Someone posted earlier about Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj. I got curious and looked him up. Seems that he had been told by his guru to set everything else aside, and "focus on the feeling of 'I am'". He began doing that consistently, and was surprised by how quickly he began to experience feelings of peace and joy.
I didn't get too deep into reading about him, but from this and other excerpts I gleaned that he got to experience himself as the Creator, apart from any identity-construct the Creator is overlaid with by the time he becomes, say, a human. He talks about the distinction between watching TV and realizing that you are the watcher and not in the TV, and that was pretty clear to my understanding.
It reminded me of Ramana Maharshi, whose similar method was to repeatedly ask, "who am I?", eventually reaching what appears to be the same perception as Nisargadatta - a sense of being apart from any and all experience or identity except for Being itself.
So, I decided to give it a shot today, and this will be my brief account of this. Nothing mind-blowing happened, but I thought I'd share and see what others think or have experienced along these lines or methods.
I began by focusing on "I am"; quickly realized that repeating the words was not the answer, and shifted to attempting to "focus on the feeling of I am".
I got very little out of that, because I ended up simply being aware of my experience, but not the experiencer. The closest I could get to "the feeling of I am" was whatever I was feeling - the warmth of the energy flowing through my body, the feeling of love, etc.; but these are clearly still perceptions rather than the perceiver.
I had reached this before: consciousness itself appears to be something like a colorless, odorless, completely invisible "liquid" which takes on the impressions of whatever it encounters; and therefore attempting to perceive consciousness-itself had led me to nothing but futility. I had attempted to do one more thing having to do with separating perceiver and perception, but was firmly told not to do that because it was dangerous, so I won't even describe it here; regardless, it was clearly not the path to self-realization or what-have-you.
So, then I took a different tack: mentally setting aside various experiences or layers as not-self, and focusing on what remained. I set aside the body with all its perceptions as irrelevant; the mind with its struggling and grasping after the elusive goal of "the feeling of I am"; any emotions or cares; anything to do with this life in particular.
Having done this, I began to perceive an entity inside the body but separate from it, somewhere in the chest, who was like a driver in the metaphorical "driver's cabin" of the body, like cranes have. It was now able to move separately from the body, no longer being totally merged with it, and I perceived it shifting around in there, the way you might step away from a computer in a control room and just move around to stretch.
Realizing this to be just another "sheath", I set aside everything to do with that entity - all aspects of it at once - as irrelevant, and focused on what remained inside this entity. I perceived a presence characterized only by intense curiosity about what was happening (to be clear - not by what I was doing at that moment, but by my unfolding life in general), the way you might feel while watching an exciting movie. It wasn't doing anything - I think "the driver" entity around it was doing all the doing; at this layer, the beingness was passively fascinated by the unfolding experience, whatever it may happen to be, without judging it "good" or "bad".
Realizing that I was getting pretty deep towards the core but, also, that curiosity cannot characterize the fundamental layer of Being, I set all of that presence aside as irrelevant, and focused on what remained inside it. I perceived an ocean - not a real ocean, of course, but whatever I was perceiving was being symbolically translated into the concept of an ocean for my benefit or understanding. The ocean was perfectly still and tranquil, without any striving; it felt perfectly content, and I noticed that feeling spreading throughout my felt experience. I felt an effortless loving grow in my heart, very clear but gentle.
I set aside the ocean as irrelevant, and focused on what remained. I perceived sort of being a spark, but I'm not sure to what extent that was an intrusion from my symbolic mind and the "you're a spark of the Creator" message I've encountered countless times. Because I had to stop due to time constraints, I did not get a chance to really dig into that experience.
I had to end there because of time, but this seems like a potentially fruitful method. Curious to hear your thoughts?
I didn't get too deep into reading about him, but from this and other excerpts I gleaned that he got to experience himself as the Creator, apart from any identity-construct the Creator is overlaid with by the time he becomes, say, a human. He talks about the distinction between watching TV and realizing that you are the watcher and not in the TV, and that was pretty clear to my understanding.
It reminded me of Ramana Maharshi, whose similar method was to repeatedly ask, "who am I?", eventually reaching what appears to be the same perception as Nisargadatta - a sense of being apart from any and all experience or identity except for Being itself.
So, I decided to give it a shot today, and this will be my brief account of this. Nothing mind-blowing happened, but I thought I'd share and see what others think or have experienced along these lines or methods.
I began by focusing on "I am"; quickly realized that repeating the words was not the answer, and shifted to attempting to "focus on the feeling of I am".
I got very little out of that, because I ended up simply being aware of my experience, but not the experiencer. The closest I could get to "the feeling of I am" was whatever I was feeling - the warmth of the energy flowing through my body, the feeling of love, etc.; but these are clearly still perceptions rather than the perceiver.
I had reached this before: consciousness itself appears to be something like a colorless, odorless, completely invisible "liquid" which takes on the impressions of whatever it encounters; and therefore attempting to perceive consciousness-itself had led me to nothing but futility. I had attempted to do one more thing having to do with separating perceiver and perception, but was firmly told not to do that because it was dangerous, so I won't even describe it here; regardless, it was clearly not the path to self-realization or what-have-you.
So, then I took a different tack: mentally setting aside various experiences or layers as not-self, and focusing on what remained. I set aside the body with all its perceptions as irrelevant; the mind with its struggling and grasping after the elusive goal of "the feeling of I am"; any emotions or cares; anything to do with this life in particular.
Having done this, I began to perceive an entity inside the body but separate from it, somewhere in the chest, who was like a driver in the metaphorical "driver's cabin" of the body, like cranes have. It was now able to move separately from the body, no longer being totally merged with it, and I perceived it shifting around in there, the way you might step away from a computer in a control room and just move around to stretch.
Realizing this to be just another "sheath", I set aside everything to do with that entity - all aspects of it at once - as irrelevant, and focused on what remained inside this entity. I perceived a presence characterized only by intense curiosity about what was happening (to be clear - not by what I was doing at that moment, but by my unfolding life in general), the way you might feel while watching an exciting movie. It wasn't doing anything - I think "the driver" entity around it was doing all the doing; at this layer, the beingness was passively fascinated by the unfolding experience, whatever it may happen to be, without judging it "good" or "bad".
Realizing that I was getting pretty deep towards the core but, also, that curiosity cannot characterize the fundamental layer of Being, I set all of that presence aside as irrelevant, and focused on what remained inside it. I perceived an ocean - not a real ocean, of course, but whatever I was perceiving was being symbolically translated into the concept of an ocean for my benefit or understanding. The ocean was perfectly still and tranquil, without any striving; it felt perfectly content, and I noticed that feeling spreading throughout my felt experience. I felt an effortless loving grow in my heart, very clear but gentle.
I set aside the ocean as irrelevant, and focused on what remained. I perceived sort of being a spark, but I'm not sure to what extent that was an intrusion from my symbolic mind and the "you're a spark of the Creator" message I've encountered countless times. Because I had to stop due to time constraints, I did not get a chance to really dig into that experience.
I had to end there because of time, but this seems like a potentially fruitful method. Curious to hear your thoughts?