Helping someone when we don't want to

[AnthroHeart]

My mom asked me to cook dinner for us. I already have a footlong sub sandwich for me, so I didn't feel like doing that.

But I did anyway because she is disabled and feels dizzy and weak, so she can't cook.

I do it because deep down I love her, and she obviously needs my help. Plus I get paid to take care of her.

But I just don't feel like doing that. I did anyway.

Is that negatively polarizing? Positively polarizing? Neutral?

After I did the work, I realized it wasn't so hard.

[earth_spirit]

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[anagogy]

My mom asked me to cook dinner for us. I already have a footlong sub sandwich for me, so I didn't feel like doing that.

But I did anyway because she is disabled and feels dizzy and weak, so she can't cook.

I do it because deep down I love her, and she obviously needs my help. Plus I get paid to take care of her.

But I just don't feel like doing that. I did anyway.

Is that negatively polarizing? Positively polarizing? Neutral?

After I did the work, I realized it wasn't so hard.

If you do something out of habit, it is not polarizing. If you do something out of obligation, and you don't really want to do it, it is not polarizing. But if you do something out of duty or obligation, and you don't want to do it, but the ultimate reason you do it anyway is out of loving concern for another, then it *is* positively polarizing.

[BlatzAdict]

i think that's polarizing positive because the big voice always wants to be selfish and it's learning to listen to the smaller less loud voice.

though a further polarization would make me ask, why are you asking your mom to pay you to cook for her, she should be paying you in love and kisses, why are you taking your mom's money. I'm trying really hard not to put any negativity here though I think it is very self entitled... what makes you think she owes you anything to begin with. she owes you nothing, she gave you life. don't think anyone owes you anything.

[AnthroHeart]

She is not paying me. An agency is paying me to take care of my disabled mother.

[Jade]

I'm very glad to hear that, Gem, as that's what I figured/hoped was going on. I hope that situation becomes more and more the norm (as I think it is) - it's far cheaper to give a family member a stipend to take care of someone who is disabled as their 'job' than it is to pay to house someone full time in a facility. Is it common in the state of Texas?

[BlatzAdict]

sorry my bad for misunderstanding, i've never heard of an organization that paid people to take care of themselves and each other. new to me.

[Minyatur]

I'd say analyze how you feel about it. Then analyze how you feel about how you feel about it.

They are your feelings, so the analysis I can make from your words is limited. From what I see and including you creating this thread, you are polarising posetively.

[cloud]

I seek oppourtinities where I can help, especially if it is difficult and I don't want to do it, because afterwards I feel so much better about myself and know I've walked one step closer to completing my mission, fulfilling my purpose and replacing my regret with anew pride.

However, if I feel like I am aiding a bad or negative reason then I am cautious and try to remain nuetral in benefiting both the positive elements as well with negative if possible. If not, I let their own freewill ride it out.

Sounds like you did something positive you should feel proud of yourself for helping your mother