please help

[Light]

Hello Light. That is the exact experience I had while trying LSD - which imprinted me with this negative fractal idea. Truly, the worst experience of my life, and complete hopelessness is the final point where nothing can get worse. I have not been afraid of anything except this hopelessness ever since. If I can see the love in this hopelessness, then maybe, I'll never know fear again. The idea of knowing the ultimate fear is a great potential power in itself... a great opportunity for learning indeed.
The worst 3D can produce, as you say. The worst that has ever been created. To become comfortable with the ultimate fear is perhaps a main goal of this incarnation.

How did you go about and abolish the negativity from the fractal? I don't know what to do with it except accept it as the most terrible thing possible, something I have absolutely no use of, and not feed it any power beyond that.

I think you were right on with "To become comfortable with the ultimate fear is perhaps a main goal of this incarnation."

Also your right, you need to accept it, but you must accept it as yourself. You survived, all is well, so what purpose does fear serve? It serves to protect the ego. Your ego is what needs to be abolished, not the infinite fractal (because that is you). Once your ego is gone the fear is too.

Have you tried LSD since then? I see the horrible experience I had as a test. The test was- would I run and not try it again or would I face the only fear I had left? I chose to face it and I was greatly rewarded. My next trip(4 hits/17 hour trip) a month after was the exact opposite of the first(like I followed the fractal the other way). At the peak I experienced infinity in the other direction, I literally became light (not a metaphor) and there was no time(for all was experienced at once). That was the point of no return, as in no more doubt and no more fear. I also was made aware of the shift occurring and that the year would be around 2012, this surprised me because before I thought that stuff was just dooms day nonsense. Anyway, since then, I had a few more trips and studied, meditated etc a lot. My ego is pretty much gone, literally the only emotion I experience now is a feeling of love(peace, joy etc) and of course physical pain. My emotions left with the ego, because like ego, they are just distortions of light and love... So the most important thing is to not give up!