Wandering upon the affective terrain

[Billy]

Emotions have been a source of great confusion for me.  There are so many different opinions as to the nature of emotions and how to best work with them, that I have kind of just given up on them for the time being.  I'm definitely guilty of suppressing a great deal of emotion as I often find them too overwhelming to deal with and make sense of. 

One thing I am trying to do, and seek to get better at, is to feel my 'inner body' whenever unpleasant emotion shows itself.  Not much reflection as to it's source, just the attempt to feel it fully.  I have noticed that by magnifying my focus on the emotion in the body, more often than not it tends to dissipate rather quickly.  I can't help but wonder though if I am just fooling myself into thinking I am processing the emotion when in actual fact it is just more suppression.  How can you truly know when you have dealt with an emotion or just suppressed it?  I don't generally express my emotions, or more precisely those that I label as unpleasant, but also the more positive ones.  I laugh and joke and smile quite a lot but almost never express anger, hostility or dislike.  Do these things need to be expressed or can they be worked with entirely on an internal level? 

Ra's balancing exercise I have as of yet been unable to apply in any meaningful way in my life.  Having tried it, I have found that I often end up getting caught in thought and wondering if I am doing it correctly or not.  Perhaps perseverance and faith are required.  I'm glad you have had insights into these things Jeremy, they are quite wonderful when they occur.