03-24-2013, 01:52 PM
You mention in your wanderer story you were elated when you found the Law of One. (You said you would be a miserable skeptic without it.) But you have since made doubting questions here, and you mention pressure in the indigo center. So I believe you may have reverted to doubting higher realities and the material, and therefore are depressed/bored. If you need "proof" of it you could attempt the magical path of creating your reality, that is also indigo center and means visualization type meditation combined with desire/emotion.