The unconditional love myth, as described by Donovan Sharpe

[AnthroHeart]

How so?

Google defines a paradox as "a seemingly absurd or self-contradictory statement or proposition that when investigated or explained may prove to be well founded or true."

You say that the kind of love people talk about is seemingly absurd. But when you really look into it, that kind of love can be found.

We might not have true unconditional love here in 3D, but we can have close. In fourth density, where Earth is heading, unconditional love is a foundation.

We don't see it here because it's all part of the mystery. It all begins and ends in mystery.

[Relax]

Yes, we get it Relaxo: you're a "woke" ass liberal who has no respect for dissenting viewpoints, but are you
REALLY going to deny the existence of a mating market?

"we"  like who - specifically? *lol*

"no respect for dissenting viewpoints" ? *lol*

"a mating market" *mentally vomits*

In summary:
*asks self why she wasted her time sharing her compassion and ideas*

*gets the answer (had good intentions towards someone sharing their pain) - but decides not bother in the future*

observes: EP is doing a good job of avoiding the observations I make about him.

General fyi: one of my attractions is to confident 'masculine' men - one of my turn offs is dominance-advocating, "pickup artist", entitled, whiny, grabby me-me-ME incels.

NB:

"left-wing vs right-wing narrative has to go. It's steered largely by a supremacist system. It's more accurate to refer to kindness versus sociopathy, personality disorder/s etc."

I'm not a "woke-ass liberal"

I'm ME

I thought you were 18-19 - just checked - your profile says you're 29
- but even still - I have nearly THIRTY years more learning than you.

you DON'T get to tell me who I am. SIMPLE.

I'm muting your posts now - you've repeatedly shown me that no matter how much compassion and effort I (and others) give to you - you're an ingrate who will spit back with nastiness (then pm apologetically). I've wasted too much time listening to your passive-aggressive whining and being silly enough to make effort to try to help - as it is.

what's that? I sound 'butthurt'? whatever - just responding to your energy.

ps: it was pathetic not thanking Glow (only thanking Flofrog) for kind words to you.

[rest of post deleted - waste of time]

[AnthroHeart]

Relax, it's definitely a balance of looking out for yourself and not stepping on other people's toes.

[Relax]

Relax, it's definitely a balance of looking out for yourself and not stepping on other people's toes.

for me - it's a balance of respecting myself - respecting others - and if others disrespect me they only get so many chances
It doesn't win you 'popularity' - but it's authentic, and I do give people a good chance for quite a while until I draw the line and say 'no more'
there are several members that have disrespected me - hated on me because I'm 'liberal' - yet here we are on a website all about "social justice" (aka: STO)
hilarious really - as being anti 'social justice' is directly contrary to the Ra material
also - I have my own definition of what I mean by it - but get assumed as being of certain supposed politics

the USA is a very strange country
travel often shocks Americans because they realise how loved/hated they/their country is

since 2016, the USA is an outright international embarrassment - but SO many don't realise this

nb: I'm not saying Australia is without cringe factor/flaws by any means

I'm leaving this thread now - tired of the negative greetings that float around this whole place

[RitaJC]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ehrZij42CU

He's right. Unconditional love is reserved only for family and pets. People don't love each other unconditionally. They just don't. I know this website is big on "green ray unconditional love energy" and all that crap, but let's be real: NOBODY BUT YOUR FAMILY AND PETS LOVES YOU UNCONDITIONALLY and vice versa.

If you want to be loved and respected, you have to take responsibility for earning it and keeping it, because both are ABSOLUTELY conditional.

I've been angry for quite some time, because I didn't want to take responsibility for not having properly earned the love and respect I've wanted. And this "unconditional love" BS only gives unrealistic expectations.

And conditional love brings out the best in men. Those of us wanting unconditional love are just not taking responsibility for ourselves. This man speaks the truth and his brutal honesty is opening my eyes. Men looking for unconditional love are weak, and I just allowed myself to be weak because I didn't want the responsibility of being strong. And that needs to change.

Basically, f*** unconditional love.

I am sorry to say but I hadn't heard anything this incompetent, impotent, and misogynistic for a long time (I mean the first 2 minutes of the linked video, didn't abuse my soul listening after: "females are utterly incapable of loving anybody unconditionally except their children and their pets")

[EvolvingPhoenix]

Ouch, Relaxo just hit me with some truth bombs. I'll admit to that.

And Glow, you deserved my thanks for your support and Relaxo's right about that.

"Responding to energy" Interesting. I'll have to work on that, as it does indeed make a difference.

Relaxo's right. I've relied on the compassionate support of this community for a good while and lately, I'm spitting back in it's face.

She may be done with me, but that's okay. Worse has happened, and I need to take responsibility for ALL of it.

"you've repeatedly shown me that no matter how much compassion and effort I (and others) give to you - you're an ingrate who will spit back with nastiness"

She's right. I should probably stop going on B4 for a while. Until I get my s*** together.

[Diana]

Unconditional love is a rather misnamed concept in my opinion, due to the human understanding of the word "love," and in that sense it is a human myth because human understanding is generally so limited.

Unconditional love must go hand-in-hand with personal responsibility and accountability. The big hill to get over concerning unconditional love is to get over equating it with, though making it bigger than, earthly love (romantic love, friendship love, familial love, etc.). Unconditional love is acceptance and detachment from attachment (taking self and what serves the self out of the equation—although detachment and acceptance DO serve the self).

It must all start with the self. That's why personal responsibility and accountability are key. Until you accept yourself—by becoming who you see yourself as, and not burying or avoiding personal responsibility and accountability—there is no way you will accept that others accept you for who you are. And when you do accept yourself, you won't NEED their "unconditional love." 

It does become a bit isolating when you get to this place (while here anyway). It's not all roses and unicorns. You look out at the world and accept it for what it is—you accept it and feel the suffering (and the joy). But it isn't that simple here (though it may seem to be for discarnate entities just looking on here) because personal responsibility and accountability also mean that you make decisions on when to "help" and when not to. As Ra says, when you come upon a starving entity, the proper response is to feed that entity. Nothing is simple, though many try to say it is. Life is a labyrinth of growing and balancing.

Imagine when you get something you wanted, such as a friend finally taking your advice after a passionate plea on your part. Have you ever felt a vague anticlimax, or niggling feeling then, even though you might also feel relief (because you have succeeded)? Imagine yourself letting go of your passionate desire for that friend to do what you think he or she should, stepping back, and standing with no attachment to the outcome, and now being able to just feel the love and caring you have for that person. Have you ever done that and felt your heart swell? I'm not saying we should do nothing; I'm saying that detachment from outcome is what makes love unconditional.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

There's some good truth to what you said, Diana. I'll be re-reading what you wrote to fully digest it, but you may have just given me a key out of this pattern I'm locked in.

"Until you accept yourself—by becoming who you see yourself as, and not burying or avoiding personal responsibility and accountability—there is no way you will accept that others accept you for who you are."

That one got to me because as Relaxo pointed out, I just spat in Glow's face after she did just that: accept me for who I am.

But what do you mean "Becoming who you see yourself as?" Do you mean becoming what I don't like about myself and learning to accept it? Or do you mean something else?

Thank you btw Diana, for your contribution.

[Diana]

But what do you mean "Becoming who you see yourself as?" Do you mean becoming what I don't like about myself and learning to accept it? Or do you mean something else?

I mean your ideal self as you imagine it—the person you would like to be or think you are at any given moment. Imagine the very best version of yourself, and that is what to strive for and stay true to. This ideal will change as you evolve. The idea is to be awake to it, and not look outside of self to "fix" self. Do you see yourself as kind, for example? Your actions, words, and thoughts ideally will match the vision of who you see yourself as.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

@Relaxo

Just caught this part: "I'll add in here - often people who wanted to partner with me - I didn't want to partner with; even though they were attractive and good people.
The person I was looking for may not be incarnate. I don't know."

And then you go onto mention you previously used to have lovers in your life. My guess is this was when you were young.

Donovan Sharpe and other red-pilled commentators cover this one rather extensively.

It seems as you got older, the people that still wanted to partner with you were "attractive" but not sexually arousing, so you noped away from them, despite the fact that they were "attractive and good people". I'm going to guess they were nice guys, but not sexually appealing ones. In other words: betas. They were not the people you would have taken on as "lovers" when you were younger. And nobody you would have taken on as a "lover" seems to want to partner up and commit with you, now that you've hit what is termed in the red pill community as "The Wall" Another term that probably elicits a *lol* or *mentally vomits* from you but nonetheless objectively describes a real life phenomenon that you are no exception to. "Maybe the person I was looking for may not be incarnate" No, they're incarnate, but they're looking for younger women. This is what I mean when I talk about a "mating market" Yet for some reason, the thought makes you "mentally vomit" even though I am seeing CLEAR SIGNS of a mating market playing out in your statements.

As for marrying yourself, this is making necessity a virtue, but I'm beginning to think there's still something to it. Hey, if it makes you happy, go for it.

"you DON'T get to tell me who I am. SIMPLE." Calling you a liberal isn't defining WHO you are, but objectively, WHAT you are. You are left wing, as is clearly evidenced in your posts. And have you not been telling me what you think I am in your posts? I don't see why you get to define me, but nobody gets to define you.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

But what do you mean "Becoming who you see yourself as?" Do you mean becoming what I don't like about myself and learning to accept it? Or do you mean something else?

I mean your ideal self as you imagine it—the person you would like to be or think you are at any given moment. Imagine the very best version of yourself, and that is what to strive for and stay true to. This ideal will change as you evolve. The idea is to be awake to it, and not look outside of self to "fix" self. Do you see yourself as kind, for example? Your actions, words, and thoughts ideally will match the vision of who you see yourself as.

That makes sense. I guess I'm trying to formulate the best ideal self to want to embody lately. I admit that a black magick practicing, negative, bitter man who spits in the face of people throwing love and support his way is not it.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

Also, I didn't know you could mute somebody's posts? You can do that? Huh. I'm gonna try that with the.

[Glow]

@Relaxo

Just caught this part: "I'll add in here - often people who wanted to partner with me - I didn't want to partner with; even though they were attractive and good people.
The person I was looking for may not be incarnate. I don't know."

And then you go onto mention you previously used to have lovers in your life. My guess is this was when you were young.

Donovan Sharpe and other red-pilled commentators cover this one rather extensively.

It seems as you got older, the people that still wanted to partner with you were "attractive" but not sexually arousing, so you noped away from them, despite the fact that they were "attractive and good people". I'm going to guess they were nice guys, but not sexually appealing ones. In other words: betas. They were not the people you would have taken on as "lovers" when you were younger. And nobody you would have taken on as a "lover" seems to want to partner up and commit with you, now that you've hit what is termed in the red pill community as "The Wall" Another term that probably elicits a *lol* or *mentally vomits* from you but nonetheless objectively describes a real life phenomenon that you are no exception to. "Maybe the person I was looking for may not be incarnate" No, they're incarnate, but they're looking for younger women. This is what I mean when I talk about a "mating market"  Yet for some reason, the thought makes you "mentally vomit" even though I am seeing CLEAR SIGNS of a mating market playing out in your statements.

As for marrying yourself, this is making necessity a virtue, but I'm beginning to think there's still something to it. Hey, if it makes you happy, go for it.

"you DON'T get to tell me who I am. SIMPLE." Calling you a liberal isn't defining WHO you are, but objectively, WHAT you are. You are left wing, as is clearly evidenced in your posts. And have you not been telling me what you think I am in your posts? I don't see why you get to define me, but nobody gets to define you.

EP slow down. You are really talking out of your a$$ right now making assumptions based on bad information about someone you do not know.

She hasn't hit a wall. She like myself would never be with a man who sought "younger women" do you know why?
It is because men who are led based on such criteria would not match me as a mate anyways as they are still functioning from lower consciousness levels. I would not relate to them harmoniously mentally/emotionally/spiritually so I would not want them physically. There would be no partnership in all levels which is what I seek.

Even my husband doesn't understand men like that. He calls them monkeys because they are behaving from lower ray like an animal. Once you lift up to higher awareness the lower rays come with you. Your sexuality becomes linked to deeper connection to another, simple things like the exterior of a person isn't enough there needs to be connection on all levels.

There also isn't a wall my own mother as an example. Married a wonderful man at 58 same age as she, he had a really wonderful heart, treated her well, a spiritual man, they had nearly a decade together happily. He died unfortunately and now 5 years later at 72 another friendship has blossomed into romance with a man who is again her own age. They are like teenagers. Really happy.

Women don't shrivel up and become unmarketable like redpill men like to believe. I am 42 and get hit on all the time. Like Relax says though I wouldn't date any of them. I have only met 2 men in my whole life I had interest in on that mate level because we match well in much deeper ways. Friends first.Still love them both by the way. The real stuff doesn't fade.

It is amazing to me you went from doing all sorts of meditations and working to nurture yourself and heal and some how you ended up watching redpill propaganda. That is quite a direction change. It will not lead you where you wish to go if that is happiness.

I know many men(rich clients) who have checked all the boxes money, looks, ability to relate to people, friendly even but they followed the old fashioned male prescribed checklist never really giving much thought to heart. Now they have all the stuff. Property, family, children, all the expensive toys they could want. Yes even younger superficial women who would take them as a mate to benefit from there wealth. Some even have the 30 year younger girlfriend using them for their money.

Are they happy? they tell me no. Actually they generally spew their broken soul at me, showing how hollow and empty their hearts are when I am trying to just be polite and work. They puff up their chests to others and act like its all good then they tell me the truth.

They are not happy they don't know why. They feel empty. It was not the answer but they have no way out now, can't change direction, people depend on them. Guess what they all want. Real love. You wont find it following the old redpill way. It doesn't go there.

More specifically 2 were talking with me in unison several weeks ago. I've never had 2 crsck so hard that they were willing to breakdown and talk to me with another male present but they both were like sad broken little boys. Both wealthy and retired at 50 and they were practically sobbing talking about romantic love. I gave it to them straight. If a woman wants you because of your money or looks or any other superficial thing. They don't want you. They want that superficial thing.

Really I don't know why men keep promoting this bs.
It reminded me of a movie coming to america. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coming_to_America Eddie Murphy was the lead. It came out in 1988 and the premise was clear where a rich prince pretends to be a poor son of goat herders so he could meet someone who loves him for him. Not his wealth.

How did that obvious truth not catch on. It's the real deal. If someone loves you for anything you could lose, it never was love. Hollow.
Waste.

[Glow]

But what do you mean "Becoming who you see yourself as?" Do you mean becoming what I don't like about myself and learning to accept it? Or do you mean something else?

I mean your ideal self as you imagine it—the person you would like to be or think you are at any given moment. Imagine the very best version of yourself, and that is what to strive for and stay true to. This ideal will change as you evolve. The idea is to be awake to it, and not look outside of self to "fix" self. Do you see yourself as kind, for example? Your actions, words, and thoughts ideally will match the vision of who you see yourself as.

That makes sense. I guess I'm trying to formulate the best ideal self to want to embody lately. I admit that a black magick practicing, negative, bitter man who spits in the face of people throwing love and support his way is not it.

There is some aspect of self love that means you have to love yourself and accept yourself even flawed.
If you cannot accept yourself unless perfect you will not accept others flaws either and that is part of the unconditional thing.

We are all a work in progress. None of us ever reach a state of completion. So you have to say. I can be a bit of an inflamed angry rude person when upset. I am working on it but I can still love me even though I am not perfect.

Do you want someone to still love you even though you are flawed? If so love yourself and them when flawed. Tomorrow we can always do better. But love is not dependent on some ideal version of self, it accepts/loves anyways but moves forward to grow and always learn/heal/do better.

I see you losing control, and buying into some unhelpful worldly ideals but I am impressed you can catch truth even when it feels bad, absorb it and try again. I accept you EP. I know it doesn't solve your problem but I am impressed you are trying. Life is hard.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

Thanks Glow. I appreciate that. There is some wisdom to what you say. Thanks for the encouragement.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

I know many men(rich clients) who have checked all the boxes money, looks, ability to relate to people, friendly even but they followed the old fashioned male prescribed checklist never really giving much thought to heart. Now they have all the stuff. Property, family, children, all the expensive toys they could want. Yes even younger superficial women who would take them as a mate to benefit from there wealth. Some even have the 30 year younger girlfriend using them for their money.

Are they happy? they tell me no. Actually they generally spew their broken soul at me, showing how hollow and empty their hearts are when I am trying to just be polite and work. They puff up their chests to others and act like its all good then they tell me the truth.

They are not happy they don't know why. They feel empty. It was not the answer but they have no way out now, can't change direction, people depend on them. Guess what they all want. Real love. You wont find it following the old redpill way. It doesn't go there.

More specifically 2 were talking with me in unison several weeks ago. I've never had 2 crsck so hard that they were willing to breakdown and talk to me with another male present but they both were like sad broken little boys. Both wealthy and retired at 50 and they were practically sobbing talking about romantic love. I gave it to them straight. If a woman wants you because of your money or looks or any other superficial thing. They don't want you. They want that superficial thing.

Where you make the mistake is in thinking that the Red pill material advocates getting gold diggers or women who want you for your looks. Most of these red pilled men are not the best looking and they are not rich, although they do take care of their bodies and try to be financially stable. What they advocate you use to attract very attractive women is MASCULINITY. They are highly masculine and dominant in their behaviour. THAT'S what attracts women to them.

And the Wall is real. It's where you stop being young and pretty and having so many options. Sure, you can have plenty of guys HITTING ON YOU after you hit the wall, but not so many men looking to commit after that point and most that do are generally lacking in the masculinity department. These men are generally not sexually arousing to their female partners when they get in these relationships, but they're stable and "good husband material". In other words, willing to pay the bills and handle all the woman's non-sexual needs. Cheating is not uncommon, and as one can observe statistically, divorce rates are high. This is summed up in the red pill saying: Alpha fucks, beta bucks.

You yourself said I'm willing to absorb uncomfortable truths. Well these men tell uncomfortable truths. I'm willing to take uncomfortable truths from people like Relaxo and you, people like Agua, AND people like these red pilled gurus.

[Glow]

I kind of feel soiled after hearing people say things like what you said there. It’s literally degrading.
Thankfully not part of my reality, a redpill belief but not part of my personal experience except in those parts of society that function like that. You don’t get it men we would want aren’t among those anyways.

You also missed the point I have life experiences that prove there is no wall.

I could list you dozens of people off the top of my head that got together with mates later in life of the same age and no sorry they are not of lower sexual/masculinity. I had a client pass on in his 70s the stories told by everyone was about him and his wife that got together 4 years earlier(same age). Always couldn’t answer the door or phone right away when friends called or came by because the couple couldn’t keep their hands off each other. He said something to the effect of waiting his whole life to find her. They had a few beautiful years. You have stories from angry bitter men propping up a false way of manipulating women around them.

I’ve seen/known and heard of couples who prove the redpill to be false.
Anyways I’m not here to debate anything. Was trying to help.
I’ve aided all I can.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

Fine. I'll take your point into consideration, Glow.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

I think what I've gleaned most importantly from Glow's post is that reality, being infinite and with thus infinite possibilities, is malleable. So when a motherfucker kicks reality, it's always just THEY'RE reality they're kicking. This is actually encouraging for me to read. Still, the malleability of reality is dependent on complex factors, factors which need to be understood to be worked with consciously.

[EvolvingPhoenix]

So I just got a response back from Agua today and...

Well he dropped some harsh truth bombs, about my behaviour, about my attitude towards women, about my biographical issues, about my relationship with others and with MYSELF, and the limiting beliefs behind red-pilled thinking. If I had his permission, I'd actually post what he emailed me, so others with the same issues I have can read his truth bombs.

But I had to swallow some really hard to swallow truth pills about this thread, and he's apparently STILL not done serving 'em up. So to all the people disgusted by my red pilled postings, you can thank Agua for setting me straight.

Anyway, just wanted to leave that little update.