Revelations about my state of being.

[Adonai One]

For most of my life I have not fully felt as a soul should. My emotions are veiled so strongly that everything I do in life must be done through sheer force of will...

This came to me after Vervex started connecting to me and all she could feel was agonizing weariness and emotional numbness. It could be said by most standards I feel nothing. I have been living a horribly crippled life and I am so used to it that I can barely see it.

I am now reaching a turning point in my life to where I can begin to heal but the journey is of much hardship. I could never succeed in school and my other endeavours because of this... I could never do anything out of a frictionless love... I had to will myself to do it... I don't fully understand how these wounds came to be, if they are preincarnative or what... But I know I will. I have that much faith.

I welcome any insight into this.

Much love.

[Aureus]

Sounds like a red jasper would be helpful. Find one weighing around 60-120g containing this color
: http://www.decorativefilm.com/images/thu...00220..jpg

It is the color of self-love, and will overtone into universal love. Give it a try, if you find the right color.. I have no doubt you'll find it to be of aid.

[GentleReckoning]

I'm healing from the same thing. I had a relationship when I was much younger where I started the healing process, but the other member ended it prematurely.

It's a lot of work to do on your own, so be thankful that you are in a relationship.

Basically, the longer you put it off, the faster you sabotage every single thing you try and do.

[Sagittarius]

For most of my life I have not fully felt as a soul should. My emotions are veiled so strongly that everything I do in life must be done through sheer force of will...

This came to me after Vervex started connecting to me and all she could feel was agonizing weariness and emotional numbness. It could be said by most standards I feel nothing. I have been living a horribly crippled life and I am so used to it that I can barely see it.

I am now reaching a turning point in my life to where I can begin to heal but the journey is of much hardship. I could never succeed in school and my other endeavours because of this... I could never do anything out of a frictionless love... I had to will myself to do it... I don't fully understand how these wounds came to be, if they are preincarnative or what... But I know I will. I have that much faith.

I welcome any insight into this.

Much love.

Have fun bro once the healing starts you will find your true motivation. The wounds are not really pre-incarnate I prefer to look at them as the scars of humanity up until this point. Everyone shares them and everyone shares in the healing of them.

Once it begins you can't stop it hehe.

[Parsons]

I have had a remarkably similar experience thus far.

Emotionally, I can only experience an emotion if I choose to. I very rarely experience spontaneous emotions. I have only recently begun to see this as dysfunctional and attempted to heal it. It is sometimes useful, however, as sometimes very harsh catalyst can be overwhelming.

I also believe this can be healed. I'm not entirely sure, but I think most of the damage done was in this incarnation, not preincarnatively. I had quite a lot of difficulty in my first 25 years of this life.

[Sagittarius]

I have had a remarkably similar experience thus far.

Emotionally, I can only experience an emotion if I choose to. I very rarely experience spontaneous emotions. I have only recently begun to see this as dysfunctional and attempted to heal it. It is sometimes useful, however, as sometimes very harsh catalyst can be overwhelming.

I also believe this can be healed. I'm not entirely sure, but I think most of the damage done was in this incarnation, not preincarnatively. I had quite a lot of difficulty in my first 25 years of this life.

Your efforts along with everyone older then us have helped kids like me and adonai, thanks brother you make the path clearer.

[zenmaster]

How should a soul feel? Cupcakes and rainbows?

[Sagittarius]

How should a soul feel? Cupcakes and rainbows?

I prefer puppies and unicorns tbh.

[Parsons]

How should a soul feel? Cupcakes and rainbows?

If you so desire. :d

[BrownEye]

Front side of the chakra system has to do with 'feeling'. If you are able to channel you are also able to request repairs be made to your system. It is not always a matter of raising an old issue and changing perspective.

[Fastidious Emanations]

One can take it all in?

[Sagittarius]

One can take it all in?

One needs to take it all in. So spread those cheeks baby.

[Aloysius]

Sounds like a red jasper would be helpful. Find one weighing around 60-120g containing this color
: http://www.decorativefilm.com/images/thu...00220..jpg

It is the color of self-love, and will overtone into universal love. Give it a try, if you find the right color.. I have no doubt you'll find it to be of aid.

Buying a crystal won't solve your problems.

It's very easy to imagine terrible past lives that must be responsible for our current issues...

You'll be fine man, just lay off the negative nancy attitude a bit lol Edit: And by that I mean don't be too hard on yourself hey.

[ChickenInSpace]

For most of my life I have not fully felt as a soul should. My emotions are veiled so strongly that everything I do in life must be done through sheer force of will...

This came to me after Vervex started connecting to me and all she could feel was agonizing weariness and emotional numbness. It could be said by most standards I feel nothing. I have been living a horribly crippled life and I am so used to it that I can barely see it.

I am now reaching a turning point in my life to where I can begin to heal but the journey is of much hardship. I could never succeed in school and my other endeavours because of this... I could never do anything out of a frictionless love... I had to will myself to do it... I don't fully understand how these wounds came to be, if they are preincarnative or what... But I know I will. I have that much faith.

I welcome any insight into this.

Much love.

Do you feel you always should or need to be in control?
Has any emotion ever surprised you by its appearance in your being?
Why would you consider your emotions veiled?

[Aureus]

Sounds like a red jasper would be helpful. Find one weighing around 60-120g containing this color
: http://www.decorativefilm.com/images/thu...00220..jpg

It is the color of self-love, and will overtone into universal love. Give it a try, if you find the right color.. I have no doubt you'll find it to be of aid.

Buying a crystal won't solve your problems.

It's very easy to imagine terrible past lives that must be responsible for our current issues...

You'll be fine man, just lay off the negative nancy attitude a bit lol Edit: And by that I mean don't be too hard on yourself hey.

I said it would be helpful, speaking from personal experience. The "lay off the negative nancy attitude a bit"-method however seems solid...

[Hototo]

Just all this talk of self analysis reminds me of this... Episode...

[Jeremy]

Just all this talk of self analysis reminds me of this... Episode...

Are you a bronie?

[Hototo]

/) (/

Upsidedown brohoof man.

[Adonai One]

For most of my life I have not fully felt as a soul should. My emotions are veiled so strongly that everything I do in life must be done through sheer force of will...

This came to me after Vervex started connecting to me and all she could feel was agonizing weariness and emotional numbness. It could be said by most standards I feel nothing. I have been living a horribly crippled life and I am so used to it that I can barely see it.

I am now reaching a turning point in my life to where I can begin to heal but the journey is of much hardship. I could never succeed in school and my other endeavours because of this... I could never do anything out of a frictionless love... I had to will myself to do it... I don't fully understand how these wounds came to be, if they are preincarnative or what... But I know I will. I have that much faith.

I welcome any insight into this.

Much love.

Do you feel you always should or need to be in control?
Has any emotion ever surprised you by its appearance in your being?
Why would you consider your emotions veiled?

Such was my attitude as a young child. It seems my traumas were caused by school.

[michael430]

Just throwing it out there for you friend - personify the Creator (God) in your mind...thank him and love him and ask for his advice. Forget for a moment the whole "YOU are the Creator" thing ... that can come back later. I know it's not your bag based on older posts, but why not give it a shot and see how you feel?

[AnthroHeart]

I've given Creator many gifts out of my own free will, expecting nothing in return. That was my thanks to Creator for being.

[Marc]

I also have difficulty with my emotional aspect of myself due possibly to early trauma.

I've been recently getting in touch with my dreams where I've been able to meet and work with my anima (see Jung's work on it). It's been a transformative journey and I've only just begun in finding my emotional side buried in the unconscious.

My friend, you've embarked on a wonderful journey and enjoy each part without judgment against yourself. Remember: know thyself, accept thyself, and become the creator.

[AnthroHeart]

I've been emotionally hypersensitive. Both fearful, and extreme adorability feeling when I saw cute cartoon characters animated on a wall. I've learned to know myself, and have experienced being co-creator.