09-05-2015, 01:00 PM
(09-05-2015, 12:34 PM)Jade Wrote: Interesting premise, a lot of it rings true. We do come to 3D to experience the "lack", including, I would think, the illusion of lack of free will. Our Higher selves are the ones who really have the free will, and make the decisions - it was their freewill to choose to incarnate as a singular entity, and yes as humans we are stuck with that - which is why I think work in consciousness is so important, because as we communicate more with our higher selves and bring that part of us into our 3D lives, I think that is what allows us more and more "free will". The higher self just recognizes the trappings of the illusion better than we do.
I think we have free will, BUT, the illusion has a lag time, a delay in manifestation. The delay is getting less and less as we move closer to 4D. But the delay gives us the "illusion" that we don't create our own reality, so we have so many conflicting thoughts that go back and forth (Is earth heaven? Or hell? Or heaven? Or hell? It'll reflect both back and forth if you don't make up your mind! Or if you decide that it's hell...)
I think this is reflective of faith being the gateway to the indigo ray. We can manifest our desires but we must have faith in the system that it will come through. Of course, when that faith has been battered and trampled it's hard to find it again, but I think it is one of the most important components.
I don't think you're a monster or an a******.
I'm not a monster, I just have parts of me that are.
Regarding the Faith and the Indigo Ray, the mechanics work for love or hate. If you peer through that gateway without a disciplined mind and intent, you will see some of the most horrific terrible things you can imagine, I only know because it was my doing so right out of Work in Consciousness while my system was still completely open that I completely terrorized my mind. You could ask Yera, I basically had a complete mental collapse while talking to her trying to make sense of the dimensions of pain and suffering I was witnessing. I even asked Plenum before that the time that all started happening to give me a bit of healing from his services because some part of me saw it coming. I still attribute Plenum's healing service as the only reason I survived that experience...
That and Yera's kindness towards my insanity.
I agree on the lag time, but I think you misunderstand that I do not view Earth as fully Hell. In my Frame of Mind, Earth IS Heaven and Hell, it contains both. From that I surmised Heaven and Hell are too illusions (or essentially the equally real realms of heaven like existence and hell like existence, real in that they're constructs like Earth; Real Illusions, or a Real/Illusion Construct.) So in my mind it isn't, is Earth Heaven, Hell, Heaven, Hell. It's more like, I see Hell, I see Heaven, I don't understand Hell, why does it exist? What's it's reason for being? Why must they suffer? Why do they desire to suffer? I don't understand. Now I'm in Hell trying to understand and it's FRICKIN HELL. (lol)
But there are premises that are terrifying to consider, this was one of them. I dislike it, greatly but many are caught in it's gravity-well like constructed-belief.
It explains the Human perspective of Existence for MANY on this Earth, even if they aren't aware of a belief system, they feel the same suffering this place incites, only they're literally stuck in it. I have a decent life, I can back away, go watch netflix or smoke or lay down in a comfy bed and try to relax. They can't. They are suffering relentlessly Hell-like.
That is why I look so much despite the pain. I can't comprehend why the Creator would desire this level of suffering, or derive pleasure from it. I mean, I comprehend the idea and ideals behind it, vampirism and such, but...Why?
I'm stuck, it's the same question at a different area.
I always come back to this question Jade. "Why?"
I do not know. I fear I will never discover the utter true answer, the Truth behind 'Why?' Imagine a kid asking you Why endlessly, that kid was and is me. I ask Why, and sometimes there is no answer, and that is unacceptable to me. This might not be the density of understanding, but for the most part, I understand. So I seek Truth. (I jokingly call it Truth Seeking)
I've discovered a few things here and there, let the creative parts play out scenarios.
But I just don't know anymore. It all, the suffering, it makes me so sad. So mad. So attached... So sorrowful. I imagine what if that were I.
It doesn't feel good. Why would the Creator desire such??
Gemini: I don't desire to be stuck, why must I perform like an athlete to be half-way to Pure Love or almost completely selfish just to leave?? This isn't Free Will sounding to me.
