Losing faith

[Adonai One]

A year or two ago I believed there was no meaning; Faith was absurd. I stagnated emotionally. I soon realized that if nothing was meaningful then everything was. Gradually I realized the self was simply a series of desires and beliefs and that most of these were deliberately hidden from myself, desires I considered childish, impractical. I then said every desire I had was of infinite worth. I am now happy, I now praise my existence, I now praise everything.

I am not in a utopia, I experience suffering. The difference is that I am grateful for every suffering and every pleasure, for every bit of existence is meaningful to me. I embrace it all, even what I cannot embrace.

If I were to give my philosophy a name, this would be it: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trivialism

Hedonism is woefully incomplete: It does not see pleasure in everything.