Humanity is driving me insane...help!!

[Monica]

** This is something I REALLY struggle with. For instance, my mom has no problem telling me about scriptures, a book, a talk, or a miracle she's heard about. And she has no problem "bearing her testimony" to me. But when I've tried to share things with her, I literally had her hand in my face and she said, "Stop...I don't want to hear it." It seems that way with all my religious friends, too. They can praise Jesus or whatever, but I can't be who I really am.

Wow, I totally relate! I've experienced this too.

They are afraid. Terrified, actually! They think that if you share your spiritual experience, and it doesn't involve Biblical terminology, or you don't "give the glory to Jesus" then it's "of the devil" ie "satanic."

My brother once told me a story about a man who got healed from some traveling healer, told his church elders about it, and they prayed over him and put him back the way he was - with his illness - because the healer was actually fake, and 'of the devil.'

The sad thing was my brother actually believes that stuff! When I asked him how love, happiness, healing, peace etc. could be from 'the devil' he gravely told me about how clever 'satan' is.

They are really terrified of being deceived, because they've been taught that New Age teachings and experiences are satanic facsimiles of the 'real thing.'

They mean well, but they are just so locked up in their fears that they truly do think that the sharing of your experiences is exposing them to something evil and dangerous.

I know, to us it's ridiculous, but to them, it's quite serious!

I wish I had an easy answer for you, but I don't. I mostly just try to radiate love and joy, and hope it rubs off on them. And, I do confess to being somewhat of an instigator at times. For example, I usually try to avoid getting into it with them, but if they insist, then I go ahead and tell them the truth: "I have a very strong personal faith in God. And I have utmost reverence for Jesus, who was one of the great masters, along with Buddha, Krishna, and others. But I cannot accept the Bible as 'the infallible word of God' because I don't believe God would have been so cruel as to command genocide.Nor do I believe God has a 'chosen' people or plays favorites. Would you have a favorite among your children? Would you punish your children forever just because they tried to connect with you in a different way? If you couldn't be that cruel, then how could God?"

This really does a number on their head. Essentially, what I'm saying is that I refuse to lower my standards, and I'd have to lower my standards to accept the old testament and many of the beliefs of Christianity. They fancy themselves as having the highest standards, so when someone tells them that Christianity is not up to their standards of peace/love/forgiveness, well, it sends them reeling, and they can't help but start thinking outside the box!

However, I am always careful to draw a distinction between the teachings of Jesus vs religious dogma. I make it clear that I don't think their religion is the religion Jesus would approve of at all. In other words, even though they consider themselves followers of Jesus, are they really following his teachings, or are they following the old testament, which is filled with judgment, wrath, violence and hatred? Would Jesus hate anyone? Would Jesus be violent? I ask them those questions.

I can't support gay marriage, I can't play on Sunday, I can't NOT hate people who don't like the pledge of allegiance with "one nation under god" in it, etc. They want me to hate.

What I do in those cases is stand firm, and point out that Jesus wouldn't approve of their hatred. Remind them of the Jesus quotes about turning the other cheek, judge not lest thou be judged, let he who is without sin cast the first stone, forgive seventy times seven, love your enemies, and all that cool stuff. Show them that hatred is anti-Jesus!

Here is a website that might help:

http://jesusisaliberal.com/

I remember my hubby and I went to dinner with a bunch of people that he served a mormon mission with, and he had left the church by then. He had a small "soul patch" type of goatie, and his hair was slightly longer. He had on a hippie choker (and he looked smokin' hot, I might add...haha). The missionary friends were "aghast" at the change in him ....very shocked, and they said so. He's still the same man (only better...hehe) I want to be me without having people condemn me for it...especially when they think they can flaunt their 'true selves' in my face without so much as a wince from me.

Remind them that Jesus had long hair and a beard. (supposedly) If they're shocked, laugh it off. I mean, seriously, how ridiculous is that anyway??? To be shocked about a bit of hair?? Don't play their game. Stand above it.

Some Jehovah Witnesses came by recently. I told them all the stuff I just said, but with a radiant smile. Then I gave them big sloppy hugs and they just about freaked out! They think they've got a monopoly on God and joy. I told them they didn't. And I showed them that they didn't.

I think about this kind of thing quite often. For instance, I can be watching a darling little girl playing and saying something cute (and she was black)...so later I'd tell someone about it: "Oh, you should have seen the precious little BLACK girl I saw playing today...blah blah blah." Would I do that if the child was white? Would I say, "Oh you should have seen the darling little WHITE child I saw today..."? Nope...I wouldn't. It has really made me look deep inside at all the labels we give each other. Black, white, gay, lesbian, heterosexual, transsexual, republican, democrat, yuppie, hip-hopper, "star" (barf), etc. We're all people.

Whenever I need to describe someone to another person, I make a point to deliberately leave out their ethnicity. Then I have fun watching when they meet for the first time. Sometimes the white person will actually say, "You didn't tell me he was black!" to which I'll say, "Why should I mention that? Why would that matter?"

We have to draw the line on hate. Refuse to participate. When Obama got elected, I discovered, to my horror, that all my brothers are bigots. I had no idea! Our parents were prejudiced against rich people, but not against black people. So I was shocked when my brothers said ugly racist things about the new president. One of my brothers became obsessed with his ultra-conservative beliefs and told me how concerned he was about me, since I had the audacity to disagree with him. He got really ugly and hung up on me when I refused to agree with him about Obama.

I called him back and, wow, it felt like I was channeling! The words just flowed out...I told him I loved him but would not participate in racism. I asked him if his political beliefs were worth losing his sister over. I reminded him that Jesus taught love and peace...essentially I shamed him into realizing what he had been doing.

He softened and apologized.

Sometimes, just confronting the STS behavior they are engaging in, is the appropriate action. Not always. Sometimes it's better to just walk away. It depends on the situation. When in doubt, I ask for guidance...then go with what flows.