The Creator

[Adonai One]

I can imagine when the creator rose from the primordial soup that is intelligent infinity, he found himself lost and confused just as we are when we discover ourselves; I can imagine he only saw a blank canvas before him with no inherent meaning or purpose but himself; I can imagine he suffered for eons in nihilism before he created the reality we know today.

Is this just my imagination?

Did our creator indeed stumble in his developmental stages? Did he really have no past prior to his self-awareness?

Edit: Suffer isn't the correct word. It is too humanzing. However, I guess I mean to ask is if the creator truly took baby steps toward true intelligence and power?