10-30-2013, 03:03 PM
I haven't opened up with everything. But most things I've been trusting of my therapist. He agrees the drugs are good for me to keep me sane. I don't have the will or faith to handle the episodes by myself. I just like talking with him, so I get a little bit honest. There isn't really anything I wished I hadn't told him, and I think he appreciates my honesty with him.
It's just bad that in my upcoming court case my lawyer won't be using my therapist. I thought he would make a good witness of how I've changed since I went from not knowing right from wrong to being level headed.
I'm not really seeking spiritually, so if the meds slow my spiritual growth, I don't really have a problem with that. I still seem to have a somewhat active indigo ray. And my green ray seems to be about average. Sometimes I feel it, sometimes not.
I've been on my medication for the last 10 months. They do numb me out a bit, so I don't really feel joy anymore. But I also don't experience terror. There is a lot better place I wish I could be. It would be nice to be without the meds. But after 3 times trying to stop, and 3 times having episodes, I can't chance going without them.
It's just bad that in my upcoming court case my lawyer won't be using my therapist. I thought he would make a good witness of how I've changed since I went from not knowing right from wrong to being level headed.
I'm not really seeking spiritually, so if the meds slow my spiritual growth, I don't really have a problem with that. I still seem to have a somewhat active indigo ray. And my green ray seems to be about average. Sometimes I feel it, sometimes not.
I've been on my medication for the last 10 months. They do numb me out a bit, so I don't really feel joy anymore. But I also don't experience terror. There is a lot better place I wish I could be. It would be nice to be without the meds. But after 3 times trying to stop, and 3 times having episodes, I can't chance going without them.