(03-21-2018, 11:47 PM)peregrine Wrote: Hmmm. Well, to take that a step further, Q'uo has mentioned a few times that higher density beings sometimes weigh the whole of their vibration and find themselves more cogent in the Love department than in Wisdom department, and then choose situations in 3rd Density which will call them to look at an excessive surplus of love and consider whether or not this is the way to serve. Because in 3D this distortion can distress one to the core, it gives an opportunity to strengthen your Wisdom muscles which might help re-balance your entire soul stream. (By the way, they also speak of right use of power in the same way as Wisdom, Love balance/imbalance.
So, maybe it would be useful to look within yourself to see if you find your wholly self-giving m/o to be wise or not? Maybe you could look inward to see if the power and energy exchange pattern you are sharing is what you feel is truly good and proper?
For example, you might find that your participation in this set-up partly supports your own need for security. If you discover that and desire to change it, what would be a better use of power? How could you re-posture or modify your need to give in such a way as to create more balance (i.e., less strain) in your mind, body and spirit?
I hope this is helpful.
I feel that, in this dark world, those who seek only to help and serve tend to be treated as doormats. It feels entirely improper but i have encountered noting but this.
My family situation seems to mirror this greatly. Having been ostracized because of my polarity. Even from a very young age (mother incapable of loving me).
This lapse in love has led me to seek it to the utmost degree wanting nothing more than to help others.
I just find it hard to distinguish the polarization for these "students" shall we call them, from either positive or negative. In turn, the negative/STS adept can fully utilize the services provided by the STO oriented individual, in a selfish manner.
I find in my heart that this is happening in my current situation and it couldnt feel more wrong or incorrect to me. I feel like im trying desperately to convert someone to a different polarity who very well may have chosen a path opposite to mine currently. Yet i still pour my love into this individual, in return, they continue to abuse me and make very little efforts to change.
Leaving this person is not an option, given their instability, and im very certain id feel empty or without purpose if i wasnt to have a "project" of sorts to be channeling my love into. Not to mention the immense guilt id feel if they committed suicide as they often threaten.
As for reducing the strain this is having on me, yes it is immense, i have recently turned to self-medicating with hard drugs and its scary. However i dont see the drugs "possessing" me as they do others, rather, they give me a temporary release and relief, perhaps hearkening back to what it may abiently feel like on a more dense planet. Not really abusing them just using as medication in small doses really.
And having wrote this all just now I begin is see the paradoxical nature of why i even made this thread.. I knew that creating the thread will not reveal anything that could not be seeked or gained or known prior. Theres absolutely no hope of me leaving this situation at this point and i knew this already. I guess i just wished for support in knowing, perhaps, that situations like this can be common.
When i research higher realms all i can think of is how deeply i want to show this to my partner, to let them see a better and more free reality and ultimately grow spiritually. Even is they are STs polarized (not 95% probably) i think their higher self is guiding them towards the STO path but perhaps in a way that is very slow. Like multiple lifetimes or another cycle slow.... the question then remains... do i continue to follow and seek to help this individual polarize? Is it selfish for me to leave? Or maybe in my STO to them, im helping them polarize to STS?
Thank you for your responses.