Why I am not a vegan

[Diana]

Maybe that is my issue with the whole meat thing is I can clearly see the whole suffering issue, but I don't really have a guilt-complex over it.

I envy anyone who does not buy into guilt. I am not so evolved or fortunate.

There is the concept of a life review. My friend, Kelly Larsen, who wrote "Keys to Your Inner Power" tells the story of how she got interested in spiritual seeking. She was an RN in the ICU. A man she calls Mr. Williams was recovering from heart surgery and went into cardiac arrest. They got the crash cart and started dealing with his heart failure. Kelly sat by him and held his hand, looking into his eyes to calm him. She was somehow sucked into a white tunnel with Mr. W and ended up in a room where a light being met them (the light being and Mr. W briefly looked at Kelly wondering what she was doing there, but let it go).

The walls were showing scenes of Mr. W's life in phastasmagorical style. Everything he had done, with absolutely no judgment. When the visions ended, the light being asked Mr. W his reaction. Mr. W felt he needed to do some healing with his son, so he and Kelly went back into their bodies in the hospital room.

I know Kelly very well, so this is one instance where I don't have to question the veracity or perceptions of the author. There is no judgment, that much is clear. So why feel guilt?

I often think about what my reaction will be when I leave this place. My thought is always this: Did I accomplish what I came here to do. This thought keeps me here and trying to do my best with what I am capable of doing. I am creative and have great visualizing skills. It is my theory that the artists of this world are here to help visualize for those that can't.

In the context of Kelly's story, I feel, though there was no judgment, that I will judge myself and my actions against what I came here to do. I don't see myself as just "being" and doing nothing. I know a channel whose channeled being keeps saying that—just be—but I am apparently not evolved enough for that. I have a deep urge to accomplish some goal here.

As regards animals and their suffering—I cannot participate in any suffering knowingly when it is not necessary. This is a central point for me in consuming animals, especially in the U.S. where factory farming has reached horrible heights of torture and greed.

So I'm not saying it is important to make it all stop (though I wish I could) as I know I can't do that. But it is important to me to do my best to live in the highest, conscious way I can, day by day, choice by choice.

In the end, everything may be equal and without particular significance. But though we might look at the bigger picture, this 3D Earth is still a portion of reality, and one we are in NOW. I don't feel I'm here just to flow with the current being made by others or the "whole." I feel I want to contribute to that current of evolution and experience, helping to guide it into a positive stream of being.