Being institutionalized.

[Agua del Cielo]

So as of lately I've been...Well.  I guess I'll just say it the way I say it to myself.

I feel like a loser and a failure.

Tack this on with how many jobs have turned me down and the daily belittlement and debasement from my mother who thinks I've done nothing instead of trying.

I'm a bit emotionally crippled with depression.  So I've been staying in bed more this week than usual.  Just lying there trying to not think about how much I can't function.

So my mom gets home (just a few minutes ago) and immediately starts screaming at me to immediately talk to her "Or Else". I don't encourage her attitude anymore and so gave her the cold-shoulder.  When she's like that I don't unlock and open the door for MY safety.

So she flipped her s*** and made it very clear she's going to put me in a psych facility.

So I guess I'm wondering if anyone's ever been in one and what its like and what can I expect?

Short-term facilities are basically just locked units where you're supposed to attend groups, take meds, and meet with a doctor. Electronics are not allowed, books are (but some ban horror novels and most ban porn), and clothing with violence/drug references/profanity/gang-related are b&. Typical stays are 3 days-2 weeks, and always less than 90 days unless there's a court order. They can't make you stay there unless you're an immediate danger to self or others (in the U.S.).

Long-term facilities are basically the same thing with more freedoms in some areas - electronics might be allowed, you can get day-passes to leave the facility on good behavior, etc., but, ibviously, it's long-term. A court order is required to make you stay somewhere like that, and if your mom tries to take it to court, leave her house immediately so that she no longer has legal standing to say you can't take care of yourself. Even managing yourself homelessly is enough to keep the judge away.

Long-term places have a much higher ratio of abusive workers. Some of them are absolute Hell, and the doctors and staff are sadistic. Some aren't like that, of course, but the long-term ones are like that, some of them. The short-term places are always okay, in my experience.

All of these places are run by Illuminati-types and are trying to suppress spiritual knowledge. Just try talking to a doctor about the astral plane or kundalini awakenings or premonitions... it'll be antipsychotics for you immediately. No occult talk if you do go. Some of those people do know and are STS as f***,

And their drugs are BAD. FOR. YOU.

They fucking WRECK your brain.

I'll post more about this later.

I recommend staying away... some of the peeople in some of those places really care, and some absolutely do not, but the net effect is negative.

If we all were in a ward and they would find out about this forum, they would never let us get out again!
:/