01-01-2020, 05:08 PM
I am posting something Cyan wishes to be posted to this forum. He is on moderated status, so he needed me to post as none of his messages were getting through.
Cyan Wrote:Hi all, I'm Aki, I've been a poster here for about a decade, I posted under many names so you may know me under a different alias, at least: Hkelukka, Aki Greus, Cyan, Hototo, Bourbon Betty, there maybe some others. So, I've been put on moderation lately and while that isnt the reason I'm leaving its a strong contributor. So, why am I leaving?
I've after being here for such a while seen the place slowly devolve into openly cult like behavior, without citing many examples I'll point out the whole feel of "sts is just evil murderers and orgies" as a main cause. It feels like a wasted opportunity to take such a balanced community and "pick a side". But as that is an established rule of the community I will bow out at this junction.
I've also adopted a opposite paradigm to the 4thD STO as "saved" or "harvested" and decided that the only worth goal is to maintain the veil as long as possible and to try to "reach higher" is essentially the same as trying to grasp the sceptre of magical power too soon and will bite.
As I said, I've adopted to a stance of 3rd D as primacy and in addition to that I feel 51% STS and 49% STO is most likely the proper choice for one trying to strive to be good. All your actions need to be illuminated and strengthened by what you desire for yourself, it is not even, in a sense, possible to work for "others" in the universe as it is.
So, I'll add the post I made about how I meditate which I wrote to another thread but due to moderation did not go through, for discussion. I'll try to answer in this thread to people and who comment and I'll be able to answer PM's. I'll cease those functions fairly quickly after posting but as long as the convo is active I'll stay. I've asked Gemini(central sun) to post this for me as I'm under moderation. Hopefully it will be accepted and we can have a good goodbye for me.
As a channeled spirit said. What if STS is right, are you content with how you fought?
In short, I believe the B4 devolved into a cult, I owe it to myself to make a well intentioned goodbye, as well as to those who might join later as a word of caution to show how I felt about it. I hope people resonate. I hope you all the best in the paths you've taken.
Here is post to STS meditation thread attached:
This thread calls to me. Lets see if this message goes through, ever since i got the "moderation" status none of my messages, the appropriate ones included, have gotten through, so, let us give this a try. I'm also certain now i'll leave very soon, was intending not to post, but as I said, this speaks to me.
Hello, I'm a negative being, as Ra explains it, I value wisdom over love, or rather, light over love, in that love should always be studied in the careful light of reason and not given into without deep study, when study concludes it is good for you then all obstacles in the path of that love should be removed with maximum efficiency and echolesness.
So, that being said, I meditate as follows.
I prefer either a sparse room, or a well populated public place where sitting just slightly out of the main path of traffic and doing my own thing, such as drinking a bottle of water, which i occasionally shake to denote interest in things like "well spoken, random background conversation, that was illuminating". If im at a sparse room such as my own appartment I prefer to have a large playlist of all my collected musics and videos from favorite TV shows to all random songs i've ever heard to every game characters every spoken line and grunt. I put this playlist on the randomizer and ask the spirit of meditation/relaxation/core/myself/god to play the playlist like a finely tuned instrument to me. I then listen to what the universe has to say, i at the same time usually lie down in my comfortable, yet sparse, bed with a blanket and a pillow and listen intently. Sometimes this dialogue goes on for days and weeks, sometimes its only a few minutes, during this entire time I bombard myself with every negative thought about myself I can find, every dragon and demon and run straight towards them at full speed. They all dissapear without fail. Only the things that I have an emotional contact with remain. That way after a while of listening to "just chaos" there is an "order to it" and the universe makes sense, in a way, god is talking to me.
Your results may vary, as others smartly said, everyones method varies.
Anyway, hope this contributes.
Currently at ->http://gallareue.boards.net/thread/171/cenala-chalana-goddess-health-nature?page=122
Cenala clearly guided me.
Cenala's blessing with you. May you always walk with feet tethered in the light of your own reason.