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    Bring4th Bring4th Studies Spiritual Development & Metaphysical Matters Regrets?

    Thread: Regrets?


    Plenum (Offline)

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    #1
    04-27-2015, 11:42 PM
    Gemini Wolf's recent thread got me thinking a bit.

    namely, a few thoughts about the nature of Regret.

    on the surface, there would seem to be 2 types of regret:

    1) regret for things done - because they hurt someone, you hurt yourself, or you got into a situation that is still ongoing (and unpleasant/unwanted).

    2) regret for things not done - either opportunities not taken, for not being adventurous enough, or bold enough

    at the end of the day, what was done (or not done) can't change.  That's history.  But the nature of regret begs the question - how can I approach this feeling/emotion of regret?

    I think that if one utilises and processes experience for it's understanding and learning potential, the feeling of regret should fade.  After all, at the end of the day, we are living in a transient physical experience, and all that will be left are the memories and our interpretations of them.  There is nothing, quite literally, we can take with us.

    If we process experience for case 1) above, regrets about things we did, and wish we didn't, we can learn which things were harmful, naive, ill-advised, poorly thought out, or were lacking love.  We can choose to not take that path of action in the future, if similiar circumstances presented themselves.  

    if we process experience for case number 2), then maybe we will be more responsive and more ready to take opportunities, when they arise in the future.  And opportunities will always arise.  Maybe not the exact same ones, but the material experience is always in flux, and things will present themselves if they are willing.  But the feeling of regret will linger if the past experiences are not processed for a certain understanding of wisdom.
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      • isis, Alexis, Stranger, Steppingfeet
    isis (Offline)

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    #2
    04-28-2015, 12:28 AM
    (04-27-2015, 11:42 PM)Bring4th_Plenum Wrote: how can I approach this feeling/emotion of regret?

    I accept it. I try not to dislike regretting things. When people say they have no regrets I seriously doubt they're being honest with themselves.

    IMO, regretting is simply the mind displaying preferences. We can't help but have preferences. It's not necessarily a negative thing that we should strive to be rid of I don't think but I do try not to dwell on the things I regret.

    There are many things I regret that I'll continue regretting as long as I'm able. I add things to my 'list of things I regret' pretty much daily.
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      • Alexis
    Minyatur (Offline)

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    #3
    04-28-2015, 12:40 AM (This post was last modified: 04-28-2015, 12:56 AM by Minyatur.)
    (04-28-2015, 12:28 AM)isis Wrote:
    (04-27-2015, 11:42 PM)Bring4th_Plenum Wrote: how can I approach this feeling/emotion of regret?

    I accept it. I try not to dislike regretting things. When people say they have no regrets I seriously doubt they're being honest with themselves.

    IMO, regretting is simply the mind displaying preferences. We can't help but have preferences. It's not necessarily a negative thing that we should strive to be rid of I don't think but I do try not to dwell on the things I regret.

    There are many things I regret that I'll continue regretting as long as I'm able. I add things to my 'list of things I regret' pretty much daily.

    I wouldn't say I've never regretted things in the past (small temporary things) but I do not hold regret except maybe one thing which may have happened for the best as it did.

    I might add I'm not so old, maybe regrets will come later on.

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    anagogy Away

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    #4
    04-28-2015, 02:05 AM
    I try to content myself with the thought that if I am unable to do what I needed to do in this life, I will have another opportunity in a future life.  Having said that, I will do my best with this one, and try to forgive myself for all missteps in the process.

    I feel regret at times, but that emotion seems to arise because I'm focusing on missed opportunities.  I try to pivot from those thoughts to anticipation of new potential opportunities.  This brings me a measure of peace.  
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      • Stranger
    Matt1 Away

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    #5
    04-28-2015, 06:59 AM
    Its interesting to note that in both of those examples, one is in the past or the future, not in the present moment.
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      • anagogy, Stranger
    anagogy Away

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    #6
    04-28-2015, 03:33 PM
    (04-28-2015, 06:59 AM)Matt1 Wrote: Its interesting to note that in both of those examples, one is in the past or the future, not in the present moment.

    That is a great point Matt1. The past is the source of regret, and the future the source of anxiety. The NOW is where the peace is, ala Eckhart Tolle. Thanks for the reminder, I needed that.
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    Jeremy (Offline)

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    #7
    04-28-2015, 03:41 PM
    Simply stop regretting the moments and realize that there is nothing to regret in the first place. Everything happened the way it was supposed to to get you to this point in your life . I know it's more difficult than that to some but it's just another switch to flip in the Mind.

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    isis (Offline)

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    #8
    04-28-2015, 03:54 PM
    (04-28-2015, 03:33 PM)anagogy Wrote:
    (04-28-2015, 06:59 AM)Matt1 Wrote: Its interesting to note that in both of those examples, one is in the past or the future, not in the present moment.

    That is a great point Matt1.  The past is the source of regret, and the future the source of anxiety.  The NOW is where the peace is, ala Eckhart Tolle.  Thanks for the reminder, I needed that.

    I feel that thinking about the past & future, more often than not, enriches my now rather than causes me to not be in it.

    I love thinking about funny things from my past. I've witnessed some hilarious things. Often times I burst out laughing when reminiscing. It's always kind of awkward when someone asks me what's funny when that happens. I've gotten to where I usually just say, "Thinking about something that happened a long time ago." & I love thinking about the future bc there's so many positive & uplifting possibilities to look fwd to.
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      • anagogy
    Aion (Offline)

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    #9
    04-28-2015, 03:56 PM
    I think there's a big difference between thinking about the past or future and dwelling on it.

      •
    isis (Offline)

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    #10
    04-28-2015, 04:00 PM
    (04-28-2015, 03:41 PM)Jeremy Wrote: Simply stop regretting the moments and realize that there  is nothing to regret in the first place. Everything happened the way it was supposed to to get you to this point in your life . I know it's more difficult than that to some but it's just another switch to flip in the Mind.

    I believe that everything happens the way it's suppose to...however, I also believe it's okay to prefer that things had gone down a different way than they had to.

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    isis (Offline)

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    #11
    04-28-2015, 04:02 PM
    (04-28-2015, 03:56 PM)Tan.rar Wrote: I think there's a big difference between thinking about the past or future and dwelling on it.

    True. & regret isn't defined as something you dwell on. I think regrets are fine so long as you don't dwell on them.

      •
    anagogy Away

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    #12
    04-28-2015, 04:24 PM
    (04-28-2015, 03:54 PM)isis Wrote: I feel that thinking about the past & future, more often than not, enriches my now rather than causes me to not be in it.

    I love thinking about funny things from my past. I've witnessed some hilarious things. Often times I burst out laughing when reminiscing. It's always kind of awkward when someone asks me what's funny when that happens. I've gotten to where I usually just say, "Thinking about something that happened a long time ago." & I love thinking about the future bc there's so many positive & uplifting possibilities to look fwd to.

    I agree completely.
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      • isis
    Aion (Offline)

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    #13
    04-28-2015, 04:46 PM
    Sometimes I regret eating too much chocolate and then eat more.
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      • isis, sunnysideup
    isis (Offline)

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    #14
    04-28-2015, 05:24 PM
    (04-28-2015, 04:46 PM)Tan.rar Wrote: Sometimes I regret eating too much chocolate and then eat more.

    lol me too. Regret doesn't hold much power over me either. Sometimes before doing/saying something I think, "I'll regret this." & then I do/say it anyway.

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    Aion (Offline)

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    #15
    04-28-2015, 05:25 PM
    I think regret can sometimes be our personal boogeyman.
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      • isis
    AnthroHeart (Offline)

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    #16
    04-28-2015, 05:30 PM
    If I hadn't had hurt those other kids when I was a kid, I wouldn't be where I am now. So I don't regret it. I didn't know at the time I was hurting them.

    I only regret that I didn't get into shapeshifting earlier.

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    Reaper Away

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    #17
    04-28-2015, 05:39 PM
    [Image: i-regret-nothing_zpsueanwfoc.gif]
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      • BlatzAdict
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    #18
    04-30-2015, 06:15 AM
    I would say the attachment to the concept of past/future is what causes unnecessary suffering. Thinking about the past/future isn't wrong.

    I would also say that one of the central themes in the Ra material and as far as i am aware every esoteric tradition on earth is that the past/future or time is simply an illusion, although this as it maybe i think its healthy to keep a balanced view on reality being grounded in the moment with the understanding of the illusionary aspects of reality as well as being aware of the limitation of that thinking in 3rd density experience.

    An interesting point to note from my personal experience and thanks to a little wisdom of the great Alan Watts, is that you cannot think of the past/future outside of the present moment.
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      • YinYang
    BlatzAdict (Offline)

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    #19
    05-02-2015, 07:17 PM
    regret and thankfulness is a choice we make between fear and love. do i regret what has happened? no i look at them as stepping stones of lessons to instill and remind myself of the present moment. i am and do know to be thankful for those things rather than to look at them with regret, in that way I use transformation of the mind, in the tarot.

    In this way the path through the the original vibration is clearer even in the darkest of hours, since by then it is possible to rewrite the imprint those experiences by which the past informs the present moment.
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      • Minyatur
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