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+--- Thread: hello (/showthread.php?tid=920)
hello - haqiqu - 02-16-2010
Hello friends,
I believe I am a wanderer. Since I was young I haven't felt like I belonged here or had anyone to belong to. My own mother didn't like me; she loved me because I was her child, but she didn't like the person I was. She still doesn't like me but we tolerate each other. I grew up chasing love and had several sad experiences from it because I was pushy and intrusive to those I wanted to 'belong' to. I married a man who was much like my mother; he decided he didn't like me either. We had two beautiful children who, fortunately, do like me, but we divorced after 18 years of marriage. It was ages and ages before I began to feel a sense of belonging in the human race.
After being introduced to energy work from a dear friend, who remains so today, I began a journey to my 'self'. I learned to feel and channel energy from Wicca, studied and followed the path of the heart with Sufis and walk the good red road with native americans. I have come to a sense of belonging and the oneness of all and everything through participation in sweat lodges where I finally learned the meaning of 'let go and let god' and 'not my will, but your will be done'. I followed my path which led to being sent back home by Spirit to care for my mother and to serve in my childhood church's outreach programs. It's ironic that I should now be helping the woman who was such misery to me when I was young.
I now follow the way of Mark Age, which is the same as that of Ra - same concepts, different words and phrases to describe them - but I somehow didn't discover Ra and this fellowship until now. I also follow my path through a shaman friend. My energy flows when Spirit needs it, I have no idea where it goes or how it is used, I am merely the instrument Spirit uses. I have changed and feel more at peace with myself now, while my mom is still the same. It has been good for me to be able to have oneness consciousness to hold me these past few years, although there are still times I want to pound the walls and rage in the night.
Well, that's enough. I didn't mean to say this much, and actually debated a long time before posting at all. I am happy to be here, but I tend not to talk much. I have found that Spirit is better served by my listening.
So thanks all for listening to me
RE: hello - Peregrinus - 02-17-2010
Hello sister
It is indeed our pleasure to have you among us. I do hope you do more talking here than you suggest you might, for this place (forum) would be one silent place were we all to only listen. Your words have as much weight as does anyones, and since you are a wanderer, you will fit in well. Thanks for sharing a short version of your life. I look forward to your contributions
RE: hello - wanderer4d - 02-17-2010
Welcome my fellow Tennessean and Wanderer. Thank you for sharing your story and making your presence here known. There's always a time to speak & a time to listen. Sometimes I'm not sure if I'm listening when I should be speaking or speaking when I should be listening.
Ah anyway...which ever I'm doing I'm working on doing it more & more from my place of love. Peace & welcome.
L&L
RE: hello - fairyfarmgirl - 02-17-2010
Welcome, fellow wanderer and goddess! Human Angels walk amongst us as well as the Ancients are here now through us. The Grandmothers have returned. It is time to speak and teach/learn and learn/teach. This is why we are here now.
Many of us have been with others that did not "like" us (like is an understatement for me) and sought to destroy our Beauty, Our Light, The LOVE that which WE ARE. And in the end we are are shell shocked and uncertain... yet our Light continues to SHINE THROUGH and we are HERE NOW. I Bless Your HEART with LOVE. Thank you for your Courage.
It is only through telling our stories that we learn about our own story. Speak and we will listen. And then we will Speak. (with this technology you will have to type that which you speak-- but you get the idea)
) I have found this to be a safe place in which to do so. Thank you for being here now and speaking forth. Your words have meaning and are worthy.
fairyfarmgirl
RE: hello - Aaron - 02-17-2010
Welcome to the celebration!
RE: hello - Questioner - 02-17-2010
Welcome to the forum Haqiqu. Thank you for joining us!
How do you pronounce your name here and what does it mean?
You have had many intense experiences teaching you the limitations of human love, and learned many ways to connect with the Creator's love. This life can be a struggle and it can be a blessing. Please chime in with whatever you would like to say. As far as I can tell, the forum rules here call for sincerity but not for perfection.
RE: hello - Lorna - 02-17-2010
welcome and thank you for introducing yourself haqiqu
RE: hello - haqiqu - 02-17-2010
Hello All,
Thanks for the kind welcomes. I am happy to be here and I love you all.
To Questioner: my name is pronounced sort of like "ha key koo" and it was an unintentional error on my part when I got my first email account with Yahoo!. I was aiming for the feminine version of Al Haqq which a term in Sufism for "the ultimate truth is hard to reach." I was living with the Sufi Healing Order in Asheville, NC at the time and my house was named Al Haqq because it was at the top of a hill with a very rutted road up to it, that I could not drive up, but had to walk up to - about 1/4 mile, so, yes, it was hard to reach. Anyway the feminine form is Haqiqa, but I forgot how to spell it and when Yahoo! accepted haqiqu for my user name I liked it because I knew no one would have one like it. So I kept it.
RE: hello - haqiqu - 02-17-2010
Actually I need to correct my last post a bit. Al Haqq and Haqiqa are two of the 99 names of God that I was exposed to in Sufism.
RE: hello - Ashim - 02-18-2010
Welcome to the forum haqiqu, great to see the diverse paths we have all taken only to meet up here ! Look forward to your participation.
L&L
RE: hello - Questioner - 02-18-2010
(02-17-2010, 06:58 PM)haqiqu Wrote: Sufism for "the ultimate truth is hard to reach."
Especially if you try to get there by email.
I didn't realize Sufism was that far ahead of its time. 
Thanks for filling us in with the story behind the name.
RE: hello - haqiqu - 02-18-2010
yep, and the reality of it was very real for me for eleven months, but it was a beautiful place and an interesting house :-> I don't practice Sufism today like ardent supporters do. I did for awhile, but I tend to take an overall view of most things spiritual. Sufism has an all-encompassing relationship with the universe and has a history older than most other spiritual groups. They tell students to "take what you need and leave the rest" in regard to their teaching, so that's what I did. It left a strong impression. The most important thing I learned is breath is a potent healing tool.
(02-17-2010, 03:15 AM)wanderer4d Wrote: Welcome my fellow Tennessean and Wanderer. Thank you for sharing your story and making your presence here known. There's always a time to speak & a time to listen. Sometimes I'm not sure if I'm listening when I should be speaking or speaking when I should be listening.Thanks for the welcome. I meant to say howdy to a fellow Tennessean sooner, but things get away from me sometimes.
Peace & welcome.
L&L
L&L
RE: hello - Peregrinus - 02-19-2010
You just missed another member who has gone on a sabbatical from the forum. He practices Sufism as well. His forum name is Ali Quadar.
RE: hello - haqiqu - 02-19-2010
(02-19-2010, 01:46 AM)Peregrinus Wrote: You just missed another member who has gone on a sabbatical from the forum. He practices Sufism as well. His forum name is Ali Quadar.
Ah, well. We'll meet when it's time.
RE: hello - Brittany - 02-25-2010
Thanks for sharing! I'm glad you had the wisdom to see that it's okay to try a lot of different things and learn something from each. So many people today are so hung up on their way being "right" and everyone else needing conversion. The amazing thing is that eventually you see how all the pieces come together to form one single, beautiful picture, not matter how diverse they were to begin with.
Love and Light,
Lynn
P.S. - You did not make too long of a post. Trust me. You didn't.
RE: hello - haqiqu - 02-25-2010
(02-25-2010, 05:59 PM)ahktu Wrote: Thanks for sharing! I'm glad you had the wisdom to see that it's okay to try a lot of different things and learn something from each. So many people today are so hung up on their way being "right" and everyone else needing conversion. The amazing thing is that eventually you see how all the pieces come together to form one single, beautiful picture, not matter how diverse they were to begin with.
Love and Light,
Lynn
P.S. - You did not make too long of a post. Trust me. You didn't.
Absolutely. As a Sufi teacher said: "There is no difference in the destination, the difference is in the journey." (Hazrat Khan) Keeping this in mind has helped me through some otherself encounters that were uncomfortable.
RE: hello - Peregrinus - 02-25-2010
Which reminds of the quote "Happiness is not a destination. It is a means of travel."