Hopelessness

[Surfboard]

I feel as i'm stuck in a loop of experience where I repeat this incarnation over and over again. A cycle in which I continually figure out my illusion from intelligent energy; while not being able to apply it with respect to service to others as I have blockages which I can't overcome the resistance. As my consciousness begins to fully understand consciousness my thoughts start to charge my third eye giving me the ability to see space/time. In my third eye, I create and open the gate through thought and as I communicate through thought at the gates of intelligent infinity, I understand my lesson wasn't learned, I come back to relive this incarnation living in a never ending cycle. I come back and relive the same exact path as freewill is but an illusion. I know this isn't the first or second time, and probably not the last time I relive this exact time/space.

And boy do I feel hopeless.