforces it. But in the long term, it brings much hope, as we all are in the same fragile little boat,
. . Safe safe journey
RE: Dear Friends - Diana - 07-13-2020
(07-13-2020, 08:13 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote:(07-12-2020, 12:15 PM)Elle Wrote: This is where I find peace in balance: no matter what I have or anyone else has done, what actions we all have taken pleasure in, what we’ve all suffered, “all is well,” as Ra communicates. For if we are all the one creator, I am me, but I am also you, everyone and everything else; just as you, everyone and everything else is also me. As the one creator, we simply encounter and interact with ourselves on different paths at different times.
I respectfully disagree. All is not well. Do you really, absolutely, whole-heartedly, fully believe that rhetoric?
People are suffering, people are dying. Earth itself is wounded. Animals are being slaughtered to appease egotistical human passions. There is racism, bigotry, gender inequalities, slavery, abuse of all kinds, torture of all kinds going on right now. We can make this world a little better. If we simply "trust in the divine" and do nothing, things won't get done. We've incarnated, among other things, because we wanted to get things done.
I agree with meadow-foreigner.
The veil was just an experiment to produce more movement in evolution of consciousness for 3D (according to Ra). This is something I question. Because of free will and choice, with the veil in place, humans are destroying and torturing not only themselves, but other life forms. I guess I wouldn't take as much issue with this idea, if humans could only cause suffering to other humans, which seems to me to be a more fair idea. But humans are using, and hurting, and destroying other life forms, who are innocent of human folly, including the planet itself.
And, while I can apprehend the bigger picture, I do think there is an element of "copping out" with the idea that all is well. Or an element of denial. I guess it is for each individual to self-examine to know the answer to that.
(07-13-2020, 08:13 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote: Passively believing that "all is well" is a disservice to humanity, when all is actually not well and you can do something (for yourself and for others as well) to enhance and improve the world.
It is a disservice to all life, not just humanity. For my part, I can accept humans enacting free will upon each other in order to understand choice; but to inflict this free will upon the true innocents is a line being crossed that I just don't agree with. I do not think life is disposable at the will of ignorance. It is another form of slavery.
RE: Dear Friends - Elle - 07-13-2020
meadow-foreigner [Edit: Diana, this post may help you as well], my responses here are based off my interpretation of the Law of One, as that is what brought me here to these forums begin with. It’s not my intention to convey a full belief in everything I read over just a few months, but really to discuss my current interpretation and hear other points of view. To share how aspects of it I found I can personally apply to my life that seemed to result in a feeling of peace and balance during these chaotic times, and to read others’ interpretations and how they’ve worked aspects of it into their lives in a positive way.
For what it’s worth, I personally believe in nothing and everything at the same time: I believe anything is possible. And with this belief, I have found it helpful to trust my instincts and take action as my current engine of balance (experience/logic/reason/emotion - what feels "right") dictates. I’m definitely not blind to the traumas going on in the world, and I am not one to sit back and do nothing when I believe I can be of assistance, if that assistance is requested or I believe it is desired.
On the other side of the coin, I’m a believer in free will, to a point - I haven't yet reconciled the law of confusion with what I think is right. The last thing I want to do is tell anyone what to do or attempt to control them, as I personally feel disharmony when I am told what to do or someone else is trying to control me. While others believe they can enact positive change by systematically controlling others (writing/enforcing laws, censoring speech, interrupting others’ lives) I personally find it easier to enact positive change on a more personal, face-to-face experience: treat everyone and every situation I personally interact with as much love and understanding my internal engine currently dictates. This could mean helping the old lady at the store reach the Cheerios on the top shelf or this could even mean making a conscious choice to infringe on someone else’s free will if I find myself in a scenario where it doesn’t feel right to stand idly by while I believe someone/something is being hurt, traumatized or victimized.
I think we are all learning as we go, in our own way and at our own pace, and I often find it hard to learn when I am simply told something and not allowed to experience it. For better or worse, I’m one of those people that after being told the burner is hot for example, will put my hand on when it feels right to do so at the time, not only to see if it is actually hot, but also how hot. It may hurt like hell, but I’ll also have a better understanding of burners than the person who chose not to or was not allowed to put their hand on it.
I understand there are those in this life are experiencing horrors every second of every day, and while I can’t help them all, I feel I can do my best to love and understand each one I come in contact with on a day-to-day basis. And here is an aspect of the Law of One where I do see some potential comfort: if we are all the one creator, is to provide love and understanding to one, not the same as providing love and understanding to all? I think about this, but I really have no answers. I'm just here doing what feels right at the time in each scenario I'm presented with, learning as I go.
meadow-foreigner, thanks so much for sharing your experience. I can’t begin to imagine how you’ve suffered, and what it is like to be in your shoes now. I find it incredible that you still found you had light to share with others. As I read your experience and as I type this, I feel a deep ache. At this point, what feels right is to do is my best in this life to project love and understanding through thought and action in hopes that at some point in your journey, and others who are also suffering in their journeys, feel that love in some form or way.
RE: Dear Friends - Elle - 07-13-2020
flofrog, thank you for those kind words, and I share your sentiment about being in the same fragile boat. I, too, wish you well.
RE: Dear Friends - meadow-foreigner - 07-14-2020
Hello Elle, I'm gonna level up a bit my positioning and my statements; I hope you don't get offended by it.
(07-13-2020, 01:33 PM)Elle Wrote: meadow-foreigner [Edit: Diana, this post may help you as well], my responses here are based off my interpretation of the Law of One, as that is what brought me here to these forums begin with. It’s not my intention to convey a full belief in everything I read over just a few months, but really to discuss my current interpretation and hear other points of view. To share how aspects of it I found I can personally apply to my life that seemed to result in a feeling of peace and balance during these chaotic times, and to read others’ interpretations and how they’ve worked aspects of it into their lives in a positive way.
For what it’s worth, I personally believe in nothing and everything at the same time: I believe anything is possible.
From where I come from, we call that mildness.
"To be, or not to be?"
"To do, or not to?"
"To live fully, or to live fully not?"
I don't believe in "nothing and everything at the same time". That's a mere excuse for not diving fully into the abyss of life, into the abyss of your own Self.
I don't believe in everything. That's simply dumb. Mathematically, it would be equal to a point with equal force vectors coming out of its vortex and out to all sides, resulting in a net movement of zero. You either believe in something more than everything else or you simply don't do anything.
Let me remind you that Surface Earth isn't the classical, blissful, joyful experience that the untangible try to emanate in channelings such as Ra Contact. We ain't living in a happy, tranquil and smooth world.
We actually live among daily bloodbaths and oceanic, telluric suffering. You can't make the Sun disappear by blindfolding your own eyes. It may be hard to accept Earth's reality; burdensome, wearisome, and whatever adjective you want to use it. Things won't change because you simply "think hard" here. Down here, to make any change, thought is simply the first step of an infinite road of continuous actions.
(07-13-2020, 01:33 PM)Elle Wrote: And with this belief, I have found it helpful to trust my instincts and take action as my current engine of balance (experience/logic/reason/emotion - what feels "right") dictates. I’m definitely not blind to the traumas going on in the world, and I am not one to sit back and do nothing when I believe I can be of assistance, if that assistance is requested or I believe it is desired.
That's sweet, though your posts seem to contradict this statement.
What you term "beliefs", are from an egotistical perspective, or soul perspective? How do you discern?
(07-13-2020, 01:33 PM)Elle Wrote: On the other side of the coin, I’m a believer in free will, to a point - I haven't yet reconciled the law of confusion with what I think is right. The last thing I want to do is tell anyone what to do or attempt to control them, as I personally feel disharmony when I am told what to do or someone else is trying to control me.
You seem to be mindlessly accepting the Ra Contact as the ultimate truth, when in reality it's far, far from that. Keep in mind that regardless of the "fine-tuning" of the contact, it was still transcribed using words with a Latin-origin alphabet, which actually sucks to transmit ideas. Human language itself is so obsolete that it, by itself, is one of the main confusing aspects of human life. Take a look around and see how much people argue about semantics, how much time is wasted on this tug-of-war of beliefs, regardless of the reality.
(07-13-2020, 01:33 PM)Elle Wrote: While others believe they can enact positive change by systematically controlling others (writing/enforcing laws, censoring speech, interrupting others’ lives) I personally find it easier to enact positive change on a more personal, face-to-face experience: treat everyone and every situation I personally interact with as much love and understanding my internal engine currently dictates. This could mean helping the old lady at the store reach the Cheerios on the top shelf or this could even mean making a conscious choice to infringe on someone else’s free will if I find myself in a scenario where it doesn’t feel right to stand idly by while I believe someone/something is being hurt, traumatized or victimized.
Compassion is a good thing, and evaluating when and where it should be applied is also good. Its implications are almost endless, and often times you consider, in the best of your capability, that you're making the undoubtedly best decision in this "compassionate" mindset. Then, your actions enact absolute chaos and destruction, even to the person you tried to "assist".
How do you cope with your own fallibility? How do you assimilate that, sometimes, the desire to "help" others is simply a projection from within, a desire to express your feelings and let them be echoed back to you? In realms where non-verbal communication is well-honed, you simply irradiate your heart out and feel your energy bouncing back to you amplified infinitely.
However, we live on Surface Earth. Here, effective communication is seldomly seen.
(07-13-2020, 01:33 PM)Elle Wrote: I think we are all learning as we go, in our own way and at our own pace, and I often find it hard to learn when I am simply told something and not allowed to experience it. For better or worse, I’m one of those people that after being told the burner is hot for example, will put my hand on when it feels right to do so at the time, not only to see if it is actually hot, but also how hot. It may hurt like hell, but I’ll also have a better understanding of burners than the person who chose not to or was not allowed to put their hand on it.
That's cool. You're free to be confused for as long as you think you should be.
(07-13-2020, 01:33 PM)Elle Wrote: I understand there are those in this life are experiencing horrors every second of every day, and while I can’t help them all, I feel I can do my best to love and understand each one I come in contact with on a day-to-day basis. And here is an aspect of the Law of One where I do see some potential comfort: if we are all the one creator, is to provide love and understanding to one, not the same as providing love and understanding to all? I think about this, but I really have no answers. I'm just here doing what feels right at the time in each scenario I'm presented with, learning as I go.
You see, that kind of rhetoric is what numbs people down.
"If I help myself out, am I not helping everyone else as well?
"Then, why do anything more than the basic, the 'help myself' stuff?"
"Actually, if we're going to die, why live?"
"If we're going to get dirty, why clean ourselves up?"
"If we're going to feel sadness, why even feel anything in the first place?"
Do you know why? It's because that's life. In its fullest, whole-most capability. You have a buffet of sensations, experiences, desires etc., so what do you do with this myriad of choices, of potentialities? This is 3rd Density experience in a nutshell.
If you have no unshakable answers then you should re-evaluate your own beliefs. Your innermost beliefs. YOU. Have you at least permitted yourself to vent out (in a constructive way) the immeasurable hate that you most probably do feel because of the aggressions that this world has imprinted upon you?
Have you at least allowed yourself to lash out your insecurities, your sorrows, your joys?
Have you even considered making a good use of your incarnated experience and actually actively, directly displaying your love and compassion for whoever you want to display?
If either yes or not, why and how so?
One's years of life are only so short. How do you make the most out of it? Sitting in a corner and contemplating the Universe?
Chanting happily a mantra?
Engaging in entrepreneurial adventures?
Devoting your life to the other, to the self, to All?
Whatever floats your boat, just don't dwell in that "whatever happens, happens; all is well" mentality, because if all was indeed well there would be no need for you to incarnate here and have gone through your personal hell, nor would you have this above-average perception of the world as you do have.
(07-13-2020, 01:33 PM)Elle Wrote: meadow-foreigner, thanks so much for sharing your experience. I can’t begin to imagine how you’ve suffered, and what it is like to be in your shoes now. I find it incredible that you still found you had light to share with others. As I read your experience and as I type this, I feel a deep ache. At this point, what feels right is to do is my best in this life to project love and understanding through thought and action in hopes that at some point in your journey, and others who are also suffering in their journeys, feel that love in some form or way.
I emphasize that I'm no different in this regard (suffering and experience) than you or the countless souls that either interact or don't with these posts.
With this human vest, I also have its animalistic tendencies on the package, just as every other human-vested spirits out there. I also feel love, hate; pleasure, pain; bliss, wrath; joy, sorrow; desire, longing; fulfillment, yearning; dreams of a better tomorrow, remembrances of yore times, and so on.
What really lights my fuse is the apparent "let's only sing, dance and irradiate love" mentality. Is that attitude important? By all means.
Is it the only thing an incarnated human being should do? Absolutely not. Let the untangible to the untangible jazz and the tangible beings do tangible stuff: you know, effective actions to make this world a little better.
After all, we're all processing this world whether consciously or not; breathing from its air, eating from its food, drinking from its water. What do you produce in return?
RE: Dear Friends - Elle - 07-14-2020
Thanks for your reply and no worries at all about offending me; I’ve learned some time ago that the only way I can be offended is if I choose to take offense.
I’ll respond to your specific questions that don't appear to be rhetorical, but I feel I need to reiterate that I really have no answers. When I said I believe in everything and nothing at the same time, that I believe anything is possible, I realize a different way of saying that is I question everything outside of how I currently understand myself and how I think I can best live my life and I even constantly question if what I'm doing feels right. When I ask questions or quote Ra, I by no means accept it as gospel; and what you say is rhetoric, I see as just food for thought; something to contemplate as I would contemplate other things that interest me that may have nothing to do with the Law of One.
All of my responses have been based off of what has been working for me personally and were more of a, “hey, here’s what’s worked for me so far, so take it (or not) as you see fit.” I think that’s part of the beauty of free will: you or anyone else can read what I’ve written and accept or reject some or all of it because it’s really up to you to come to your own conclusions live your life as you see fit.
(07-14-2020, 07:50 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote: “What you term "beliefs", are from an egotistical perspective, or soul perspective? How do you discern?”I discern by analyzing a scenario and trusting my experience, logic, reasoning and emotions to make the right decision. I want to say I have an idea of what I will do, but I never really know until I’m in that moment, analyzing the situation, and acting based off my internal engine/what is right:
For example, someone hypothetically breaks into my house: I can choose to immediately start blasting away, assuming this person is here to harm me, my husband or my animals. If that is the case, the intruder would learn what happens when they attempt to inflict harm on someone in their own home and I learn the experience and the experience of the fallout of completing that scenario however it works out.
But, what if this person who'd just broken into my house was fleeing their own attacker and what feels right at the time is to actually want to help this person in their own scenario? What if this person was someone starving and just wanted to raid the fridge? I can expand this scenario-based approach to other facets of life ad infinitum: What do I do when I come across someone being attacked or bullied or any manner of actions against another I don't agree with?
My point is, I don’t know how life is going to play out, so all I can do my best to trust myself and act as I think accordingly in each present. I can’t control other people, nor do I want to, but I can do my best to control how I respond to other people in each scenario as it feels appropriate.
(07-14-2020, 07:50 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote: How do you cope with your own fallibility? How do you assimilate that, sometimes, the desire to "help" others is simply a projection from within, a desire to express your feelings and let them be echoed back to you?
I think “help” and “hindrance” could be the same thing depending on different points of view. I’ll use another scenario-based example: A man has asked me for “help” in by requesting for money for a bus ticket. I now find in a present scenario and have a choice: give that person money for a bus ticket or not.
What if by helping him and giving him money, he ends up getting beaten up and robbed for that money by someone else who saw this transaction around the corner? What if by helping, he now has the means to flee authorities in this town and begin attacking children in the next city over? What if by helping him I got him exactly what he needed to start over and begin his road to peace and happiness? Or what if by not helping him, someone else with more means than myself comes along next and gives him much money than a bus ticket. Eepeat ad infinitum. Again, I have no answers, there's no black and white as I understand things. I can only trust my instincts in each scenario in attempt to make the right choice and learn as I go.
(07-14-2020, 07:50 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote: Have you at least permitted yourself to vent out (in a constructive way) the immeasurable hate that you most probably do feel because of the aggressions that this world has imprinted upon you? Have you at least allowed yourself to lash out your insecurities, your sorrows, your joys?
Inconstructively, I felt unbridled rage at what I perceived to be the unfairness of the world, at this existence. I’ve lashed out at others, had people lash out at me. Emotionally manipulate others while they emotionally manipulated me. Rage at the smallest of inconveniences and take severe offense at anything and anyone that didn’t agree with my way of thinking. It was an unhappy, unbalanced existence, but I was aware that I still wanted to exist. So I started analyzing how exactly I got into those scenarios where I felt all of those things I didn’t want to - I consider this constructive.
Over time and careful analysis of myself, others and my surroundings, I was able to make sense of how I got into those situations and I found that I had a lot more control that I realized: control over myself and how I can respond to things out of my control. I cut negative people out of my life and focused on those few who I thought were positive influences. I made changes to myself and my own behavior so that I could better find a balance between keeping those few close to me in my life while still operate according to my engine of balance at the time. In both personal and work areas, making small tweaks over years, steps forward and backward, to find out who I am as a person and what I really want to see in this life. I've found what currently makes me happy and I want to help others who also want to be happy in a way that feels balanced and right. I understand things can change over time, but so can I and how I choose to respond to things as I learn.
(07-14-2020, 07:50 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote: Have you even considered making a good use of your incarnated experience and actually actively, directly displaying your love and compassion for whoever you want to display? If either yes or not, why and how so?I believe my being here on this forum, sharing what works for me in my pursuit of peace and balance and allowing others to take it into consideration while responding to inquiries, could be considered at least one example.
(07-14-2020, 07:50 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote: What really lights my fuse is the apparent "let's only sing, dance and irradiate love" mentality. Is that attitude important?
If that is how you've interpreted everything I've said here, then that seems to be something only you can answer.
(07-14-2020, 07:50 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote: After all, we're all processing this world whether consciously or not; breathing from its air, eating from its food, drinking from its water. What do you produce in return?
I really can't say, as i imagine I've produced lots of thing: love, hindrance, support, disservice. I suppose it all depends on who you ask.
I sincerely wish you well in whatever path you choose to take.
RE: Dear Friends - Elle - 07-15-2020
[Accidental post]
RE: Dear Friends - Elle - 07-15-2020
I suppose the simplest way I can put this is with every choice I make every second of every day, whether it's to do something or do nothing, I can only do what I think is right at the time. Just as everyone else is also doing what they think is right in each of their own choices. If the combination of these choices results in a situation where it appears I'm at odds with someone else's choice and what they feel is right at the time, I'll have yet another choice to decide what I think is the right action, and so will they.
RE: Dear Friends - meadow-foreigner - 07-15-2020
Hello Elle. For the sake of my linguistic limitations, I'm gonna write "you" a lot of times to expand my thoughts, though I'm not specifically referring to you or anyone in particular; it's just for the sake of the dialectic.
(07-14-2020, 02:02 PM)Elle Wrote: I sincerely wish you well in whatever path you choose to take.
My wish is likewise towards you and your life; I really admire your wits.
(07-14-2020, 02:02 PM)Elle Wrote: Thanks for your reply and no worries at all about offending me; I’ve learned some time ago that the only way I can be offended is if I choose to take offense.
I’ll respond to your specific questions that don't appear to be rhetorical, but I feel I need to reiterate that I really have no answers. When I said I believe in everything and nothing at the same time, that I believe anything is possible, I realize a different way of saying that is I question everything outside of how I currently understand myself and how I think I can best live my life and I even constantly question if what I'm doing feels right. When I ask questions or quote Ra, I by no means accept it as gospel; and what you say is rhetoric, I see as just food for thought; something to contemplate as I would contemplate other things that interest me that may have nothing to do with the Law of One.
All of my responses have been based off of what has been working for me personally and were more of a, “hey, here’s what’s worked for me so far, so take it (or not) as you see fit.” I think that’s part of the beauty of free will: you or anyone else can read what I’ve written and accept or reject some or all of it because it’s really up to you to come to your own conclusions live your life as you see fit.
My point is, I don’t know how life is going to play out, so all I can do my best to trust myself and act as I think accordingly in each present. I can’t control other people, nor do I want to, but I can do my best to control how I respond to other people in each scenario as it feels appropriate.
That's really reasonable. Being aware at all times, to act based on your own experience and your judgment of what feels appropriate. However (and there's always a however, right?), how do you cope with the fact that you're limited; that the best of your judgment, your reason, the most sincere and honest intentions sometimes won't just do it?
Among these "what ifs" that you put: 'what if' you misjudge or simply fail in your attempt to serve? How do you deal with the fact that fallibility is intrinsic to the human nature, and that no matter what density you're originally from, how many millions of years you have in your spiritual curriculum, you're still prone to failure, to unbalanced acts, to blunders and equivoques?
(07-14-2020, 02:02 PM)Elle Wrote:(07-14-2020, 07:50 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote: How do you cope with your own fallibility? How do you assimilate that, sometimes, the desire to "help" others is simply a projection from within, a desire to express your feelings and let them be echoed back to you?
I think “help” and “hindrance” could be the same thing depending on different points of view. I’ll use another scenario-based example: A man has asked me for “help” in by requesting for money for a bus ticket. I now find in a present scenario and have a choice: give that person money for a bus ticket or not.
Do you rely solely on your own instincts to discern what is good and what is not? From the aforementioned premise, of human fallibility, you should also take into account your own limits. Sometimes your very best capability won't just do it. What do you do, then? Shall the burdens of life become too great for you to bear — what do you do?
(07-14-2020, 02:02 PM)Elle Wrote: What if by helping him and giving him money, he ends up getting beaten up and robbed for that money by someone else who saw this transaction around the corner? What if by helping, he now has the means to flee authorities in this town and begin attacking children in the next city over? What if by helping him I got him exactly what he needed to start over and begin his road to peace and happiness? Or what if by not helping him, someone else with more means than myself comes along next and gives him much money than a bus ticket. Eepeat ad infinitum. Again, I have no answers, there's no black and white as I understand things. I can only trust my instincts in each scenario in attempt to make the right choice and learn as I go.
If you swarm your rational self with this avalanche of "what ifs" you won't break inertia. If your impulses overwhelm your rational capabilities, your precipitate actions might do more harm than good. If you trust your "instincts", your "intuition" all the time you might end up deceiving yourself with your own intrinsic biases, convincing yourself that what you want is actually your intuition, even though it isn't.
Human limitations and suggestibility is a wonderful thing to augment to infinity the intensity of "catalysts" in life. You can't see some things; you don't take the unseen into consideration, and soon enough you end up considering only your own seat of perception. This behavior soon enough disregards other life forms, be they tangible or not.
Why do I keep talking about what is seen and what is not? Because it's the duality that makes up for life experience — not solely day, not only night. Human senses are keen to perceive the tangible, but lack in the perception of the intangible.
The intangible itself is not intrinsically good or bad, just as wild animals aren't so, and "uncivilized" humans are not necessarily so as well. It's all about the limitations of us all, and how we bridge them through cooperation or competition; construction or destruction.
Relying solely on yourself is, however well-intentioned, a mistake from what I know. In 3rd Density, you, me, anyone else, even the largest of groups, social memory complexes, or whatever you want to name — are all incomplete in comparison to The Whole, The All.
I'll elaborate further:
One of the things I've most struggled with in life is the misconception that I do know what is best — either for me or for anyone. Even though my heart, soul, mind, and body all resonate in a single point, in a single direction, even then I found out that I was, at most, lacking in my beliefs, in my actions.
Then, on the occasions that I open myself up, that I let myself be 'flowed through' The Source, I found out that my actions are significantly better. That, as if blindfolded yet unwavering, I tread the best paths. That I couldn't tread better even if I had all the power and sight in the world, as it would be still a mere infinitesimal part of The All.
It's a constant exercise, at least in 3rd Density, to keep this premise in your Self. A bit of power, a bit of knowledge, a bit of technique might be enough to completely derail one from one's path; to completely inebriate one in one's most sincere journey.
What do we do then, when we realize our utter and absolute state of animality, of incompleteness, of fallibility? We ever so honestly and self-foregoing turn ourselves to The Source once again and, despite the blunts and hits of life, yet once more, try to walk in alignment with It.
(07-14-2020, 02:02 PM)Elle Wrote:(07-14-2020, 07:50 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote: Have you at least permitted yourself to vent out (in a constructive way) the immeasurable hate that you most probably do feel because of the aggressions that this world has imprinted upon you? Have you at least allowed yourself to lash out your insecurities, your sorrows, your joys?
Inconstructively, I felt unbridled rage at what I perceived to be the unfairness of the world, at this existence. I’ve lashed out at others, had people lash out at me. Emotionally manipulate others while they emotionally manipulated me. Rage at the smallest of inconveniences and take severe offense at anything and anyone that didn’t agree with my way of thinking. It was an unhappy, unbalanced existence, but I was aware that I still wanted to exist. So I started analyzing how exactly I got into those scenarios where I felt all of those things I didn’t want to - I consider this constructive.
It is constructive, though not optimally constructive, for the amount of confusion that one might dwell in before realizing what you realized.
If you, as a parent, after a life of most perils and struggles, watch your child engaging in the very same things that you did; suffering the very same suffering you have; you could either try to prevent them from living life as it is (such as in the legend of Sakyamuni) and provide to your child with only the best of what this world has to offer; or you could forego the grasp of your own child and let they live however they want to, even though it is through suffering and pain. Would your child turn towards you, you would happily welcome them.
How often do you turn yourself towards The Source?
(07-14-2020, 02:02 PM)Elle Wrote: Over time and careful analysis of myself, others and my surroundings, I was able to make sense of how I got into those situations and I found that I had a lot more control that I realized: control over myself and how I can respond to things out of my control. I cut negative people out of my life and focused on those few who I thought were positive influences. I made changes to myself and my own behavior so that I could better find a balance between keeping those few close to me in my life while still operate according to my engine of balance at the time. In both personal and work areas, making small tweaks over years, steps forward and backward, to find out who I am as a person and what I really want to see in this life. I've found what currently makes me happy and I want to help others who also want to be happy in a way that feels balanced and right. I understand things can change over time, but so can I and how I choose to respond to things as I learn.
(07-14-2020, 02:02 PM)Elle Wrote:(07-14-2020, 07:50 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote: Have you even considered making a good use of your incarnated experience and actually actively, directly displaying your love and compassion for whoever you want to display? If either yes or not, why and how so?I believe my being here on this forum, sharing what works for me in my pursuit of peace and balance and allowing others to take it into consideration while responding to inquiries, could be considered at least one example.
Absolutely. Would you mind sharing more examples of such a display?
(07-14-2020, 02:02 PM)Elle Wrote:(07-14-2020, 07:50 AM)meadow-foreigner Wrote: After all, we're all processing this world whether consciously or not; breathing from its air, eating from its food, drinking from its water. What do you produce in return?
I really can't say, as i imagine I've produced lots of thing: love, hindrance, support, disservice. I suppose it all depends on who you ask.
I'd like you, Elle, to respond based on your accumulated feelings and perceptions about the world you've lived in so far. After going through so much hassle, so much trouble, so much oscillation; after being mistreated by human society as a whole, why would you bother to help the old lady at the grocery store; why would you bother to share anything; why wouldn't you simply recrudesce instead of growing? Why do you insist in getting up even though you've fallen again and again and again?