05-27-2015, 10:25 AM
(This post was last modified: 05-27-2015, 10:37 AM by VanAlioSaldo.)
And please don't attribute disharmony to Service to Self individuals. Free Will itself allows for indifference and ignorance of itself.
This is the way it is overall by the design and creation from the whole. By that perspective alone. I have a huge issue with the entire design.
If the Creator wishes to ruin itself, I don't want any part in it. I literally feel at depths, disgust for this entire creation now.
You want to call this Unconditional Love? Do as you please. But I think I need to leave. My idea of what is, clearly does not resonate with this set up at all.
That I find myself here, and feel like I've been forced here, in this exact same reincarnation, at least several times more than ONCE, clearly with suicide from a prior life as the issue.
Why in the flying absence of creation, would it be considered unconditional love, to force me here, again, and again, and again...? Or be consonant with the First Distortion, if I, the Human, want to willingly, having thought it over very much so since I was. I don't know. 5? That I might not want to let this life play all the way through simply because along the way, I realized that it is not what I want at all?
How's that work out for me? Do we just call me suicidal and try to force me to continue living? Do I need to explain in depth how I didn't just arrive at the lack of all desire for anything by my own choices, but got sick of seeing a 'unconditionally loving universe' act closer to indifferent and uncaring towards Life in 3D in general...
Wouldn't part of the whole be those who absolutely stopped and said, enough?
Where does one stop and say enough? Can they? Am I just forced to be here then, and when I give up, will I find myself absently wandering the Yellow Depression Place I've read so much in NDE's regarding suicide and sad souls?
What is wrong with this? This isn't free will, or loving... Higher Perspectives may disagree.
I think my Free Will alone should have the right to say their disagreement and term 'excuses', is an excuse for torture of sentient beings. If they want to be tortured, let them. But everyone else. If it isn't actually consensual, how dare anyone go about telling everyone else it is and saying to them 'you wanted this' 'you choose this' 'you're responsible for this'.
At what point can I, as a portion of the Creation, stop, look, and scream in absolute vehement horror and absolute terror that I. Somehow. Would ever want this? That I'm told I would.
That I as a Human Being, disagree, and if I'm the soul self as the human disagreeing. The Free Will of the Soul is ultimately also ignored. Life Contracts for reincarnation on a planet without memory...?
Sounds like the Creator enjoys torture. It's not what I want, why can't I go somewhere else without basically being screwed overall?
Whats with this set up?
I do not agree with it. If I don't resonate with it, and I drop it. What happens then?
Life goes on? And the continued horror continues endlessly as it will...? For all of 3D...?
EDIT: And I'm sorry for my nihilism, I was nihilistic before I picked up the Law of One, being of the premise, All I know Truly Is I Know Nothing... I am so truly saddened and it is truly hurtful that the one thing I found to be..True and Real I have found some very disturbing issues in its outlook... If what I'm saying just doesn't make sense to you. Then I congratulate you. I wish I could understand it as a justifiable okay thing. But me, personally, I can't. So I don't know where that leaves me or what I'll do. I honestly don't want to commit suicide for any reason. I just find there are times where I not only looked around and felt something was wrong with Society, then Humanity, then the World. But now, Existence...I'm sorry guys. I sometimes wonder if I should just disappear into the wilderness and finish out life completely gone and away from everything but myself and nature...I have a horrific habit of finding inherent issues in everything that I come to love and care about. I used to think it was helpful when I used it to love people more. Now I see it has one issue. With faith I still can't reconcile indifference with love. Love does not fix indifference or change indifference... If anything, it also seems like Indifference holds more power in the long run.
I don't understand. Even though this is not the Density for Understanding, is that supposed to explain, reconcile, or make up for the unexplained terror that is dished out on 3D beings? Does love really allow for the justification?
This is the way it is overall by the design and creation from the whole. By that perspective alone. I have a huge issue with the entire design.
If the Creator wishes to ruin itself, I don't want any part in it. I literally feel at depths, disgust for this entire creation now.
You want to call this Unconditional Love? Do as you please. But I think I need to leave. My idea of what is, clearly does not resonate with this set up at all.
That I find myself here, and feel like I've been forced here, in this exact same reincarnation, at least several times more than ONCE, clearly with suicide from a prior life as the issue.
Why in the flying absence of creation, would it be considered unconditional love, to force me here, again, and again, and again...? Or be consonant with the First Distortion, if I, the Human, want to willingly, having thought it over very much so since I was. I don't know. 5? That I might not want to let this life play all the way through simply because along the way, I realized that it is not what I want at all?
How's that work out for me? Do we just call me suicidal and try to force me to continue living? Do I need to explain in depth how I didn't just arrive at the lack of all desire for anything by my own choices, but got sick of seeing a 'unconditionally loving universe' act closer to indifferent and uncaring towards Life in 3D in general...
Wouldn't part of the whole be those who absolutely stopped and said, enough?
Where does one stop and say enough? Can they? Am I just forced to be here then, and when I give up, will I find myself absently wandering the Yellow Depression Place I've read so much in NDE's regarding suicide and sad souls?
What is wrong with this? This isn't free will, or loving... Higher Perspectives may disagree.
I think my Free Will alone should have the right to say their disagreement and term 'excuses', is an excuse for torture of sentient beings. If they want to be tortured, let them. But everyone else. If it isn't actually consensual, how dare anyone go about telling everyone else it is and saying to them 'you wanted this' 'you choose this' 'you're responsible for this'.
At what point can I, as a portion of the Creation, stop, look, and scream in absolute vehement horror and absolute terror that I. Somehow. Would ever want this? That I'm told I would.
That I as a Human Being, disagree, and if I'm the soul self as the human disagreeing. The Free Will of the Soul is ultimately also ignored. Life Contracts for reincarnation on a planet without memory...?
Sounds like the Creator enjoys torture. It's not what I want, why can't I go somewhere else without basically being screwed overall?
Whats with this set up?
I do not agree with it. If I don't resonate with it, and I drop it. What happens then?
Life goes on? And the continued horror continues endlessly as it will...? For all of 3D...?
EDIT: And I'm sorry for my nihilism, I was nihilistic before I picked up the Law of One, being of the premise, All I know Truly Is I Know Nothing... I am so truly saddened and it is truly hurtful that the one thing I found to be..True and Real I have found some very disturbing issues in its outlook... If what I'm saying just doesn't make sense to you. Then I congratulate you. I wish I could understand it as a justifiable okay thing. But me, personally, I can't. So I don't know where that leaves me or what I'll do. I honestly don't want to commit suicide for any reason. I just find there are times where I not only looked around and felt something was wrong with Society, then Humanity, then the World. But now, Existence...I'm sorry guys. I sometimes wonder if I should just disappear into the wilderness and finish out life completely gone and away from everything but myself and nature...I have a horrific habit of finding inherent issues in everything that I come to love and care about. I used to think it was helpful when I used it to love people more. Now I see it has one issue. With faith I still can't reconcile indifference with love. Love does not fix indifference or change indifference... If anything, it also seems like Indifference holds more power in the long run.
I don't understand. Even though this is not the Density for Understanding, is that supposed to explain, reconcile, or make up for the unexplained terror that is dished out on 3D beings? Does love really allow for the justification?