I'm choosing the negative path.

[Louisabell]

I myself refrain from violence and sexual exploitation mostly because I'm not learned enough to properly deal with the karmic blowback. In my own situation, I have loads and loads of really nasty karma, so I refrain from activities that could likely trigger an explosion.

Nothing wrong with playing games, but learning takes precedence, or should... Most of the people on the negative path are probably like you: trading stocks, focusing on a specific fetish or goal, etc., and the ones doing the negative work because they seriously want to polarize are few and far between, comparatively speaking. The right reason to polarize negative is the knowledge that it brings.

And what happens when your master commands you to do these acts? Do you really think you're better than the big shots on the other side of the veil? Your understanding of the negative path is at novice level.

Lot of talk in this thread about how the forces of darkness might be trying to trick OP, or are giving him these thoughts... have you ever considered that it might not have been you crying out?

I was raised Christian - though I never resonated or engaged with it - and so there's been a certain level of connection to that current etherically. And of course they're always "praying" for me, which has helped sometimes but is usually just fucking annoying. And which has invaded my etheric body during times of trauma. Or maybe it was more of an echo than an invasion. But they sent their intent into the astral implants used for thought insertion by the mental health types, and it resonated. It's embarassing and annoying sometimes - they're desperate to get me to come back to their current.

I myself can't see ever (re)connecting with that religion. I'm filled with hate for them. I was raised on demonic vibrations that always resonated a lot faster and a lot harder than Christianity ever did.

If you come from a "positive" background, you might have to work harder and be a lot more violent than your competitors to keep from being seen as an easy target.

Why do you think I went dark? I thought Christianity was a religion for slaves, and Lucifer was only trying to reassert our rightful place here on Earth as Gods.

I was only seventeen when I invoked something I shouldn't have, I got locked in a thought battle for six hours because I refused to be used as a vessel. I held out pretty long until I realised the sacrifice was too great, so I called out to the most loving entity I knew of at the time to save me from my stupidity. It worked instantly, I was finally free.  

I didn't even become a Christian afterwards, that's how ungrateful I was. I just ignored it all until I found the LOO and could make sense of what happened.

I'm sick of pretending the negative path is benign. It's not. There are NO conditions to it. You order yourself in strict hierarchies based on the strength of your willpower for men, or your desire for women, then you serve whoever your master is. And if anyone here is actually serious about it, then the best advice I can give is get to work because you have a lot of competition ahead of you.