art censorship????????

[Splash]

Her reasons for her experience is as valid as others' experience of this forum, and vice-a-versa.

That may be, but there are still standards of polite discussion that folks should try to maintain.  Her feeling of being threatened may have been valid, but does that really give her cause to call Raz an ignorant troll and then imply the board is full of haters who are attacking her?    I mean, that's kinda escalating the situation, don't you think?

She also hasn't acknowledged anyone's attempts to say "We weren't attacking you" or otherwise explain themselves.  She didn't even seem to notice that Raz voluntarily took down the video after she complained.  

There were better ways she could have handled it, basically.  Especially the "ignorant" part.  If ya think someone is uneducated on a topic, find some sources for them to look at.  Even just a Wiki article.   No one ever changed their mind because of name-calling, and much of the time, it just causes them to disregard what a person is saying.  That's a very practical bit of teach/learning that people can take away from this little brouhaha.

But I'm worried that if she's decided we're all attacking her, then she'll end up seeing any attempt to point this out as a further attack.  

I did not call Raz an "ignorant troll"

after carefully and open-heartedly discussing my viewpoints which basically are in support of current forum rules (as Austin has clarified for us)... and after expressing concern as a woman who lives on a planet where women have been trying to establish their equal rights for millennia:

ie: (girls and women experience the overwhelming percentage of rape, domestic violence, (until recently) weren't allowed to vote, still can't drive a car in some countries, in some countries women still have their clitoris cut off, women still have to combat institutionalised patriarchy trying to hold us back from equal rights, women are still continually being sexually objectified ... sexually exploited... etc)
http://www.un.org/en/globalissues/briefi...s/endviol/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rape_statistics

a member posts a video of dozens of almost naked young girls and women, dancing with sexualised movements in front of and around fully clothed men who are using the sexual objectification of their near naked bodies - to promote their (all male) band, their song, their video, and their careers.


so to me - that was so clear an "in your face" act of insensitivity (at best) - trolling at worst, I was sufficiently affronted to call it the later.

re "ignorance"  - I felt Raz's lack of knowledge, lack of understanding of the history of the equal rights (aka: feminist) struggle...

was/is - "ignorance"

NB: - "Ignorance"= "incomprehension of, unawareness of, unconsciousness of, unfamiliarity with, inexperience with, lack of knowledge about, lack of information about"  

I found that level of "ignorance" shown by posting such a sexist, exploitative video, on a thread where there were attempts to discuss what is and isn't appropriate for B4, astonishingly insensitive and inappropriate - let alone, that to post it was in breach of already stated forum rules!... (though it isn't the first time I've encountered insensitivity and oblivious male privilege on B4 though)... but the insensitivity of the timing was really provocative imo...

(I don't personally know any men who still think sexism is okay - or normal...)

and btw: this isn't a situation of me being prudish... not at all... (for eg) - if everyone was naked in that video I wouldn't have replied.

(I've done life drawing classes with male and female nude models, I love the human form- I don't have an issue with sex or nudity..

it's the CONTEXT that's the issue for me.)


To clarify other replies here:

- I didn't imply this whole site is full of haters...

- Of course I noticed Raz had taken the video down...

- "Better ways she could have handled it"
?what?
what happened to the responsibility for Raz not to BREAK THE FORUM RULES By POSTING THAT VIDEO?

fyi for mods: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dcYlytyuKsc

- I don't feel "threatened" here... I feel tired, I don't want to try to engage anymore.

- I don't feel "attacked" I never used that word... and it's not what I feel. When I come here I feel stressed, amazed at (some) peoples ideas and attitudes..

and btw: the "hate" isn't imaginary, or in my mind, or being created by me - several other past and current members have pm'd me telling me they experience it from (some) people here too -  

- and I have experienced direct bullying by 2 members (both now on moderated status because they were clearly SO hateful and aggressive towards me), and have also experienced a number of situations over the last 7 months where several people have combined on a thread to back each other up in unkindly worded criticism of me and/or agreed with each others passive-aggressive snide or bullying comments to me.

So there's NOTHING illusory or made up... or "self created" about that... what that attitude is - is "victim blaming".. it's alarmingly similar to telling a person she shouldn't have worn what ever she wore and went wherever she went - and that her assault (or rape) (or death) was her fault... if she'd done differently (hidden herself) (read: not had an opinion) - she could have avoided it... but instead - "she brought it on herself"

well - F***K THAT  

NB: There are members who have "liked" posts by a currently suspended member where that person is very negative towards me, so in that regard I am aware I speak and interact here, amongst some people who strongly dislike me.

Does this make me sad? Nope... does this hurt me? nope... does this stress me and tire me and help me realise interacting here (for me) is mostly pointless and negative?
YEP

so - the metaphysical theories being suggested that I'm bringing 'this' towards me, that I'm creating this - (several members suggest it's my attitude that's 'creating' what I encounter here...)

sure that's "a thing".. that can happen... but in this instance it's a metaphysical theory used to argue for avoiding responsibility for peoples own negative actions...

imo the negativity is already here (and B4 is gets this feedback about negativity/passive-aggressive energy here from other members who try to find a voice here, eventually have had enough of the disrespect - and close their accounts)

Basic manners and personal responsibility for behaviour is often missing on B4... but most people here are very lovely
and those I find negative are lovely people also... it's that (to me) their communication styles or attitudes, or inability to see beyond their world-view is hard to interact with.

New members are catalyst for current members - showing you here things about YOUR selves

We're not coming here and "creating" this... we're coming here and refusing to kowtow to the main Egregore here.

Yes, I get to see and learn things about me - I'm not perfect and have lots to take on board also... but I'm not 'creating negativity' here...

I'm exposing it.

I'm standing up to it.


NB: Being "hated" (very much disliked) by a few members here - doesn't upset me... but it does tire me

I love me... and I'm very loved by other people in my life...
I also know there are people on B4 that like me a lot
so I'm NOT saying I'm "hated/threatened or attacked" by most people here on bring 4th...

Because I'm not

I'm a deeply content, happy person away from this site... I don't have some 'poor sad me' thing going on...

Life's too short.. I've survived death several times... B4 doesn't "attack" or "threaten" me... but it does stress me..

as I said.. it doesn't seem to matter how thoughtfully I write.. how much time and care I take to explain myself clearly... people here react with their perception/state of reality - to my words... and see - in my caring assertiveness... whatever I trigger in them...

to me - people project their stuff onto/into my words...

I've been trying for months now... it's too tiring, I have other work to do....

so I'm leaving...

Like some others who leave, I'm a mismatch for B4...

I just want to give this feedback and then I'm leaving...

there are lovely people here... BEAUTIFUL people!!

I even love those who don't much like me...

but I gotta get outta here...

best wishes to all

^j^