I feel consciousness getting lighter

[Lighthead]

Yeah, been cutting down on the meditation and focussing on metta to get more balance. The deja vu feeling is odd, it's not about anything specific but a feeling like my entire life has happened before. Like I'm on the verge of remembering past lives, or something.

You're probably getting closer to the reality (or awareness) that the universe is infinite. That's probably why you feel like your life has happened before. Just my thoughts. On an infinite time loop, everything has already happened before.

Yes, that's exactly what it feels like! It's kind of overwhelming though, especially as the room in front of my eyes starts to shimmer and drift like I've just had a dose of LSD or something, haha. It feels slightly sinister, but I don't know if that's a real feeling or just my ego kicking in to try to stop me pushing further.

You are so tripping me out when you say that it feels slightly sinister. Almost all of my truly mystical experiences have a sinister feel to them. I wonder if most people who've had them would acknowledge that that could be a basic component of one. I tend to feel, at once, infinitely good and yet infinitely evil. I think that it could be the fact that in a mystical experience, both polarities are trying to merge to express their unity. That's what I think it could be.