About my mother: Help.

[Melissa]

Very insightful post icaro, thank you!

[palindromic]

It sounds like she has a severe sacral / orange chakra blockage. Several hints of this is the rape that happened and also her over use of speech (blue/throat are often related in some ways to the orange/sacral).

Her intent for this "spiritual community" should be questioned further. See what her true goals are for the matter. See what she's trying to accomplish here. It is possible she is trying to achieve some sort of position of power within this community of hers. Her desire for 'secrecy' is also a sign of the darkness which should be further questioned. Also, never lower your vibration. Balance every single chakra to the best of your ability.

My heart goes out to you, truly. 15 is a terrible time for a mother to abandon a child. Remember that this has formed and shaped you in a way that was intended right from the beginning. Avoid making choices to try and prove your worth to her or to attempt to make her proud. You are worthy and full of love and pride without her blessing.

Remember, when you do stand up to her:
Don't respond with a negative emotional response. Be calm, chose your words carefully. Allow her to express herself, but remember to be entirely honest right down to the last letter.

Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that makes flowers grow, not thunder - Rumi

[Melissa]

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[reeay]

You're doing awesome! Yeah we can't change others or do the work for them so doing own work is the way to go. Since you began to find more acceptance and balance w/ self, do you notice anything different perhaps, in your relationship with your mother or maybe in how you see your mother?

[Melissa]

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[caycegal]

Dear Friend,

This came to me this morning while I was walking and thinking about your situation, which, I am sure, resonates with so many of us who have similar situations or have lived through similar.

Remember, only you can decide what is right for you, so please take my advice with a grain of salt - I want to share it with you in case any of it may be helpful.

1. Don't try to make any large decisions right now - instead make many small steps. Make connections and friends with people outside your family. Join a "spiritual support group," if possible one that incorporates prayer and meditation. Instead of trying to force yourself to make that large jump to "leave" your mother, make many small jumps every day. Choose to spend some time at a church, a meditation group, a therapy group, any place where you can make positive connections with other people.

2. Ask for guidance and help ("prayer") from whatever spiritual guides you believe in, whether it is Jesus, Ra, Seth, an angel, a "saint," the Great Spirit, anything that you can believe is there and will hear you. It doesn't matter "who" you pray to - the important thing is to ask for help and believe you will receive it.

3. Learn to listen to your feelings. Very few people are "evil." That weird feeling you get sometimes IS important - it is telling you something. Specifically it is giving you guidance. Good feeling = I am on the right path right now. Bad feeling = be careful, someone or my own ego is trying to get me to do something that may not be helpful to myself or others.

Have a great, joyful day, and thanks for listening. Use this advice only if it is helpful, and know there are many here in this thread sending you love and positive energy.

PS - I see from reading more that you have made much progress already. Congratulations, friend.

[Melissa]

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[Melissa]

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[Melissa]

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[bosphorus]

Ok, I'm really scared that I'll explode if my mom keeps trying to set me up for a meeting or whatever, for her community. I've already said (numerous times) that I won't be a part of it and that I'll be moving on, when possible. Or, when I've figured out what I want to do with my life.
My mind just goes on and on about it and I don't really know how to communicate with her because I tend to think/feel very different. So when I'm there I just sit there, nodding. That's it. I don't mind compromising for the sake of peace but this is a bit much, really.

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Melissa, i'd like to ask a question. Are you a Taurian? i say this because i thought taurian children would get along with sagitarius parent

[reeay]

You have to look at the overall chart to assess relationships between parents in astrology (i.e., sun sign astrology only tells us <10% of the story… make that about 1%).

Melissa - I have major blue ray issues w/ my mother too. Sometimes we communicate and connect great and sometimes it explodes due to holding things in then blowing up later. She gets rigid about certain things & massively projects onto me. I find myself projecting back at her thru anger. Think this last episode she was a bit tipsy and blowing off steam bc she was repressing some negative emotion… but we went all out. So I wrote her a email about how I feel and what I think about the episode, read it several times, then deleted it. Felt better even if she doesn't really know how I feel and think. At least I came to an understanding of self & of her, and why we acted the way we acted to each other. We actually haven't talked about this episode to put some closure (yep blue ray issue again) but down the road we sure will talk about this episode, if the patterns in the relationship is constant.

[Melissa]

@bosphorus I'm half Taurean, half Pisces.

[bosphorus]

hmmm pisces asc. assuming you are pretty merciful

[Melissa]

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[reeay]

Yeah that's tough indeed.

The suicidality part… in most cases it's a 'cry for help', meaning people say they will commit suicide bc they need to express their internal pains in a way where the other self will give comfort to them. See how distressed I am, I need you desperately, etc. Sometimes it's a way to express one's need for reassurance that we love them and care for them bc they are unsure where they stand with the other. People try to reach out to others in ways that seem pretty radical. Like talking a lot, nagging, saying 'i'm going to die', initiating fights… these could be an attempt at reaching-out and trying to find reassurance that some bond exists between self and other self. Just ineffective way to communicate or ask for reassurance.

If she has history of attempting suicide and/or have a plan & the tools to commit suicide, those are evidence that she is getting ready to go.

If blue ray's stuck I think one way to go is possibly working on lower ray blockages (bc I'm assuming there's a connection between blue ray blockage and blockages in the rays 'below' it?). At least thru that process we might gain some insight on why blue is blocked and possibly how we can go about working with communication issues.

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Btw astrologically, if you want to know about the mother-child relationship, you look at moon signs in either charts. Sun is more indicative of you, your 'hero' (who you kind of aspire to be).

[Melissa]

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[Melissa]

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