I'm choosing the negative path.

[Mahakali]

And what happens when your master commands you to do these acts? Do you really think you're better than the big shots on the other side of the veil? Your understanding of the negative path is at novice level.

According to the demons, I will eventually join my murdered friends in Hell. They told me what they have planned for me. At the same time, I'm too in love with the Darkness to walk away, and there are creative alternatives that most people apparently don't think about much...

>And what happens when your master commands you to do these acts?

I stick my tongue out? Well, depending upon the situation. I'm not known for being cooperative when something orders me around. I don't intimidate easy. Sounds like that'd be from the sort of organization in which you'll spend more time tryna "earn your bones" and suck dick for promorions than actually polarizing, and I'm not interested in that. My goal is spiritual development, not playing the game, and it seems like it'd be less problematic just to grab a bunch of AK's and hold your position.

Do I think I can win a boxing match with Mike Tyson? Maybe not. Do I find it likely that Mike Tyson has any interest in fighting me personally? Not really.

I support the demon gods. But it's probably human egos I have to worry about.

Most humans are dopamine monkey puppets. Even on the lower levels of the Dark Side, everyone's addicted to something; everyone does their work if they get what they want, or allows themselves to be threatened, or just gets caught up in the games they like to play. There are a minority who are probably extremely dangerous. I've gotten in s***-flinging contests with some of them, and... I'd really like to avoid doing that anymore if I can help it, but they're not outright omnipotent.

Structure and hierarchy are not as strictly necessary as some here think they need to be. I'm betting that a lot of you are used to working within a corporate structure and just aren't capable of thinking any other way, just like how a lot of people are so used to nationa government that they couldn't imagine a city-state or an anarchist society (like Native Americans had) working... and within corporate structure, and within most gangs and things like that, it's about a handful of people making themselves comfortable with material pleasures, and a bunch of lapdogs trying to be accepted into the fold and offered promotions. You need a helping hand to the top.

This allows for maximum capitalization of power by those at the top, but is also terribly inefficient. My first attempt at starting a negatively oriented group, eventually broken apart by infiltrators and police, we planned for our own deaths and structured it so that the org would have easily survived a decapitation strike (or would have, if it'd made it out of those crucial early days), and honestly, I could go on for an hour here about how some respected negative organizations aren't going at it nearly as hard as they could be.

There is still plenty of room in this world for control. There are a lot of places and people I wouldn't f*** around with, but there are still very many untouched places and places run by people who could be killed easily with a little bit of ambition. Add, on top of that, that most negative organizations are composed primarily of puppets and/or people who are more interested in having fun or being comfortable than doing what's necessary (which I'm guilty of sometimes myself, but at least I'm not capable of having fun, anyway), and the competition starts looking a lot thinner. Significant, but not boxing-match-with-Mike-Tyson impossible.

I'm not an easy boy to intimidate. I've been tortured physically, psychologically, emotionally, and spiritually. I know what they're capable of, and I've gotten glimpses of Hell. I still stick my tongue out.

My goal is really not to jump into that whole game, and I know there are ways out. I also don't think there's one "dark side"; there's probably a lot of them. There's probably a lot of realities outside of this one, and a lot of possibility for boxes matches being avoided rather than won.

I don't think it's very Satanic of me to meekly hand over my mind and will.

I don't think of anyone or anything as my "master". If someone I consider a friend or an ally asked me to commit an act of violence or rape or whatever, it'd depend on the specifics of the situation. And the likelihood of whether or not it'd blow up some of the karma I'm trying to burn off. If it were problematic, I'd tell them to go f*** themselves, or at least a solid "no". But if they're my ally, they wouldn't be trying to force me to do something that'd hamper my development. If they're more interested in gold-hoarding than spiritual development, or helping their allies develop, there's probably somewhere better I could be.

As far as the sorcerers connected to the demons go, I think opinions about me are mixed. I think the worst of them are disgusted by my arrogance and have tried in the past to stomp me into the dirt to make me meek and submissive, but they mistook me for someone who is weak, and I'm still sitting around here making everyone frown.

They said they'd break me. They didn't break s***.

As far as the demons themselves go... the big bads... I don't think they are against me personally. I don't really like the idea of having my subtle-body sucked down into the lower dimensions and enslaved (negative time/space), but I'm trying to find a way to negate that.

I guess as far as some of it goes, I have to rely upon unforgiveness and just be ready to circle back around and respond whenever I am able, be willing to waste a lot of polarity for the purposes of vengeance even if I have to inconvenience myself to do it. The people who f*** with me better be ready to look over their backs for the rest of their existence, this incarnation and beyond.

That said, again, I'm not interested in playing their game. And a lot of their game is just convincing people that there's no alternative to it. Keep them looking a few inches in front of their face and no further... most people just accept that, just submit after they get a beating and allow themselves to become failures...

If I haven't given up yet, there's no reason for anyone else to.

I think it's possible for me to do... something. To get revenge, at the very least, and probably something more.